EPISODE 214: The Truth About Being Touch-Starved (Even In A Happy Relationship)

12 snips

Jun 27, 2025

This week, the hosts unpack the power of physical touch in relationships. They discuss the concept of 'touch starvation' and its impact, revealing that many couples crave more emotional and physical connection. Listeners learn the difference between sexual and non-sexual touch, and how both are essential for intimacy. With practical tips and a quick exercise to enhance affection, they emphasize the importance of communication about touch preferences. Tune in for insights that could spark new connections!

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INSIGHT

Touch Creates Emotional Connection

Touch fosters emotional connection through closeness, safety, and trust between partners.
It releases oxytocin, the bonding hormone, which deepens intimacy and connection.

INSIGHT

Sustain Touch Beyond New Love

Long-term relationships often lose the spontaneous touch excitement from early love stages.
We should consciously reintroduce touching rituals to maintain connection and intimacy over time.

ANECDOTE

Man's Poetic Touch Starvation

A man describes feeling touch starved despite love and communication with his partner.
He longs for non-sexual touch to feel wanted and emotionally connected again.

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This week, we’re diving into something that seems simple but holds a lot of power in your relationship: touch.

Whether it's a lingering hug, a soft shoulder squeeze, or just holding hands while watching Netflix — physical touch is one of the most important (and underrated) ways to build connection, intimacy, and trust.

But if you’ve found yourselves touching less — or if touch feels off somehow — you’re not alone. We asked our audience, and:

47% said they want more touch
37% said they want better touch

In this episode, we’re breaking down why touch is so essential — and why so many couples stop doing it. (Spoiler: it's not just about sex.) Plus, we’re giving you practical tools and one super simple free exercise (takes 5 minutes) to start reconnecting through touch today.

💛 Here’s what we’re covering:

The emotional and physical benefits of touch (for both of you)
Why “touch starvation” is real — even in long-term relationships
The surprising ways you may be unintentionally avoiding touch
The difference between sexual and non-sexual touch — and why both matter
What to do if your partner says “touch just isn’t my love language”
Quick, everyday ways to bring more affection into your relationship (no grand gestures required)

✨ Ready to explore all the ways to touch?

We created The Secret Touch Blueprint to help you and your partner reflect on what kinds of touch feel best to you — and how to talk about it together.

Grab it here → https://free.vmtherapy.com/touch-blueprint

And if doing that exercise leaves you thinking, “Wait… I want more of this,” you’ll love what’s coming next.

This July, we’re launching a 4-week Sensual Touch Challenge exclusively inside our Deeper membership.

It’ll walk you through 8 specific types of touch — from relaxing to arousing — with fun prompts, step-by-step videos, and guided exercises to try with your partner.

It’s designed to bring back the playfulness, the exploration, and the kind of touch that makes you feel again.

💥 Pillow Talks listeners get 25% off their first month of Deeper with code PILLOW → https://vmtherapy.com/touch

Links & resources:

👋🏻 The Secret Touch Blueprint →https://free.vmtherapy.com/touch-blueprint
💥 Join the Sensual Touch Challenge (starting July 7 inside Deeper) → https://vmtherapy.com/touch

Stay connected:

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