In this raw and refreshing podcast, the host and her son tackle topics like anxiety, peer pressure, bullying, and body image. They discuss strategies for supporting teens and 20-somethings, including how to encourage young men to open up and deal with anger. The debate of giving kids cell phones is explored, along with tips for making friends in a new school and overcoming challenges in the teenage years.
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Quick takeaways
Parents should have open conversations about anxiety with their teenagers and seek professional help if necessary.
Friend groups are more inclusive and accepting compared to cliques, and choosing friends based on trust and authenticity is crucial.
Limiting phone use for teenagers can help them appreciate life beyond their devices, and getting a phone can be allowed around the age of 16.
Deep dives
Understanding the Teenage Mind: Insights from an 18-Year-Old
In this podcast episode, the host invites her 18-year-old son to discuss the challenges and experiences of teenagers and young adults. They address topics such as communication barriers between parents and sons, social hierarchies in schools, and the importance of finding genuine friendships. The son shares insights on how boys process emotions and the pressure to conform to masculine ideals. They also discuss strategies for parents to support their teens, including giving them freedom while still enforcing responsibilities and chores. The episode offers advice on handling anxiety and the importance of seeking help and understanding for mental health struggles.
Navigating Social Dynamics and Clicky Behavior at School
This segment of the podcast explores the challenges of fitting in and navigating social dynamics in school, specifically focusing on the difference between friend groups and cliques. The son provides insights on the exclusive and judgmental nature of cliques and how friend groups tend to be more inclusive and accepting. He emphasizes the importance of choosing friends based on trust and authenticity rather than social standing. The hosts also discuss strategies for helping children deal with hurtful comments and exclusion, including responding with humor and building resilience.
Supporting Teens with Anxiety and Chores
The podcast addresses the common struggles parents face when dealing with teenagers who have anxiety and resistance towards chores. The son advises parents to have open conversations about anxiety and seek professional help if necessary. The importance of medication, therapy, and coping strategies is stressed. The discussion also centers around effective ways to approach teenagers about chores, such as asking for help while acknowledging their need for freedom and control. The episode encourages parents to be there for their children, communicate their support, and help rehearse comebacks for handling hurtful comments.
The importance of limiting phone use for teenagers
In the podcast episode, the host discusses the topic of whether or not teenagers should have cell phones. The guest argues that it is important to limit phone use for teenagers, as technology often consumes our lives. They suggest that delaying the age at which teenagers get a phone can help them appreciate life beyond their devices. The guest recommends allowing teenagers to have a phone around the age of 16, when they are also allowed to have a car.
The value of participating in class and finding one's people
Another topic discussed in the podcast is the importance of participating in class and making friends. The guest emphasizes that participation in class shows attentiveness and contributes to a better learning experience. They suggest taking drama classes, as they teach confidence and public speaking. The guest also encourages students to get involved in clubs and activities outside of class, as this can lead to finding like-minded individuals. They advise not to worry if the first person you meet does not become your best friend, as it takes time to find your people.
Lately, I’ve been getting a ton of questions from listeners about how to best support high schoolers and 20-somethings. There are lots of questions about anxiety, peer pressure, and getting young adults to open up.
So, in this episode, I have a pile of your questions in front of me as my son, Oakley, and I go through them rapid-fire style, so you get both of our perspectives on the topics everyone worries about but is too afraid to talk about.
I have to say, Oakley really showed up for this conversation for you. He has hilarious and heartfelt thoughts on topics he has first-hand experience with.
We cover it all. From academic pressure to body image to bullying, this conversation is full of tools and strategies and is raw, unfiltered, and filled with relatable stories (and only a few f-bombs).
You will learn:
What teens and 20-somethings really need (and don’t need) from their parents.
(If you only get one thing from this episode, make it this…) How to encourage the young men in your life to open up.
The ONLY thing you need to do when your young adults come home in a bad mood.
How to get unhooked from toxic popularity and cliques and find your people in school or in life.
3 smart strategies to use when your child is getting bullied that will strengthen your bond with your kid.
An 18-year-old's surprising take on when to give your kid a cellphone.
The must-use hacks for introverts who want to be more confident in school.
How to get your kid to do chores (and still like you).
Strategies for handling your kid’s anxiety without yelling or freaking out.
The best way to navigate curfews and late-night parties with your teen.
I can’t wait for you to hear this. I loved the questions and the advice. And as a mom, I couldn’t be more proud of Oak for how much wisdom he shared.
I’d love for you to listen with your teens and 20-somethings. In fact, at the end of the episode, Oakley gives specific advice (including exactly what to say) to get your kids to listen.
Xo, Mel
In this episode, you’ll learn:
1:20: Why is it so hard to get my teen to open up to me?
4:00: Your kids need quiet time at these two times of the day.
7:22: Here’s what to say to start a conversation with your child.
9:30: How should your kids handle clique groups?
11:00: How can you tell who "your" people are?
12:15: Three strategies to help your kid deal with hurtful behaviors.
17:30: What teens need (and don’t need) from their parents.
21:45: At what age do you think your teen should have a phone?
23:30: My high school senior has no idea what she wants to major in.
26:00: Two best hacks for introverted teens everywhere.
28:45: How can you help your kids find their friends?
34:00: My teen is a senior in high school, but he still has chores at home.
36:30: Oakley gives you a peek into his own anxiety to help your anxious teen.
41:20: How do you reassure your kid when he’s dyslexic?
42:45: The gold-standard tutoring program we used to help Oakley with his dyslexia.
44:20: Two simple hacks that have made a big difference for Oakley in school.
45:30: The two qualities I think of first when it comes to curfews.
47:00: Here was my #1 desire for my Vermont home when it came to my kids.
49:40: I literally sat Oakley’s friends down and laid down two rules for hanging out.
52:40: So how do you get your teen to listen to this interview?