The Next Big Idea

RELATIONSHIPS: Why Everything You Know About Them Is (Mostly) Wrong

Jun 9, 2022

Eric Barker, author of "Plays Well With Others," delves into the quirks of relationships with humor and insight, exploring his own journey from social awkwardness to understanding. He emphasizes the true value of friendships, revealing that time spent with friends can boost happiness as much as financial gain. Barker critiques conventional relationship advice and discusses the mechanics of love, likening it to mental health. Together with Paneo Giannopoulos, they stress the importance of vulnerability, meaningful conversations, and belonging for a fulfilling life.

55:01

Episode guests

Eric Barker

Paneo Giannopoulos

Highlights

AI Chapters

Episode notes

Are We Creating a World for the Next Generation?

01:04

Friends Make Us Happier Than Anything Else

01:51

How Small Talk Degrades the Quality of a Friendship

01:16

You Fall in Love Because You Did Those Fun Things Together

01:20

Intro

5min

The Value of Friendships in Modern Life

23min

Redefining Love: Challenges and Insights

3min

The Mechanics of Love

11min

Exploring Life's Meaning Through Belonging

2min

The Importance of Belonging and Deep Connections

4min

Revitalizing Relationships Through Deeper Conversations

4min

Eric Barker is not a people person. “Getting me to write a relationship book,” he says, “is like asking Godzilla to improve the infrastructure in your city.” But he did it anyway. Guided by leading social psychologists, Eric went on a journey to understand what he was getting wrong about relationships — and what he could do to turn things around. The result is “Plays Well With Others,” a guide to friendship, intimacy, loneliness, and belonging that our curator Daniel Pink says will “revitalize your life.”

THIS AND THAT:

Check out Eric’s blog, “Barking Up the Wrong Tree”

Try out Arthur Aron’s intimacy building questions

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