Live Well Be Well with Sarah Ann Macklin | Health, Lifestyle, Nutrition

Paul Gilbert: Why You Don’t Control Your Own Thoughts! | Be Well Moments

Feb 3, 2025

In this engaging conversation, expert Paul Gilbert delves into the complexities of the mind and emotional regulation. He reveals that we don't actually control our emotions—our brains were wired for certain responses long before we had any say. Gilbert discusses the concept of the shadow self, the evolutionary origins of feelings like shame and fear, and why awareness of these emotions is crucial. He encourages listeners to work with their feelings instead of resisting them, offering insightful strategies for self-compassion.

08:11

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Episode guests

Paul Gilbert

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Quick takeaways

Shadow emotions often ignored, like shame and anger, must be acknowledged for greater self-awareness and compassion toward ourselves and others.

Our emotions are shaped by evolution, emphasizing that we don't consciously choose them, thus reducing feelings of guilt and shame associated with these reactions.

Deep dives

Understanding Shadow Emotions and Compassion

Shadow emotions represent the parts of ourselves that we often ignore or reject, such as feelings of anger, weakness, or shame. These emotions are deeply rooted in our psyche and can create resistance when we try to confront them. Acknowledging and understanding shadow emotions is critical for developing compassion, both for oneself and others. When we fail to recognize these hidden aspects, we can struggle with our emotional responses, complicating our journey toward greater self-awareness and connection.

Understanding Shadow Emotions and Self-Awareness

3min

The Illusion of Control: Understanding Emotions and Consciousness

5min

Be Well Moments brings you my favorite bite-sized highlights from the season. Enjoy quick insights from our longer conversations in a digestible format. If you'd like to listen or watch the full episode, click the link below.

I sat down with Paul Gilbert for one of the most eye-opening conversations about the mind. What if I told you that you didn’t actually choose your emotions? That your brain was wired long before you had any say in the matter?

We got into the shadow self, why we resist certain emotions, and how evolution basically tricked us into feeling things like shame, guilt, and fear. Paul explains why we react the way we do, why some emotions feel impossible to control, and—most importantly—how we can work with them instead of against them.

If you’ve ever felt like your mind has a mind of its own, this one’s for you.

Listen to the full episode here.

Watch the full episode on YouTube here.

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