502: Learning to Get Past Your Past with Jason VanRuler
Nov 21, 2023
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Jason VanRuler, author of Get Past Your Past: How [...], discusses uncovering self-limiting beliefs, healing through music, manifesting desired character traits, family significance, patients opening up, Bob Gough's forward, challenging self-limiting beliefs, taking responsibility, personal growth, personal knowledge management, note-taking practices, rising to the level of goals, true connection, and resources to connect with Jason online.
Practicing awareness of self-limiting beliefs helps rewrite one's story and move towards healing and growth.
Vulnerability requires safe relationships, and sharing it too widely may lead to rejection or harm.
Deep dives
Overcoming self-limiting beliefs through awareness and challenge
A key takeaway from the podcast is the importance of practicing awareness of the thoughts and beliefs we have about ourselves. By giving clients tools like field notes notebooks, they can record their thoughts and identify patterns of self-limiting beliefs. These beliefs are often rooted in past experiences or what others have told them, and may no longer be accurate or helpful. By challenging these beliefs and seeking evidence to the contrary, individuals can start rewriting their story and moving towards healing and personal growth.
The power of vulnerability and safe relationships
The podcast emphasizes the role of vulnerability in building strong relationships, but also highlights the importance of surrounding oneself with safe people. Vulnerability should not be mistaken for venting; rather, it requires identifying trustworthy individuals with whom one can share their deepest thoughts and emotions. Practicing vulnerability with safe people allows for meaningful connection and growth. The podcast also discusses the dangers of sharing vulnerability too widely, as some individuals may not be equipped to handle it, potentially causing feelings of rejection or further harm.
Consistency and the value of genuine relationships
Consistency is highlighted as a crucial element in fostering genuine relationships and healthy connections. The podcast emphasizes the significance of showing up consistently for friends and loved ones. It mentions the importance of regular communication and checking in with others. Building on the research that men often form strong friendships in school due to consistent interaction, the podcast stresses the need for ongoing commitment and engagement to develop deep connections. Genuine relationships require effort, consistency, and asking open-ended questions to show interest and investment in others.
Acknowledging and addressing the impact of our past
The podcast reminds listeners that everyone has something from their past that affects their happiness and well-being, regardless of the severity. Rather than discounting or comparing the impact of one's past experiences, individuals are encouraged to acknowledge and address the lingering effects. The podcast suggests that self-reflection and a willingness to confront one's past can lead to personal growth and a release from the hold of unresolved issues. By recognizing and working through these challenges, individuals can create a path towards healing, happiness, and true connection with others.
Today’s guest and I seem to have a lot in common, and I’m so glad I was given the chance to meet him and interview him about his book. I think it’s one you definitely need to read for yourself. His name is Jason VanRuler, and his book is called Get Past Your Past: How […]