The Suzanne Venker Show

Expert on Childhood Emotional Neglect, Erica Komisar, discusses the damaging effects of childhood emotional neglect. The absence of emotional support in childhood can lead to suppressed emotions in adulthood, causing havoc in relationships. The podcast explores attachment patterns, the impact of emotional neglect on individuals, raising resilient adolescence, expanding the definition of mental illness, understanding anxiety, and the connection between anxiety and depression.

Have you been told that science is sexist? Or that being obese is healthy, that there is no such thing as biological sex, or that only white people can be racist? Are you confused by these ideas, and do you wonder how they have managed so quickly to challenge the very logic of Western society? James Lindsay is a mathematician, an author and cultural critic known for his involvement in the grievance studies affair with two of his colleagues, one of whom he co-authored the book, Cynical Theories: How Activist Scholarship Made Everything about Race, Gender, and Identity—and Why This Harms Everybody. The book is Wall Street Journal, USA Today, and Publishers Weekly Bestseller! James calls the social justice movement his “ideological enemy” and is a major critic of wokeness. He and I are going to talk today about the evolution of the dogma that informs woke ideas such as the idea that science and reason are tools of oppression; all human interactions are sites of oppressive power play; and language is dangerous. Obviously we’ll be covering cancel culture as well. IN THIS EPISODE: 3:30  What is Critical Theory? What is Critical Race Theory? 5:05  The 3 components that define critical theory are: it must be the normative vision of a perfected society; it must explain how the current society does not live up to that vision; and it must be applicable by social activists 7:10  The goal is to make people dissatisfied with their society by pointing out that is not perfect and building social activism built around that 9:28  Suzanne and James discuss “Critical Gender Theory” and how that relates to gender studies 12:10  The argument is that capitalism and free societies are “oppressive” and that we need to be liberated from them 13:00  Millennials are the main generation that have fallen for the “woke” mentality 14:35  Gen Z is less woke than millennials 16:15   Suzanne and James discuss Megan Markle and Prince Harry 18:00  The elite class are the ones propagating the “wokeness” we’re seeing in society 21:00  Many people are wounded from childhood and take this victimhood into adulthood and project this onto society 24:10  There is a deliberate grooming of young women to be paranoid 25:00  Suzanne and James discuss “rape culture” 30:50  We are attracted to what gives us a positive reward and repelled away from things we get negative feedback for 33:35  You get rewarded for being a part of the “system” 34:00  James talks about his political leanings, how he considers himself a liberal, and how he voted Republican for the first time in the more recent election 36:00  James talks  about his work and how he became known for writing and submitting “fake” papers to expose how “woke” academia has become 43:00 James talks about how he was “found out” by journalists at The Wall Street Journal 48:40   Academia has become corrupted and is indoctrinating students 49:00  Suzanne and James discuss “cancel culture”: Dr. Seuss, etc. 50:00  What should traditionally employed people push back against woke corporate culture without losing their jobs?

Roy Baumeister is a social psychologist who explores how we think about the self, and why we feel and act the way we do. He's one of the world’s most prolific and influential psychologists who has published well over 500 scientific articles and more than 30 books. In 2013, he received the highest award given by the Association for Psychological Science, the William James Fellow award, in recognition of his lifetime achievements. Roy's 2010 book, Is There Anything Good About Men? offers provocative answers to questions such as: Have men really been engaged in a centuries-old conspiracy to exploit and oppress women? Have the essential differences between men and women really been erased? Have men now become unnecessary? Are they good for anything at all? Ultimately, he argues that relations between men and women are now and have always been more cooperative than antagonistic, that men and women are different in basic ways, and that successful cultures capitalize on these differences to outperform rival cultures. Still, he shows that while men have greatly benefited from the culture they have created, they have also suffered because of it. IN THIS EPISODE: 5:00  Men and women  are not enemies of each other and have always worked together since the beginning of time 9:00  Men never “banded” together to oppress women. There is no evidence of this 12:00  “Inequality” emerged because of the psychological differences and strengths of men and women 13:50  Differences are rooted in trade-offs. You solve one problem and create another 14:30 Women are better than men at some things and vice versa. It’s implausible that evolution would make one gender “better” than the other. 15:40  Suzanne and Roy discuss the motivations and desires of men and women in regards to their abilities 17:15  The mean IQ of men and women is almost identical 17:50  Men and women are different when it comes to sex. Women cannot fathom the strength of the male sex drive 22:50  Women have a stronger desire to bear and raise children than men. The mother-child bond is universal, whereas the father child bond varies widely historically and culturally 23:30  A woman's sex drive changes over time. 24:30  Roy talks about his research of sex drives during the first five years of marriage 27:00  It’s much harder for women to know their own sexuality because it's a moving target 28:45  Roy explains the lie of the “glass ceiling” 29:50  The gender pay gap exists for a reason and it’s not because of discrimination or oppression on the whole; it has to do with the difference of desires between men and women when it comes to work 20:45  Men are more competitive by nature than women 33:50 Monogamy benefits low status men

Modern dating is depicted as a disaster, with many young women misled by cultural narratives about love and relationships. The emotional weight of casual sex is explored, emphasizing that it's not as detached for women as it is often portrayed. Valuable advice includes getting a flexible degree and marrying someone with a clear career path before starting a family. Cohabitation challenges are discussed, revealing differing motives between men and women. Ultimately, the conversation calls for community support and honest discussions to empower the next generation.

Katy Faust, author of 'Them Before Us' and a passionate advocate for children's rights, discusses the crucial need for children to be raised by both a mother and a father. She highlights the three emotional staples essential for a child’s well-being and challenges the notion that love alone can suffice in parenting. Katy addresses the societal shifts around marriage and reproductive technologies, boldly asserting that children’s needs are often overshadowed by adult desires. Her insights aim to reshape family discussions by prioritizing children's rights.

Believe it or not, many men today are just as interested in having a happy marriage as are women, and they’re actually great at becoming true partners in creating a great marriage. But: they need guidance. Too many men grew up in homes where a father was absent physically or emotionally. As a result, men often have faulty beliefs about what makes for a good marriage. In The Essential Guide for The Married Man, E. Paul Allerton provides the kind of wisdom many men wish they had gotten from a loving and knowledgeable father or grandfather. At the end of the day, navigating a successful marriage and a meaningful life comes down to your ability to lead yourself and then your ability to lead your family based on your actions. A man’s purpose determines the qualities of character he must develop. In order to serve his purpose, he must consciously choose and master the attitude and self-discipline necessary to navigate the storms of life. Paul Allerton is Director of www.themarriedman.net, a site providing men with resources to be great husbands and fathers. Over the past 25 years, Paul has coached hundreds of men, restoring dozens of marriages to thriving and loving relationships. He has been married for more than 35 years and has six children. IN THIS EPISODE: 6:50  Suzanne reads an email from a listener who wants her man to step up 9:25  60% of men grow up without fathers in the house or their fathers “go along to get along” 11:00  Paul talks about his own marriage of 37 years, raising six children, growing up in a broken home 12:25  #1: Know where you are going and what you are doing, in your life and career 15:00  Life is not about being happy; it’s about what you can give and contribute 15:30  American men lack purpose 16:10  Suzanne and Paul discuss the Boy Scouts and why it was so good for building strong men 18:30  Suzanne and Paul discuss the Attitude Assessment Tool The Quitter: “It's someone else's fault, and I’m not going to do anything about it” Procrastinators: A lot of modern men are procrastinators Along for the ride: They are not causing problems, but they are waiting for their wives to tell them what to do. They’re not doing damage, but they're irrelevant. 21:00  Never use any one action or inaction as an excuse for your own shortcomings 22:00  The moment a woman steps in to do a man’s job, the man will back up and let her 22:37  Doubt will paralyze a man 23:00  A man’s career is not a privilege; it is their way to provide and protect. Women have lost the appreciation for that 23:45  After mastering your attitude and doing what they need to do, despite whether they want to.  Men also should have a daily discipline. Any muscle that you exercise will get stronger. 26:20  Purpose can be as simple as just wanting to provide and protect your family 27:20  Parents are responsible. Parents are acting like children expecting their children to act like adults 40:30  Women who are scared control their environment 41:10  Almost 100% of the time women nag, control and yell it's because of FEAR 43:30  Men care deeply and make huge sacrifices because they care 43:40  Worry about yourself and your wife to become soft. Focus on being disciplined, committed and generous. AND MORE!

Uncover three unconventional life choices that may lead to true success. Choosing a career based on future family plans can pave the way for fulfillment. Marrying younger offers opportunities for deep connection and growth. Financial decisions benefit from focusing on a single income, allowing for greater stability. Listen in as the importance of mindful, purposeful living is emphasized, challenging societal norms and encouraging a long-term perspective on life and love!

"Women have been acculturated to believe they should be their own heroes. Women's television delivers this message over and over again with movies in which, at most, one good man might provide some small assistance as the heroine rescues herself." Those are the words of "Claudia," the wise grandmother who tutors her granddaughter Kimberlee in the art of loving a man in The Queen's Code. The Queen's Code is a fictionalized version of the days when author Alison Armstrong was what she calls a "frog farmer," or a woman who brings out the worst in men by turning her prince into a frog. It offers a LIFE-CHANGING view of men that will turn your marriage or relationship around overnight. Alison Armstrong is a best-selling author, sought after speaker and a master thought leader. She’s the founder of PAX Programs, a mission driven company passionate about transforming the way men and women relate to themselves and each other and the ultimate source for understanding men and women. Her website is www.understandmen.com. "Until we understand the real differences in what compels our behavior, especially under stress, we'll keep bringing out the worst in each other. And never experience the real beauty of both men and women." — Alison Armstrong IN THIS EPISODE: Modern women antagonize the most primitive aspects of men. Being successful in love requires an attitude adjustment. Anger and self-righteousness have got to go. When you emasculate your man, it causes him to treat you with disdain. The emasculating of men is a knee-jerk response out of fear of men's power. It's a learned behavior to reduce men's pressure, and it is the only way women have to deal with their hurt, disappointment and frustration. How Women Emasculate Men: Withhold appreciation • Withhold admiration • Withhold sex • Don't let them impress you • Compare unfavorably–be impressed by someone else • Don't trust them • Don't need them for anything important to you If you’re not using your assets to emasculate, he will naturally appreciate your beauty, sexuality, intellect, humor, needs, etc. If he can keep his power, he will not be overwhelmed by yours. He will not be triggered to objectify you. Everything about women can overwhelm men. Men are nurtured—literally fed energy—by being in the presence of a contented woman. Reducing male power doesn’t make women safer. The makeup of the masculine brain causes it to focus on one result. It commits itself to the accomplishment of that result and screens out everything that's unrelated. This is virtually the opposite of the feminine brain. There’s a difference bw depending on a man to provide and allowing him to. Most women won't let a man provide for them; they want to be the provider instead. It's a standoff of dueling providers, and a man can't give way without being emasculated.

In this podcast episode, Suzanne shares letters from readers and listeners. 3:00  Suzanne reads an email from Ashley, a left-leaning listener/reader who has a PhD, lives in a big city and was on the verge of divorce. Feeling like she had no other options, she started reading Suzanne’s books, tried out her theory and saw immediate changes in her marriage 8:00  The most receptive people to Suzanne’s message have typically been married awhile 8:35  Silence is so powerful. You have a choice about how to respond when your partner is in a bad mood or snaps at you. 9:00  Suzanne reads a message from Pablo, a married man, who delineates between a conservative woman's approach to sex vs. a “modern” woman's approach to sex. 12:30  Suzanne reads a message from Joel who discusses the idea that life “ends” with marriage. In the modern discussion about marriage, all the real “fun” is to be had when you’re single and “free,” which is in part why marriage itself is in decline 14:00  The meaning of marriage and why it is NOT the end of your “fun life” 15:00  The different stages of marriage 17:50  Suzanne reads an email from Christine who read all of Suzanne’s books and explains how she was inspired to save her relationship with her five-year partner. 19:28  Suzanne reads an email from Victor, a podcast listener, who asks questions regarding the downfall of traditional roles, sexual attraction and intimacy 20:55  To cope with marital conflicts/problems, you’re always better off moving with the biological tide 22:20  Keeping the masculine and feminine dynamic leads to high sexual attraction 23:15  Suzanne reads an email from a woman who read her eBook How to be A Wife and how it affected her and how she was holding on to behaviors that don’t work and how the book transformed her life 25:50  Suzanne describes why being open to change can rock your world 26:54  Suzanne reads an email from a stay-at-home mom who struggles with validation 29:36  Suzanne reads an email from Chad, who says he sees many men giving up on marriage and relationships and how many women these days are promiscuous, masculine and immature. He asks Suzanne her thoughts on what’s happening with women in the culture. 33:11  Suzanne reads a letter from a 26-year-old married woman who wants to start a family but is the breadwinner 34:00  Why getting married later and having kids all at once is more stressful

A lot of men want to be good guys. But Elliott Katz, author of Being the Strong Man A Woman Wants: Timeless wisdom on being a man, says a lot of what men are doing, thinking it makes them good guys, actually makes women lose respect for them. To help these men understand why, Elliott and Suzanne discuss the top 5 things men mistakenly do thinking it makes them good guys. IN THIS EPISODE: 4:00  Many good husbands don't understand why their wives are so frustrated with them 4:40  Elliott's own marriage, subsequent divorce and journey to learn what it means to be a man in a relationship 6:40  Young men look to their fathers for wisdom and guidance 9:00  Men need to learn how to show their share of leadership in their home 10:00  Why always leaving the making plans to her is a mistake 13:20  It’s not natural for women to be in control all the time 14:30  Why it’s a mistake not to offer to pay on the first date 20:00  Why, as a  man, saying “whatever you want; you decide” doesn't work 22:00  What men should do when their woman shoots down all of their ideas 29:00  A lot of men think they can’t lead if their wives don’t let them **29:50  Stand up to your wife when she treats you badly. There is no conversation about this in the culture about this since it’s unpopular and typically the focus is on women being treated badly. 32:40  Men need to let their wives know what kind of treatment they won’t accept and most men are concerned with “keeping the peace." Women do not respect men who don't have a backbone 35:55  Takeaways for men: Take the lead, be a man with a plan, take initiative, show leadership, cast the deciding vote, tell her behavior is unacceptable