It’s All Your Fault: High Conflict People

High Conflict People in Mediation, Emotional Triggers in BIFF Responses, and Hereditary Antisocial Personality Disorder

Apr 6, 2023

Learn about the challenges mediators face with high conflict personalities in mediation. Explore the 'new ways for mediation' method and tips for managing high conflict people. Discover how emotions can impact interactions and the importance of empathy. Understand the genetic nature of antisocial personality disorder and setting limits. Learn how to spot sociopathic behavior and engage with the podcast through questions and reviews.

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ADVICE

Mediation and High-Conflict Personalities

High-conflict personalities often struggle in mediation and may need the authority of a lawyer or judge.
Educate clients on legal standards early in the process to manage expectations and encourage lawyer involvement for reality checks.

ADVICE

Managing Emotions in High-Conflict Situations

Acknowledge emotions but shift focus to actionable solutions when working with high-conflict individuals.
Avoid extensive emotional exploration, as it can be counterproductive, especially outside of specialized therapy.

INSIGHT

Heritability of Antisocial Personality Disorder

Antisocial personality disorder has a stronger hereditary link than other personality disorders, often appearing across generations.
However, not everyone related to someone with ASPD will develop it, and healthy upbringing can mitigate genetic predispositions.

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In this episode, Bill and Megan continue answering listener questions:

“I am a family mediator. My practice focuses on keeping people out of court and helping them navigate their divorce in mediation. In my experience, high conflict personalities do NOT do well in this kind of mediation. It’s as if they “need” the authority of a lawyer or even a judge to bring their expectations and demands into the realm of reality. They often “shoot themselves in the foot” as well.”
“I’m curious if you are familiar with Nonviolent Communication. Listening to the BIFF responses podcast, which I love, I’m curious if you consider the emotional side of things when working with companies. I have found that empathy can mitigate emotional triggers so people CAN deliver BIFF responses. Until and unless people get empathy, they may not be able to BIFF it!”
“Do you often see High Conflict with Antisocial Personality Disorder in multiple generations? After listening to your podcast about ASD with HCD, I think my father had ASD, and my younger sibling has both. My father passed away after creating much chaos during his life, including disowning me. My sibling is very much alive, and creating a lot of chaos and problems?”

Links & Other Notes

BOOKS
COURSE
- New Ways for Mediation (general mediation) training
- New Ways for Mediation (family mediation) training
ARTICLES
Our website: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/
Submit a Question for Bill and Megan
All of our books can be found in our online store or anywhere books are sold, including as e-books.
You can also find these show notes at our site as well.

Note: We are not diagnosing anyone in our discussions, merely discussing patterns of behavior.

(00:00) - Welcome to It's All Your Fault
(01:34) - More Listener Questions
(02:21) - Mediation and Authority
(07:27) - Non-Violent Communication
(11:05) - Antisocial Personality Disorder Inherited?
(18:18) - Reminders & Coming Next Week: More Listener Questions

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