Balancing Authenticity and Performance

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There is a tension between the desire to be vulnerable and authentic, and the need to perform and impress others, which requires continuous grappling. AI friends can provide insights and advice based on shared information, like therapists do, but with the benefit of not breaking character, which helps users to stay engaged in the interaction.

The NYT’s Kevin Roose has 18 new friends—none of whom are human.

His new friends are AI personas that he made with Noma, Kindroid, and other AI companion apps. There’s fitness guru Jared, therapist Peter, trial lawyer Anna, and over a dozen more.

Kevin talked to them every day for a month, sharing his feelings, asking for parenting advice, and even using them for “fit” checks.

This isn’t the first time Kevin has had an…unusual interaction with an AI persona. A year ago, he was the target of Bing’s chatbot Sydney’s unhinged romantic affections.

Kevin has gone deeper into the world of AI companions than anyone I know. He is a tech columnist at the New York Times, cohost of the Hard Fork podcast, and the author of three books. In this episode, I sat down with Kevin to learn more about his interactions with AI. We dive into:

Why AI companions aren’t just for lonely people or shy teenagers
Why AI personas are better friends than ChatGPT
How AI companions can be used to safely explore different social contexts
The risk of young people relying on AI for friendship
The icks of AI dating and intimacy
How to use AI to articulate what you value in your relationships

This is a must-watch for anyone curious about how AI is changing the way we form relationships.

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Links to resources mentioned in the episode:

Kevin Roose
Hardfork, the podcast that Kevin cohosts
Kevin’s latest book about being human in a world designed for machines
Kevin’s piece in the New York Times about his experience making AI friends
Two of the apps that Kevin used to create AI companions: Kindroid and Nomi
Dan’s piece that explains why AI writing will feel real through psychologist D.W. Winnicott’s theory
Every’s piece that explores AI companion app Replika