Marshall Goldsmith, a world-renowned executive coach and bestselling author, shares insights on the complexities of empathy in leadership. He discusses the benefits and pitfalls of different types of empathy, revealing how too much can hinder decision-making. Goldsmith introduces the concept of singular empathy, which helps leaders stay present despite busy lives. He encourages listeners to ask themselves, "Am I being the person I want to be right now?" This thought-provoking discussion blends personal growth with meaningful leadership practices.
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insights INSIGHT
Four Types of Empathy
Empathy has four types: understanding, feeling, caring, and acting.
Each type has potential downsides, like manipulation or burnout.
question_answer ANECDOTE
Budweiser and Empathy
Budweiser uses empathy of understanding in their ads with dogs and horses.
They understand viewers' motivations better than the viewers themselves.
question_answer ANECDOTE
Empathy and Burnout
Dr. Frias, head of Rady Children's Hospital, initially cried every night.
He learned to manage empathy of feeling to avoid burnout.
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In 'The Earned Life,' Marshall Goldsmith offers a practical approach to achieving fulfillment and minimizing regret. The book emphasizes the importance of living in the present and aligning daily choices, risks, and efforts with a broader life purpose, regardless of the eventual outcome. Goldsmith provides various strategies, including the 'Every Breath Paradigm,' the 'Action, Ambition, and Aspiration' model, and the 'credibility matrix,' to help readers shed obstacles to fulfillment and avoid the trap of existential regret. The book is divided into two parts: 'Choosing Your Life' and 'Earning Your Life,' covering both the theory and practice of living an earned life.
The Coaching Habit
Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever
Michael Bungay Stanier
In 'The Coaching Habit,' Michael Bungay Stanier provides a straightforward and effective approach to coaching. Drawing on his extensive experience training managers worldwide, he introduces seven essential coaching questions designed to help managers unlock their team's potential. These questions include the Kickstart Question, the AWE Question, the Lazy Question, the Strategic Question, the Focus Question, the Foundation Question, and the Learning Question. The book emphasizes the importance of saying less and asking more, fostering a collaborative and empowering work environment. It combines practical advice with research in neuroscience and behavioral economics, making coaching a daily, informal part of managerial work rather than a formal event.
Marshall Goldsmith: The Earned Life
Marshall Goldsmith is one of the world’s leading executive coaches and the New York Times bestselling author of many books, including What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, Mojo, and Triggers. In his coaching practice, he has advised more than 150 major CEOs and their management teams, including clients like Alan Mulally, Frances Hesselbein, and Hubert Joly. His newest book is The Earned Life: Lose Regret, Choose Fulfillment*.
We’ve all heard about the benefits of empathy and most of us assume that more empathy for the people we lead is always better. In this conversation, Marshall and I look at the different types of empathy and explore the downsides of leaning into empathy too much. Plus, we discuss how singular empathy can help busy leaders stay present in the midst of their busy schedules.
Key Points
There are multiple types of empathy — and each of them bring challenges along with their positive attributes.
We often hit the reset button successfully at work, but then neglect it in our personal relationships.
Singular empathy helps us to stay present with people and to move between the multiple spaces and situations that most leaders find themselves in daily.
A key question for us all to ask ourselves: am I being the person I want to be right now?
Resources Mentioned
The Earned Life: Lose Regret, Choose Fulfillment* by Marshall Goldsmith
Interview Notes
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Related Episodes
The Way to Stop Rescuing People From Their Problems, with Michael Bungay Stanier (episode 284)
Getting Better at Empathy, with Daniel Goleman (episode 391)
The Way to Be More Self-Aware, with Tasha Eurich (episode 442)
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