There's this principal in psychology called emotional contagion. We're going to associate those, pavlovstyle, with the people around us. So if you're having yet another night of nettle and pizza, that can get kind of boring. You are probably going to associate that with your partner. And if you want to sustain it, that needs to be a part of it. The magic sole mates thing can work against us by making us passive.
Eric Barker is not a people person. “Getting me to write a relationship book,” he says, “is like asking Godzilla to improve the infrastructure in your city.” But he did it anyway. Guided by leading social psychologists, Eric went on a journey to understand what he was getting wrong about relationships — and what he could do to turn things around. The result is “Plays Well With Others,” a guide to friendship, intimacy, loneliness, and belonging that our curator Daniel Pink says will “revitalize your life.”
THIS AND THAT:
Check out Eric’s blog, “Barking Up the Wrong Tree”
Try out Arthur Aron’s intimacy building questions
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