PsycHacks Episode 12: Should and anger
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Jul 29, 2021 Discover why 'should' statements lead to anger and how using them as predictors rather than judgments can lead to emotional growth and acceptance of reality.
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Should Thoughts Fuel Anger
- Thoughts containing "should" commonly generate anger when believed and attended to.
- Treating "should" as a moral demand on reality invites outrage and emotional suffering.
Reality Has No Moral Obligations
- Using "should" to imply reality has moral obligations is invalid and baseless.
- There is no written law that reality must align with our hopes and desires, however noble.
Use 'Should' To Mean Likely Outcome
- Use "should" as shorthand for the most likely outcome given present forces and factors.
- Base expectations on observed causes instead of imposing ideals onto reality.