Shantal Jovia
@shantal
We Can Do Hard Things cover image

218. Kelly Clarkson: Red Flags, Divorce & Starting Over

We Can Do Hard Things

The Importance of Wanting vs Needing in Relationships

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Choosing to be with someone because you want them, not because you need them, is more impressive and powerful. There is a difference between needing and wanting someone, and it involves control, manipulation, and personal agency. Expressing that you want someone and choosing them is a beautiful thing, but it may not be enough for some people. Not everyone wants or needs to be loved in that way in a relationship. Dependency, whether it is financial or emotional, detracts from the core of a loving relationship. The focus should be on wanting, not needing, the other person.

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