Many couples struggle in their marriages because they try to replicate the functional examples of their parent's marriages, unaware that their emotional experiences with their parents have a more powerful influence. Children who witness their parent's excellent marriage but experience emotional wounds, such as feeling like outsiders in their parent's close relationship, carry these wounds into their own marriages. They seek to meet their unmet emotional needs from childhood in their current marriage, and this can heavily influence their behavior and satisfaction in the relationship.
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Episode 2004:
Dr. Kelly Flanagan delves into the essence of marriage, highlighting five core emotional needs: Connectedness, Priority, Affirmation, Equality, and Freedom. These needs, often shaped by our childhood experiences and unspoken wounds, play a crucial role in marital dynamics and personal fulfillment.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://drkellyflanagan.com/the-5-things-were-all-fighting-for-in-marriage/
Quotes to ponder:
"The great question of marriage is not: how can I act—or not act—like my parents did in their marriage? The great question is this: what emotional needs did my parents leave me with as a child, and how am I trying to get those needs met in my marriage today?"
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