In this discussion, Jeff Wetzler, Co-CEO of Transcend and author of *Ask*, shares insights from his 25+ years in business and education. He highlights the barriers to open conversations in workplaces, revealing that many team members feel uncomfortable speaking up. By suggesting that leaders create a welcoming environment, adjust timing and medium, and clarify intentions, Jeff illustrates how to foster resilience and enhance communication. Personal anecdotes complement his strategies for encouraging candid dialogue on difficult topics.
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Near Implosion at Teach for America
Jeff Wetzler shares a story from his time at Teach for America where a summer institute nearly imploded.
Despite his check-ins, colleagues didn't reveal the true struggles due to a lack of psychological safety.
insights INSIGHT
Silence in the Workplace
Many managers withhold concerns from their bosses despite the issue's importance.
Creating a safe environment for open communication is crucial.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Meeting on Their Turf
Prioritize others' comfort for open communication.
Meet them in their preferred space and time, not your own.
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In 'Turn the Ship Around!', Captain L. David Marquet recounts his experience as the commander of the USS Santa Fe, a nuclear-powered submarine. Initially trained in the traditional 'know all–tell all' leadership model, Marquet faced significant challenges when he took command of the Santa Fe, which was then one of the worst-performing submarines in the fleet. He realized that the traditional leader-follower approach was ineffective and decided to implement a leader-leader model, where every crew member was empowered to take responsibility and make decisions. This approach led to a dramatic improvement in morale, performance, and retention, transforming the Santa Fe into one of the best submarines in the fleet. The book provides practical insights and strategies for implementing this leadership model in various organizational settings.
High Conflict
Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out
Amanda Ripley
In High Conflict, Amanda Ripley delves into the phenomenon of 'high conflict,' which is distinct from the useful friction of healthy conflict. High conflict involves good-versus-evil feuds that lead to an 'us versus them' mentality, altering brain behavior and increasing feelings of superiority while worsening the conflict. The book follows various individuals in different contexts, including a conflict expert in California, a Chicago gang leader, and communities in Colombia, to illustrate how people get trapped in and eventually escape high conflict. Ripley highlights common forces such as conflict entrepreneurs, humiliation, and false binaries that drive high conflict and provides insights on how to transform these conflicts into productive ones by rehumanizing opponents and reviving curiosity and wonder.
Jeff Wetzler: Ask
Jeff Wetzler is co-CEO of Transcend, a nationally recognized innovation organization, and an expert in learning and human potential. His experience spans 25+ years in business and education, as a management consultant to top corporations, a learning facilitator for leaders, and as Chief Learning Officer at Teach For America.
He is a member of the Aspen Global Leadership Network and is an Edmund Hillary Fellow. Jeff is the author of Ask: Tap Into the Hidden Wisdom of People Around You for Unexpected Breakthroughs in Leadership and Life*.
Leaders are not the only people who need to have difficult conversations in the workplace. Yet, leaders set the tone for how much people are willing and able to talk about hard things. In this episode, Jeff and I discuss how leaders can make it easier for those important conversations to happen.
Key Points
In one study of managers, most people admitted to remaining silent with their bosses and nearly 75% said colleagues also felt uncomfortable speaking up.
Meet people on their own turf. Others are more likely to speak up if they are in a setting that’s more comfortable for them.
Leaders should consider shifting timing and/or medium to one that’s of the preference for the person who doesn’t have power.
Explain why you’re asking about a topic and your intention for a conversation at the start. Providing context prevents people from having to guess at your agenda.
Set a mutual agenda for a conversation by asking a question like, “In addition to this, what else should be part of our conversation today?”
Establish a tone for open communication by radiating resilience. Words like these might help: “If I were in your shoes, I might be feeling frustrated or even resentful. If that’s how you’re feeling, I would understand completely. Please don’t hold back.”
Resources Mentioned
Ask: Tap Into the Hidden Wisdom of People Around You for Unexpected Breakthroughs in Leadership and Life* by Jeff Wetzler
Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes
How to Ask Better Questions, with David Marquet (episode 454)
The Way Out of Major Conflict, with Amanda Ripley (episode 529)
How to Grow From Your Errors, with Amy Edmondson (episode 663)
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