Finding You: by Dr. Brad Reedy

Dr. Reedy travels back in time to present a parent seminar he would present for parents visiting their children for the first time in months. From 1996 to 2010, Dr. Reedy would teach this meeting focusing on letting go, communication styles and assertive communication, and the Cycle of Wholeness (as a basic model for therapy). He provides this updated version to share the information and his current perspective on the skills presented.

Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience and discusses the challenges and the support needed when parenting children who struggle with mental health issues and addiction. He talks about how diagnoses help therapists understand the style of the person's defenses, but that the real task is to find the individual story that explains the symptoms.

Dr. Reedy discusses transitions and how they expose our ways of emotional maturity or lack of it; how we can be inclined to regress into old, comfortable ways of dealing with stress. He talks about going home from wilderness and moving on to another program. He explains how family work is best done when we focus on our work rather than how the child or others are doing.

Dr. Reedy takes questions on various topics from the live audience. He talks about how to respond when children regress or relapse into old behaviors. He talks about not trying to control how the child feels and how letting them feel helps them to move through and let go of emotions.

Dr. Reedy discusses the proliferation of 30-day, short term programs that are covered by insurance. He talks about the need for longer lengths of stays for best outcomes. He also talks about he unique aspects of wilderness therapy’s experiential approach and how it helps to bypass resistance. He explains that short term programs appeal to families due to their lower cost and shorter length of stay and how these aspects, while attractive, may not be the most effective and lowest cost for treatment in the end.

Dr. Reedy take questions from the audience on where to set boundaries with your children. He explains the similarities and differences between the relationship of parent and child versus our other relationships. He talks about attachment-based therapy and how a person develops (or doesn’t) into an authentic and real self.

Dr. Reedy explains Evoke’s approach to religion and emphasizes that therapists remain neutral when it comes to religion. He explains that good therapy will help clients find a spiritual practice that works for them. He explains how therapists are ethically bound to avoid giving advice when it comes to important life decisions including participation and identification with one’s religious ideology. He also talks about principle inherent in all the world’s major religions: surrender, humility, mindfulness, gratitude, and faith/radical acceptance.

Dr. Reedy talks about what to do when loved ones aren’t willing to look at their part in things. He answers questions on boundaries with children and how learning to love our horrible, rotten self is the key to freedom and leads to reduced suffering.

Dr. Reedy talks about the wound of abandonment. He talks about the different ways that we can abandon our children and how it’s not really accurate to talk about our children abandoning us. He talks about the benefit of studying parenting and child development from our perspective as children. He explains the need for us to take care of ourselves and come to terms with our “horrible, rotten selves” in order to be available to love more.

Dr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on attachment from a distance, supporting your child over your family of origin, when sharing feelings becomes manipulative, and the advantages and disadvantages of a stepparent’s perspective.