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Modern Wisdom
#739 - Dr Robert Glover - The Lifetime Problem With Being A “Nice Guy”
Feb 1, 2024
In this engaging discussion, Dr. Robert Glover, a therapist and author specializing in men's issues, tackles the complexities of Nice Guy Syndrome. He uncovers how societal pressures lead to people-pleasing behaviors and the resentment that often follows. The conversation reveals the emotional struggles nice guys face in relationships, emphasizing the importance of authenticity over superficiality. Glover also highlights the significance of community support and men's groups in fostering genuine connections and personal growth, making a strong case for prioritizing self-care.
01:47:33
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Quick takeaways
- Being a Nice Guy involves trying to meet others' expectations, seeking approval, and hiding one's needs, wants, and sexuality.
- Nice Guys often have unspoken and unconscious agreements, known as covert contracts, with the world.
Deep dives
The Problem with Being a Nice Guy
Being a Nice Guy involves trying to meet others' expectations, seeking approval, and hiding one's needs, wants, and sexuality. This stems from an inaccurate belief that one is not okay as they are. Nice Guys often lack authenticity and struggle with being untrustworthy, frustrated, resentful, and passive-aggressive. By trying to please everyone, Nice Guys are often untruthful to themselves and others. This prevents them from living up to their full potential and pursuing their own desires and happiness.
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