The Therapy Edit On not feeling good enough
Aug 7, 2023
A concise look at how global self-judgments differ from critiques of specific actions. Explores where harsh standards and perfectionism come from and how they block progress. Walks through practical ways to separate identity from mistakes and to repair relationships after slip-ups. Encourages finding small margins for self-compassion and moving forward without shame.
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Don't Equate Actions With Identity
- Saying "I am not good enough" targets your whole identity and carries huge emotional weight.
- Anna Mathur warns to notice when you conflate a behaviour with your core worth.
Separate Mistakes From Self
- Separate the behaviour from the person when you mess up and ask what need was unmet.
- Repair, learn or get a new tool instead of collapsing into global self-judgement.
Being 'Not Enough' Often Reflects Human Limits
- Many standards we hold are impossible because of our humanness and limited resources.
- Anna Mathur reframes 'never being enough' as a natural outcome of being human, not a personal failure.
