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Dear Sugars

Latest episodes

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Mar 11, 2023 • 35min

Encore: Baby or Bust

You wants kids; your partner doesn't. Or your partner wants kids, and you don't. Whatever the scenario, few subjects are as emotionally charged and potentially deal-breaking in a relationship as a disagreement over the decision to become parents. In this favorite episode from the archives, The Sugars take on this tricky topic with the help of the writer Danielle Herzog, who's written in the past about ending her own marriage to become a mother. This episode was originally published on March 22nd, 2017.
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Feb 25, 2023 • 44min

Encore: Emotional Labor

Remembering the grocery list, coordinating with the babysitter, scheduling a get-together with the in-laws: These are some of the invisible tasks that (most) women exclusively do in their romantic relationships — and the list goes on and on. In this favorite episode from the archives, The Sugars commiserate with Gemma Hartley, the writer who set off a national conversation about emotional labor with her viral article in Harper’s Bazaar, “Women Aren’t Nags — We’re Just Fed Up.”
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Feb 11, 2023 • 30min

Encore: May-December Romances

In this favorite episode from the archives, The Sugars discuss relationships with big age gaps, so-called "May-December" romances with the help of Lucinda Franks, a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and author of the memoir Timeless: Love, Morgenthau, and Me, which tells the story of her marriage to New York District Attorney Robert Morgenthau, who's 27 years her senior. This episode was originally released October 20th, 2016.
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14 snips
Jan 28, 2023 • 34min

Encore: Should I Stay Or Go?

In this favorite episode from the archives, The Sugars bring you another "Rapid Fire" episode, where they give brief answers to a handful of letters that are all centered around a theme. The theme for this episode is "stay or go" -- people who have a voice in their head telling them to leave their relationship, but who aren't sure it's the right move. This episode was originally released on September 9, 2016. 
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11 snips
Dec 31, 2022 • 27min

Encore: How Do I Find The Courage To Be My Own Guide?

The Sugars often discuss letters dealing with very specific problems or struggles. In this encore episode, they take on a broader, more existential question: how to follow your heart. The Sugars discuss with the GRAMMY-winning singer/songwriter India Arie, who shares how she learned to be her own guide. This episode was originally released September 23rd, 2016.
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Dec 17, 2022 • 46min

Encore: Pet Dilemmas

This encore episode is all about adventures in animal ownership! The Sugars, along with Julie Barton — author of the memoir "Dog Medicine: How My Dog Saved Me From Myself" — answer letters about pet dilemmas and the ways these creatures affect human relationships. This episode was originally published on August 26th, 2017.
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Dec 3, 2022 • 39min

Encore: I'm A Transgender Man, Seeking Acceptance

The Sugars read the letters of two transgender men who are struggling to find love and acceptance. They discuss with Cooper Lee Bombardier, a visual artist, writer and transgender man. This episode was originally aired on September 2, 2016.
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Nov 19, 2022 • 41min

Encore: Who's Your Daddy?

When Steve Lickteig turned 18, he learned that his mother and father, who he thought were his adoptive parents, are in fact his biological grandparents. With the advent of affordable DNA testing and companies like 23andMe, more and more people are having revelations like Mr. Lickteig’s. For some, these revelations can be a welcome and exciting discovery process. For others, they’re shocking and unwanted. In today’s episode, Mr. Lickteig shares his story and helps the Sugars advise letter writers who are still reeling from their genetic discoveries. This episode was originally aired on June 16, 2018.
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Nov 3, 2022 • 26min

Encore: I'm In Love With My Abuser

For the first time on the podcast, the Sugars answer a voice mail message from the Dear Sugars hotline. The message comes from a woman who reunited with her ex-boyfriend, who once assaulted her. Wracked with shame, she wonders if reconciling with him is acceptable and if it’s possible he’ll change. Esta Soler, president and founder of Futures Without Violence, joins the Sugars to help answer the question: Is it O.K. to love someone who abused you? This episode was originally released on April 21, 2018.
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Oct 22, 2022 • 43min

Encore: Moving On, Part 2

In this second part of our series on moving on, the Sugars discuss how we can release ourselves from our past mistakes. Dr. Harriet Lerner drops in to answer a letter from a woman who calls herself a "serial codependent," as well as a woman who is haunted by her abortion. This episode was originally published on August 25th, 2018.

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