Think Faster and Talk Smarter to Impress Anyone | Matt Abrahams
Nov 6, 2023
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Matt Abrahams, a leading communication expert, discusses thinking fast and talking smart. He shares strategies to manage anxiety, the power of using structure in spontaneous speaking, and the art of small talk.
Small talk can lead to deeper conversations and meaningful relationships.
Recognizing and managing anxiety is crucial for improving communication skills.
Being a good listener is essential for effective communication and building better relationships.
Deep dives
Small talk is an opportunity to connect
Small talk is often seen as a mundane and unimportant part of conversation, but it is actually an opportunity to build connections and find common ground. By being genuinely interested in the other person and asking questions, small talk can lead to deeper conversations and meaningful relationships.
Managing anxiety in communication
Anxiety often hinders our ability to communicate effectively, especially in spontaneous situations. Recognizing and managing anxiety is crucial to improving our communication skills. This can include techniques such as mindfulness, purposeful movement, and reframing our thoughts to reduce self-criticism.
The importance of listening
Being a good listener is essential for effective communication. Slowing down, creating mental and physical space, and showing grace by truly paying attention to the speaker's words, tone, and context are important aspects of active listening. By being present and engaged, we can connect better with others and improve our relationships.
The power of storytelling
Storytelling is a powerful tool for effective communication. Our brains are wired for stories, so structuring our ideas in a logical and engaging narrative can help our messages resonate with others. Using frameworks and asking questions can enhance our storytelling skills and make our messages more memorable and impactful.
Turning small talk into meaningful conversations
Small talk doesn't have to be mundane or awkward. By reframing our mindset and approach, we can turn small talk into meaningful conversations. Being curious, using open-ended questions, and actively listening can help us connect deeply with others and find common ground.
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In today’s episode, we cover thinking fast and talking smarter with Matt Abrahams. Matt is a leading communication expert with decades of experience as an educator, author, and coach. As a Lecturer at Stanford University's Graduate School of Business, he teaches popular classes on strategic communication and effective virtual presenting. He hosts the award-winning podcast Think Fast, Talk Smart, and is the author of the book Speaking Up without Freaking Out, as well as his newest book Think Faster, Talk Smarter: How to Speak Successfully When You're Put on the Spot.
Being able to think on your feet in every conversation can yield life-changing opportunities and relationships, so how does maximizing mediocrity better prepare you to think on your feet, what is the 3 step framework to listening so you know how to respond, and what is the secret to gracefully exiting any conversation so you avoid awkward goodbyes?
What to Listen For
Introduction – 0:00
What is the anxiety spiral and how does it trip you up in critical moments?
What 3 ways does anxiety manifest and how do you deal with each one so they don’t trip you up in important conversations?
This common practice works against you – 9:59
What is scripting and why should you avoid it if you want to make a great first impression?
How do you communicate effectively when people’s attention spans are still on the decline?
Having this mindset makes communication effortless – 22:41
Why is storytelling important when it comes to communicating and building relationships, and how do you get better at telling stories?
What 3 simple questions can you ask yourself to provide the perfect response to any communication?
The secret to make small talk impactful when it counts – 31:39
How do you make small talk fun and meaningful for everyone you talk to so it leads to better relationships and more opportunities?
What is the “white flag” trick to leave any conversation without making it awkward?
How to fix a mistake when mis-speaking in a crucial moment – 44:16
What should you do if you make a mistake in an important conversation or presentation? How do you acknowledge it without making the situation worse?