Relationships are like a dance. You can't change the other person's moves, but if you change yours, they might change too. In therapy, people often want the other person to change first, but it's better to focus on changing yourself. When couples come to therapy, I encourage them to think about what they can do differently in the relationship without expecting the other person to change. It's about being your best self and seeing what happens when you show up in a different way.
Lori Gottlieb believes we all have an inner narrator. In this episode, she explains why the story you tell yourself is key to your happiness (or lack thereof). She also discusses the stages of change, why relationships are a dance, and the steps to finding a good therapist that can help you edit the story of your life. Lori is a therapist, the bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, and a co-host on the Dear Therapists podcast. She was once also an executive at NBC, overseeing shows like the hit medical drama ER. It’s through these varied experiences that she’s realized the power of being aware of your personal narrative and being willing to edit your story.
For the full text transcript, visit go.ted.com/BHTranscripts