Effective Strategies for Deescalating Emotions in Negotiation

In negotiation, deescalating emotions is crucial. One effective strategy is 'going to the balcony,' adopting a detached observer role to create space and perspective. Self-mastery is vital in negotiation, as influencing oneself is the first step to influencing others. Human reactions can lead to regretful actions like sending emails or texts impulsively. Taking a pause between stimulus and response, imagining negotiations on a play with a mental balcony view, helps in keeping focus on priorities and seeing the bigger picture, navigating through conflicts successfully.

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William Ury, cofounder of Harvard’s Program on Negotiation, is one of the world’s best-known experts on negotiation. He is coauthor of Getting to Yes, the all-time best selling negotiation book in the world; the author of one of my favorite books on negotiation (Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations); and author of the new book: Possible: How We Survive (and Thrive) in an Age of Conflict.

Please enjoy!

Timestamps for this episode are available below.

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Timestamps:

[00:00] Start

[06:53] Connecting with Roger Fisher.

[10:08] Devising Seminars.

[12:31] Negotiating the Camp David Accords.

[18:23] Writing the other side's victory speech.

[21:17] Writing Kim Jong-un's victory speech.

[26:20] Pondering possibilities in the modern Middle East.

[29:26] Lessons from iconic possibilist Nelson Mandela.

[32:17] Going to the balcony.

[36:11] Mitigating the risk of emotional spiraling with Hugo Chávez.

[40:50] The power of silence.