
Proxy with Yowei Shaw
It’s the knot you can’t untangle - a problem so unique, it makes you feel alone. But what if you could talk to someone who’s been through the exact same thing? On Proxy, we find just the person you were looking for, the person who can help you get unstuck. It’s not therapy - it’s emotional investigative journalism™️. Yowei Shaw, former host of Invisibilia, at your service. New cases every other Tuesday. ----------Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletterFollow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com
Latest episodes

Oct 29, 2024 • 42min
Is there anything we can actually do about polarization?
Whoever wins the election, Americans will still want to rip each other's heads off. Social psychologist Jay Van Bavel helps us understand why we should care about polarization, how we got here, and what, if anything, we can do about it. From the episode:
Jay Van Bavel's book The Power of Us: Harnessing Our Shared Identities to Improve Performance, Increase Cooperation, and Promote Social Harmony
The paper on political sectarianism Jay co-wrote
Find out more about Jay Van Bavel and his work
Follow Jay on X and Instagram: @jayvanbavel
Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

Sep 26, 2024 • 24min
So many tears but what do they say?
We all know that moment - when you feel like you need to cry in front of other people, but don't want to cry. In this episode, Yowei talks to Heather Christle, the author of The Crying Book, to parse what’s happening in that moment, what tears are saying and how we should respond to them. From the episode:
Heather Christle's The Crying Book
Heather's new book In the Rhododendrums: A Memoir with Appearances by Virginia Wolf
Follow Heather on X and Instagram @heatherchristle
The Thai Life Insurance commercial from our crying experiment
Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

Sep 5, 2024 • 8min
Did we make our goal???
Finally, a campaign reveal. Did we get additional funding to hire Kim for more hours? Plus, some updates for what’s in store for Proxy. Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

Aug 21, 2024 • 24min
The Mechanics and Magic of Ritual
The final installment of Yowei's quest to solve the mystery of proxy converations. In this episode, Yowei talks to a ritual expert and tries explaining what she's learned about proxy conversations to her mom. From the episode:
Michael Norton's book The Ritual Effect: From Habit to Ritual, Harnessing the Surprising Power of Everyday Actions
Find out more about Michael and his work
Yowei's unhinged grieving ritual for her layoff
Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

Aug 15, 2024 • 40min
Psychodrama: The 2nd Oldest Psychotherapy You've Never Heard Of, But Have Definitely Tried
Part 3 of Yowei's extremely meta quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations. In this episode, Yowei learns about psychodrama, a psychotherapy that has similarities to proxy conversations and used to be a dominant modality in the U.S. and then died. Dr. Scott Giacomucci breaks down the mechanics of proxy conversations and tries his psychodrama techniques on Yowei. From the episode:
Find out more about Dr. Scott Giacomucci and his work
The Phoenix Center for Experiential Trauma Therapy
Download Scott's textbook about psychodrama for free
Follow Scott on YouTube
Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

Aug 6, 2024 • 37min
Connor Ratliff's Dead Eyes
Part 2 of Yowei's quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations. Why do they work? How? Can Yowei figure out how to explain the show to people who don't get it? In this episode, Yowei gets advice from actor, comedian, and proxy conversation expert Connor Ratliff. Over 20 years ago, Tom Hanks fired Connor from a small role in the HBO mini-series Band of Brothers - apparently for having "dead eyes." But is that really what happened? Connor made a podcast to investigate, and had 30 episodes worth of proxy conversations before talking to Tom Hanks himself. From the episode:
Follow Connor Ratliff on Instagram @connorratliff
Listen to Connor Ratliff's podcasts: Dead Eyes, Tiny Dinos, and The George Lucas Show
Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

Jul 24, 2024 • 1h 1min
The Incredible Healing Powers of Vicarious Restorative Justice
Yowei has a problem. She's having trouble explaining the show to people who don't get it. She knows proxy conversations work. But why? How? Part 1 of a 4-part quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations. Yowei learns about a proxy conversation happening in a completely different context: restorative justice with proxy survivors and offenders. From the episode:
Learn more about Dr. Alissa Ackerman and her work
Ampersands Restorative Justice
Alissa's book Healing from Sexual Violence: The Case for Vicarious Restorative Justice
Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

Jun 7, 2024 • 10min
Exploding the Myth of Meritocracy with Ofer Sharone [TEASER]
Teaser for full-length exclusive bonus episode on Patreon. An in-depth interview with UMass Amherst sociologist and professor Ofer Sharone about the stigma trap that laid off workers can fall into and how the myth of meritocracy impacts even people who don't think they believe in it. For the full bonus episode, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast. From the episode:
Learn more about Ofer Sharone and his work
Ofer's book The Stigma Trap: College-Educated, Experienced, and Long-Term Unemployed
Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon. You’ll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

May 23, 2024 • 50min
The Layoff Trilogy 3: HR by Proxy
Explore the emotional aftermath of layoffs with a music project, unresolved tension with HR, confusion around layoff processes, HR practices and personal realities, and a journey to self-financing and closure.

May 23, 2024 • 42min
The Layoff Trilogy 2: Danger Day
Ofer Sharone, an expert on workplace issues, discusses the psychological impact of layoffs with Miles and Elliot, a trans couple facing unemployment. The narrative delves into their anxieties leading up to 'danger day' at work, highlighting the emotional turmoil and uncertainties faced by those suddenly laid off.