The Libido Fairy Podcast #106: The Deeper Reasons Why You Don't Want Sex Anymore
Sep 21, 2025
Discover the deeper reasons women often lose their desire for intimacy. Explore the difference between responsive and spontaneous desire. Learn how internal pressures and perfectionism can kill sexual interest. Find out why the quality of sexual experiences matters and how rewarding sex can reignite passion. Dive into relationship dynamics affecting desire, from disconnection to the need for novelty. Plus, learn somatic practices to help you stay present and connected. Get actionable insights to boost your intimacy!
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Two Types Of Desire
- Desire comes in two forms: spontaneous and responsive, and most women have responsive desire.
- Responsive desire needs bodily or contextual stimulation before the brain feels "I want to."
Talk About Pressure With Your Partner
- Avoid internalizing your partner's wants and creating performance pressure around sex.
- Talk to your partner, ask for reassurance, and lower perfectionist expectations to reduce anxiety and boost desire.
Pressure Kills Pleasure
- Pressure and perfectionism kill pleasure because sex becomes performance instead of connection.
- Long-term change requires inner work to feel 'enough' beyond external reassurance.
