Devorah Heitner, author of Growing up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World, joins Jessi Hempel for a conversation about kids' use of social media and its effects on their mental health. They discuss teaching children genuine friendship, the benefits of online communities, navigating the social media landscape, and the impact of social media on future opportunities.
Social media can negatively impact kids' mental health by blurring the line between real friendships and online followers, and amplifying the need for social affirmation.
Establishing limits, modeling healthy technology use, and creating tech-free spaces in the home are essential in ensuring balanced screen time and promoting activities like reading or sleeping.
Deep dives
The Impact of Social Media on Kids' Mental Health
The podcast episode discusses the increasing concern about kids' mental health and the role of social media in contributing to the issue. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy's declaration of a youth mental health crisis in America is mentioned, with emphasis on social media as a major contributor. The importance of teaching young people the distinction between real friendships and online followers is highlighted, along with the impact of social media on teenagers' need for social affirmation. Examples of balancing social media with real-life connections and building a sense of purpose are provided as potential solutions.
Setting Boundaries with Technology Use
The podcast explores the significance of establishing limits and modeling healthy technology use for kids. It emphasizes the importance of creating spaces in the home that are free from distractions, such as phones, and promoting activities like reading or sleeping before resorting to constant phone use. The need to define boundaries between work and personal life and demonstrating the ability to disconnect from technology is also discussed. Different approaches to setting limits for screen time through the use of parental controls or allowing access only to specific features are mentioned.
Navigating Mistakes and Learning from Them
The episode delves into the topic of allowing kids to make mistakes on social media and helping them navigate through those errors. The significance of creating a culture of repair and forgiveness is emphasized, encouraging communities to support both the targeted group and the individual who made the mistake. The importance of character development and aligning online behavior with one's values is highlighted. The discussion also touches upon long-term implications and the need for education regarding responsible online behavior, while also acknowledging the unfairness of judging a person's character solely based on their past online actions.
Timing and Gradual Approach to Introducing Phones
The podcast episode addresses the question of when to introduce a child to their own phone. It suggests considering independent milestones, such as the child's ability to make their own lunch or interact with friends, as well as assessing when they may need a phone for communication purposes. The need for gradually introducing technology and teaching responsible online behavior through simple devices like watches or limited texting is discussed. The importance of mentoring and being on the same page as parents and other adults regarding rules and boundaries is emphasized. It concludes by emphasizing the significance of considering each child's readiness and avoiding introducing phones during busy or inconvenient times for parents.
These days it feels like kids come out of the womb glued to a screen. The term “iPad Kid” has been coined on TikTok – ironically another addictive piece of technology – to describe toddlers who seem to always have a tablet in tow. Even with kids’ programming and parental controls, it still feels nearly impossible to shield children from the challenges of the internet. Devorah Heitner tackles this subject in her latest book, Growing up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World. In this special bonus episode, Jessi and Devorah have a conversation about kids’ use of social media and its effects on their mental health.