Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

517 - Breaking the Approval Cycle

Feb 18, 2025

In this discussion, the hosts tackle the deep-rooted need for approval and its effects on relationships. They dissect the differences between approval-seeking and people-pleasing, while exploring how personality traits influence these behaviors. Insights into 'approval addiction' reveal its impact on self-esteem and communication. The conversation also highlights the struggle of balancing self-worth with the pursuit of validation, and emphasizes self-discovery through disconnecting from social media. Practical tips for healthier relationships are shared, promoting emotional well-being.

56:35

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Quick takeaways

Approval seeking manifests as a desire for validation from others, often leading to anxiety and low self-esteem in relationships.

Recognizing the difference between approval seeking and people-pleasing is crucial for navigating relationship dynamics effectively.

Moderate approval seeking can foster empathy and deeper intimacy, highlighting the importance of balancing external validation with self-approval.

Deep dives

Retreat for Polyamorous Individuals

A somatic therapy retreat designed for polyamorous individuals will take place on the island of Crete from March 31 to April 3, 2025. The retreat aims to support attendees who may be struggling to align their emotional responses with their rational acceptance of non-monogamy. Participants will have the opportunity to connect with others in similar lifestyles while engaging in therapeutic activities to foster feelings of joy, safety, and ease. The retreat is application-only, allowing for a more intimate environment conducive to personal growth and exploration.

Intro

2min

Navigating the Complexities of Approval and People-Pleasing

2min

Navigating Approval and People Pleasing

10min

Navigating the Desire for Approval: Extroversion, Introversion, and Approval Addiction

4min

Understanding Approval Addiction

8min

The Pursuit of Approval in Relationships

11min

The Dual Nature of Approval Seeking in Relationships

3min

Navigating the Balance of Approval and Self-Worth

4min

Disconnecting for Self-Discovery

12min

Today we're talking about the need for approval many of us feel every day and the impact it can have on our relationships. We're discussing what approval-seeking and people-pleasing are, whether seeking approval is always harmful in a relationship, pros and cons of seeking approval, and more. As always, we'll also share some actionable tools at the end of the episode to increase self-esteem, reduce anxiety, and keep relationships healthy and happy.

Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com. We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community.

Get 20% off your first order of the world's smartest cat litter at prettylitter.com/multiamory with promo code MULTIAMORY

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

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