Attachment Theory Beyond Therapy: Seth Allison on Wisdom and Connection

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Nov 8, 2023

Seth Allison, a practicing psychotherapist, joins Dr. John Vervaeke to discuss attachment theory, Internal Family Systems (IFS), and their impact on mental health and relationships. They explore secure and anxious attachments, the influence of attachment styles on parenting, and the role of attachment theory in therapy. The conversation also delves into dialogical practices, wisdom cultivation, and the emotional and physiological aspects of human bonding.

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INSIGHT

Infant Hunger and Attachment

Infants experience hunger as physical pain, not conceptually.
Secure attachment builds trust in internal signals and the soothing power of relationships.

INSIGHT

Attachment as Information Processing

Attachment is not dependence, but an information processing system.
It involves feeling bodily sensations, symbolizing them outwardly, and receiving a response.

INSIGHT

Attachment Paradox

Secure attachment promotes optimal risk-taking and worldly engagement, not dependence.
It fosters trust in one's internal signals and the availability of a secure base.

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Dr. John Vervaeke engages in an in-depth conversation with Seth Allison, a practicing psychotherapist, to discuss attachment theory, Internal Family Systems (IFS), and their implications for mental health and relationships. The two experts start off by exploring Seth's personal journey into psychotherapy and the influences that led him to attachment theory. As they unravel the nuances of secure and anxious attachments, the pair also discuss the impact of attachment styles on relationships, parenting, and mental health interventions. With Seth sharing personal struggles and professional insights, the episode becomes an enlightening blend of narrative and knowledge. The conversation ventures into the realms of dialogical practices and wisdom cultivation, touching upon the emotional and physiological aspects of human bonding.

Resources

John Vervaeke: Website | Patreon | Facebook | X | YouTube

Seth Allison: Grow Collective | LinkedIn

The Vervaeke Foundation

Workshops

Wise Attachment – Sunday, November 12th, 2023 – 10:00am to 12:00pm EST – Event and Registration Link: https://awakentomeaning.com/event/wise-attachment/

IFS Workshop – Sunday, December 10th, 2023 – 10:00am to 12:00pm EST – Event and Registration Link: https://awakentomeaning.com/event/ifs-workshop/

Books

Assessing Adult Attachment: A Dynamic-Maturational Approach to Discourse Analysis - Patricia McKinsey Crittenden, Andrea Landini

Timecodes

00:00:00 — Dr. John Vervaeke introduces Seth Allison and sets the stage for the episode.

00:01:01 — Seth shares his journey into psychotherapy and its influences.

00:08:38 — Seth discusses the concept of an infant's experience of hunger.

00:10:00 — Introduction to the three steps of understanding attachment theory.

00:16:20 — A deep dive into the concept of information processing in attachment.

00:20:29 — Vervaeke highlights the cultural misconceptions surrounding attachment as dependence.

00:30:15 — Seth Allison describes the emotional regulation between a mother and her child.

00:35:40 — Discussion on disconnection from internal data in children.

00:40:30 — John Vervaeke shares his personal realization of having an anxious attachment style.

00:43:20 — Seth gives a practical example of attachment anxiety in relationships.

00:51:40 — Discussion on how culture can misreward attachment strategies.

00:54:58 — Seth opens up about his personal struggles with mental health.

00:57:40 — Seth talks about the change in his approach to therapy.

01:03:40 — The conversation ventures into Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT).

01:09:18 — John introduces the concept of false normativity.

01:12:10 — Exploring the role of relationships in personal growth.

01:14:00 — Announcement of a Part 2 episode focusing on dialogical practices.

01:19:00 — Vervaeke hints at a future discussion about ally work and IFS.