Embrace the limitations of time and prioritize by neglecting the right things.
Find freedom and meaning in intentional choices, understanding the trade-offs in time management.
Deep dives
Finding Structure and Discipline for Pursuing Multiple Interests
Joey, a 25-year-old aspiring creative, struggles with managing his time and finding structure for his various interests. He desires to be a writer, skater, musician, and actor but finds it challenging to balance them all. He often hyperfocuses on one passion and then moves on quickly to another. Joey fears living without purpose and wants to prioritize his creative work over his retail job. He seeks advice on how to create a schedule and establish habits. Oliver Berkman, author of '4000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals,' offers insights into embracing the limitations of time. He suggests setting achievable, low-level goals for focused periods and learning to tolerate discomfort when making things wait. Instead of trying to do it all, the key is to prioritize and neglect the right things, finding satisfaction in the choices made.
Accepting the Impossible and Embracing Choice
Oliver Berkman shares his personal journey of realizing the impossibility of doing everything he thought he had to do within a limited timeframe. He encourages individuals to accept defeat and let go of the idea of fixing oneself. Rather than striving for control and solvency in time management, Berkman suggests embracing the freedom that comes from acknowledging the inherent limitations of being human. He proposes developing a two-to-do list system, focusing on achievable short-term goals, and putting important pursuits on the back burner temporarily. By making conscious choices and prioritizing, one can find meaning, even in the disappointment of neglecting certain interests.
The Joy of Missing Out and Living in the Present
Oliver Berkman discusses the concept of the 'Joy of Missing Out' (JOMO), which involves making intentional choices and understanding the trade-offs inherent in time management. While there may be many meaningful pursuits, it is impossible to do everything simultaneously. Berkman advises creating a bottleneck system, where only a limited number of tasks or goals are prioritized at any given time. He suggests focusing on achievable low-level goals and breaking down projects into manageable slivers of time. By understanding that some things will inevitably be neglected, individuals can find freedom and meaning in their choices, leading to a more fulfilling and present-oriented life.
Embracing Moments and Making Every Second Count
Oliver Berkman shares a perspective on time that encourages individuals to focus on the present moment rather than the grand scope of a lifetime. He suggests that rather than attempting to plan and control one's entire life, it is more empowering to focus on the next moment and how to make it meaningful. Berkman promotes finding purpose and making a difference in each moment while accepting the reality that it is impossible to do everything that matters. He recommends setting achievable daily goals for pursuits and seeing the value in making progress bit by bit. By understanding and accepting our limitations, we can find satisfaction and fulfillment in our daily choices.
Joey is a young creative living in Australia who can’t decide which hat to wear. Should it be songwriting, skateboarding, acting, or should he focus more on his day job as a retail clerk? Fitting everything in during the week seems impossible and he feels guilty when he can’t cross everything off his checklist. On this episode of How To!, co-host Amanda Ripley brings in journalist Oliver Burkeman, the author of 4000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals. He explains how he too once wanted to do it all, but eventually realized that it’s just not feasible. As Joey learns, letting go of some things and focusing on what really matters can actually lead to the ‘joy of missing out.’
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