World of Bullies #2: Unmasking Bullies in the Workplace and Mediation with Michael Lomax
Jun 13, 2024
auto_awesome
Guest Michael Lomax, co-founder of High Conflict Institute, discusses workplace bullying and mediation. Key topics include identifying bullies' characteristics, handling bullying allegations, and strategies for managing high conflict personalities in professional settings.
Managers should approach bullying allegations with a healthy skepticism and thoroughly investigate complaints.
Bullies often lack self-restraint, empathy, and remorse, and may recruit negative advocates to help target their victims.
Deep dives
Impact of Online Bullying in the Workplace
Bullying in the workplace has evolved with the increase of online interactions, where individuals display hostility through comments and behavior they wouldn't exhibit face-to-face. Studies reveal that a small percentage, about 5-10% of individuals, engage in continuous hostile online behavior. Bullies lack self-restraint and often resist organizational limits, resorting to legal action or playing the victim.
Mob Mentality and Targeting in Workplace Bullying
Workplace bullying often escalates into mobbing, where multiple individuals target one person under the influence of a high-conflict person or bully. The group dynamic can lead to observers being hesitant to intervene, creating a toxic workplace environment. Bullies typically select targets who may seem less capable of defending themselves, manipulating group dynamics to perpetuate the behavior.
Emotional Manipulation and Negative Advocates in Bullying
Bullies exhibit repetitive emotional communication to hook their targets and negative advocates, creating a cycle of emotional turmoil and distress. Emotions become contagious, affecting workplace morale and productivity. Skilled bullies play the victim to garner support and manipulate others into participating in their bullying behavior, creating a challenging environment for their targets.
The Role of Coaching and Mediation in Managing High-Conflict Personalities
Coaching before mediation helps prepare individuals for addressing high-conflict behaviors. It enables individuals to develop skills in emotional management, self-awareness, and flexible thinking, essential for resolving conflicts constructively. Mediation should follow coaching to assess improvements and readiness for effective conflict resolution. Managers should differentiate between management through mediation and structured coaching for long-term behavior improvement.
Confronting Bullies in the Workplace and Mediation with Bill Eddy and Michael Lomax
In the second episode of the World of Bullies series, Bill and Megan welcome Michael Lomax to explore bullying in the workplace and mediation. As co-founders of the High Conflict Institute and an esteemed speaker, respectively, they share their expertise on handling high conflict personalities in professional settings.
Bill and Michael emphasize the importance of managers thoroughly investigating bullying allegations and understanding the key characteristics of bullies, such as a lack of self-restraint, empathy, and remorse. They also discuss how bullies use emotional tactics to manipulate their targets and recruit negative advocates. Michael shares his experience meeting with alleged bullies who often present themselves as victims.
Questions we answer in this episode:
What are the key characteristics of a workplace bully?
How can managers effectively respond to bullying allegations?
How can mediators handle high conflict personalities in mediation?
Key Takeaways:
Managers should approach bullying allegations with a healthy skepticism and thoroughly investigate complaints.
Bullies often lack self-restraint, empathy, and remorse, and may recruit negative advocates to help target their victims.
Mediators can effectively handle high conflict personalities by remaining calm, setting boundaries, and focusing on realistic objectives.
This episode provides valuable insights and strategies for navigating bullying in the workplace and mediation, equipping listeners with the tools needed to create a healthier work environment.