This book unfolds as a dialogue between a young man and a philosopher over five nights, exploring the principles of Adlerian psychology. It emphasizes that true happiness and freedom come from living a life independent of past traumas and societal expectations. Key themes include the idea that all problems stem from interpersonal relationships, the importance of separating one's tasks from others', and the concept that freedom is found in having the courage to be disliked. The book provides practical advice on self-forgiveness, self-care, and mind decluttering, encouraging readers to take control of their life's direction and live in the present[3][4][5].
In 'The Big Leap,' Gay Hendricks addresses the concept of the Upper Limit Problem, where individuals subconsciously sabotage their own success and happiness due to deep-seated fears and limiting beliefs. The book introduces four zones of activity: the Zone of Incompetence, Zone of Competence, Zone of Excellence, and Zone of Genius. Hendricks emphasizes the importance of identifying and operating in the Zone of Genius, where one combines what they love doing with what they are exceptionally good at. He also outlines four common hidden barriers to success: feeling fundamentally flawed, fear of disloyalty and abandonment, believing more success brings a bigger burden, and the fear of outshining others. The book provides practical advice on overcoming these barriers, embracing continuous growth, and achieving a balance between professional success and personal fulfillment.
Gretchen Rubin's "The Four Tendencies" introduces a personality framework categorizing individuals into four tendencies: Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, and Rebels. Understanding these tendencies helps explain how people respond to inner and outer expectations, impacting their decision-making, habit formation, and relationships. The book provides self-assessment tools and practical advice for leveraging each tendency's strengths and navigating its challenges. It offers insights into personal productivity, communication, and conflict resolution. Ultimately, it promotes self-awareness and improved relationships.
Welcome back to ADHD-ish! In today's episode, I sit down with my friend, author, writer, and ADHD coach, Dave Greenwood, for another honest, thought-provoking conversation—this time exploring the powerful lessons of The Courage to Be Disliked, a book rooted in the teachings of 19th-century psychotherapist Alfred Adler. While not specifically an ADHD book, Dave shares how this book packs a punch of wisdom, challenging beliefs around people-pleasing and how ADHD rejection sensitivity at work connects to ADHD burnout and our endless need for approval.
We tackle the tricky balance between accepting yourself as you are and believing you can change, as well as the incredible (if not a little controversial) freedom that comes with having the courage to be disliked. If you've ever found yourself spiraling over a colleague's tone in Slack or questioning whether your boss thinks you're incompetent, this conversation about ADHD rejection sensitivity will hit different.
Top 3 takeaways for anyone navigating work or life with ADHD (or just being human):
- You are not responsible for how others feel. Adler’s “separation of tasks” is a game-changer—do your part authentically, but let go of trying to control what others think or feel about you.
- You can change—if you want to. It’s easy to blame your ADHD or circumstances (hello, fixed mindset!), but the real magic starts when you open yourself to possibility, even if change is slow and non-linear.
- All problems are (ultimately) relational. Whether you’re late to a meeting or starting a business, our challenges almost always revolve around other humans. Building healthier boundaries and self-acceptance opens the door to genuine connection—and some serious peace of mind.
Dave Greenwood is a repeat guest and friend of the ADHD-ish podcast, known for his authenticity and sense of humor. He is the host of the Overcoming Distractions podcast and author of two popular books on living with ADHD. Though Dave jokingly calls himself a “welding school flunk-out,” he brings a wealth of lived experience, professional insight, and a pragmatic approach to living well with ADHD, especially for the self-employed
🎙️Mic Drop Moment:
Whether it’s with your boss, your partner, your clients, or even your business software (yes, really), most of our challenges come down to relationships - with others and ourselves. Listen for insights on how “people-pleasing,” unhelpful narratives, and unresolved childhood scars shape our work and our lives.
Next steps:
Mentioned in this episode:
© 2025 ADHD-ish Podcast. Intro music by Ishan Dincer / Melody Loops / Outro music by Vladimir / Bobi Music / All rights reserved.
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