The Next Big Idea Daily "It's Not Me, It's You: Break the Blame Cycle. Relationship Better" by John Kim & Vanessa Bennett
Nov 3, 2023
Marriage therapists John Kim and Vanessa Bennett discuss the common tendency for people in relationships to blame their partners and emphasize the importance of looking inward and taking ownership. They also talk about embracing differences and empathy in relationships, finding beauty in contrasting approaches to life, and taking ownership of one's own actions in a relationship.
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No Happily Ever After
- There's no 'happily ever after'; relationships require rebuilding and ongoing work.
- Finding someone to invest in starts the work, it doesn't end it.
Fight The Right Way
- Fight in healthy ways by learning how to fight rather than avoiding conflict or trying to win.
- Create safe space so people feel heard, which produces relationship glue.
'We Never Fight' Is A Red Flag
- Saying 'we never fight' often signals hiding, not harmony.
- Normalizing conflict and fighting fairly prevents secrecy and builds understanding.