Insatiable with Ali Shapiro, MSOD, CHHC

In this fifth episode of season 14, I have a spirited and wide-ranging conversation with Rev. Kinsie M. Tate, founder of Restore Clergy, a nonprofit organization supporting clergy and caregivers. Together, we delve into the delicate complexities of stress leadership in midlife, perimenopause, and menopause. Strap in because we cover a lot ground that goes well beyond the common (just deep breathe?) stress management tactics you'll find out there.  Topics Covered:01:01: Introduction to Kinsey Tate & Why Stress Leadership in Midlife03:21: Understanding Stress and Finding Your Voice15:37: Stress and the Truce with Food framework19:45: Stress and Performance, i.e. It's not all about you31:12:  Stress and Change with Midlife's Unique Challenges32:33: Layering of Stories and Belief Structures50:03: Stress and Identity Shifts at Midlife56:33: Navigating Complexity and Chaos1:09:19: Stress and Grief1:20:51: Capital "T" TruthGuest: Rev. Kinsie M. Tate is an ordained clergy, a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, and certified Truce Coach. Kinsie heads the Restore Program to help clergy get to the root cause of chronic stress, so that they can enjoy a sustainable ministry.  Mentioned in this episode:My once-a-year group program Truce with Food is open for registration through January 31st. Early bird $500 off ends January 26th! Rev. Kinsie M. Tate's Restore Clergy program that supports clergy with holistic resources and programs that improve wellness in order to cultivate faithful and sustainable ministry. Transcript & Show Notes: alishapiro.com/stress-leadership-midlife-kinsie-tate/Send me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.

In this fourth episode of season 14, I'll help you filter through the perimenopause and menopause nutrition noise by busting 3 top myths. Why? Because most of the common advice out there is recycled diet culture heavily rooted in restriction and one-size-fits-all recommendations (at a time in our life when we require a more individualized approach).  Most women will gain weight at midlife, which makes us more susceptible to overblown weight loss and health promises. When I surveyed my list, weight gain was a top concern. Was mine as well as it felt like overnight, I had gained 30 pounds.  In this episode, I share a few lessons I've learned along the way from my own experience and my work with clients. Topics Covered:2:28: Myth #1 Weight Gain is a Given in Perimenopause and Menopause because of Hormone Imbalances 17:52: Myth #2 and Myth #2.5: Eating the right foods will cure my perimenopause and menopause symptoms OR my diet has nothing to do with these symptoms.32:46: Myth #3 The only way to lose weight in peri/menopause is to eat a lot less and exercise a lot more. Maybe intermittent fasting is the answer?Mentioned in this episode:Previous episode: Over 40? What Works Now: Perimenopause and Menopause Food and Exercise 101My client Laura Jacob's weight loss story featured in Prevention magazineSave $40 on your first Daily Harvest box by clicking hereMy once-a-year group program Truce with Food is open for registration through January 31st. Early bird $500 off ends January 26th! Transcript & Show Notes: alishapiro.com/menopause-weight-loss-mythsSend me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.

In this third episode of season 14, I have an eye-opening conversation around midlife sleep struggles with sleep coach Kelly Murray. Insomnia was my main perimenopause symptom (and I had no idea it was even a perimenopause symptom) and yet, about 60% of women report sleep challenges during perimenopause and menopause. Kelly and I will get into root-causes of poor sleep and how the hormonal changes of this time influence sleep. We’ll discuss the role of blood-sugar and gut health in sleep, how many sleep aids don’t address the root health issues insomnia is pointing to, what other minerals aside from magnesium are helpful, and the importance of stress management on sleep. If you've been struggling with sleep and are tired of trying out all of the recycled basic advice, this episode is for you.Topics Covered:Introduction: Why this episode? What makes sleep coach Kelly Murray different? 08:32: How my insomnia in perimenopause led me to Kelly10:16: What is considered a good night's sleep? Signs of bad sleep?15:43: Common sleep struggles20:12: Understanding the cortisol-melatonin connection with sleep25:00: What's happening with these 3am wake-ups?38:00: Most frequently asked questions on Google 41:10: HRT can help, but it's part of a larger puzzle47:33: Kelly's holistic approach to insomnia55:47: The role of magnesium and potassium 59:00: Is melatonin the answer? CBD gummies? 01:03:07: Small snacks before bedtime? 01:05:42: Three actionable takeways Guest:  Kelly Murray is an award-winning certified Pediatric and Adult Sleep Coach. She has been a featured expert and contributor to places like Real Simple, goop, Forbes, New York magazine, she’s also taught at Google. Mentioned in this episode:Kelly Murray's free training "Uncovering Hidden Sleep Sabotagers"Transcript & Show Notes: alishapiro.com/sleep-midlife-challenges-kelly-murraySend me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.

In this second episode of season 14, I have a thought-provoking conversation around midlife experiences, alcohol, and personal growth with bestselling author Laura McKowen. We explore the challenges of perimenopause, menopause, and the impact of alcohol consumption on women's health.  We cover it all, from the intersection of food and alcohol struggles with hormonal changes to the spiritual reckoning and opportunities that come with midlife. Whether you're struggling with food and alcohol during this stage in your life, are sober curious,  or just asking yourself some of the big midlife questions, this episode is for you. Topics Covered:Introduction:  Why this episode? Why Laura McKowen? And quick disclaimer3:55: Laura's perimenopause experience so far...9:47:  Work-life balance, shifting mindset, and newfound contentment14:53: Navigating body changes and exercise struggles18:21: Exploring the impact of food on glucose levels24:03: Unacknowledged grief: from addiction to menopause35:14: Empty nest and drinking?39:38:  Anger and "going mad" in menopause45:56: "Moderate" drinking in menopause?52:22: What is your relationship to alcohol?54:18: Cheryl Strayed exploring her own alcohol use56:00: How to experiment with not drinking01:05:05: Navigating life's changes with grace, compassion, and acceptance1:13:19: Predictions for the future of alcohol and menopauseGuest: Laura McKowen is the author of the bestselling memoir, We Are The Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life and Push Off From Here: Nine Essential Truths to Get You Through Life (and Everything Else). She has written for The New York Times and has been featured in The Wall Street Journal, The Guardian, The Atlantic, the TODAY show, and more. In 2020, she founded The Luckiest Club, a global sobriety support community. Laura lives with her daughter and partner on the North Shore of Boston.Mentioned in this episode:Laura McKowen's The Luckiest Club, a dogma-free, compassionate place to recover from alcohol addiction and thrive in life.  Laura McKowen's excellent substack Love Story.Sunnyside app and community to explore a more mindful approach to drinking.Cheryl Strayed's Dear Sugar Letter #28: A Problem Without a ProblemWhat Alcohol Does to Your Body, Brain & Health (Andrew Huberman Podcast)My once-a-year group program Truce with Food is open for registration through January 31st. Early bird $500 off ends January 26th! Transcript & Show Notes: alishapiro.com/alcohol-midlife-challenges-laura-mckowenSend me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.

Hello Insatiable Listeners! Strap in for this new season (the 14th!) where we'll cover all things perimenopause, menopause, and midlife. This introductory episode begins with my own personal story—including dramatic weight gain—and some shocking realizations that planted the initial seeds for this season we are about to embark upon. Let me tell you, midlife brings some serious changes and challenges on all fronts. In order to address these, in this episode, I provide an overview of the wide-ranging topics we’ll cover this season—that go beyond hot flashes—and give you a rundown of the incredible roster of guests that’ll help guide us through this often demanding and rewarding terrain. My aim this season is to create the resource I wish I had when I was going through this stage of life. Expect actionable takeaways and the deeper, more nuanced conversations you’ve come to expect from Insatiable.Thank you for listening.*New episodes will be released every Wednesday. ----------------------------------This Season's Upcoming Guests (Introduced in this Episode)Kelly Murray: An award-winning certified Pediatric and Adult Sleep Coach. Kelly has been a featured expert and contributor to places like Real Simple, goop, Forbes, New York magazine, she’s also taught at Google...the list goes on.Rev. Kinsie M. Tate: An ordained clergy, a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, and certified Truce Coach. Kinsie heads the Restore Program to help clergy get to the root cause of chronic stress, so that they can enjoy a sustainable ministry.  Laura McKowen: Author of the bestselling memoir, We Are The Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life and Push Off From Here: Nine Essential Truths to Get You Through Life (and Everything Else). In 2020, she founded The Luckiest Club, a global sobriety support community. Dr. Stacy Sims: An international exercise physiologist and nutrition scientist who has published over 70 peer-reviewed papers and several books, including the excellent Next Level: Your Guide to Kicking Ass, Feeling Great, and Crushing Goals Through Menopause and Beyond.Esther Blum: An integrative dietician, menopause expert and bestselling author of See ya later, Ovulator. Esther has been featured on the Today Show, ABC-TV, and Good Day NY and is frequently quoted in goop, Well + Good, Forbes, Fitness, and Time Magazine.Transcript & Show Notes for this episode: alishapiro.com/my-menopause-storySend me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.

Elise and I pick up our conversation from part one of her instant New York Times bestseller On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good.  In this episode, we take our conversation further and deeper, unpacking the sins of Envy and Sloth and their effect on women.  It’s rare I can talk to someone who understands the various perspectives on body image (including the ones where it has nothing to do with one’s body size) so it was a real treat to go to the depths. This includes why body positivity often misses the mark in supporting women’s relationship with their body.  In our interview today, we discuss:The changing nature of what defines enough food “restriction” (Kate Moss’ 90’s heroine chic wasn’t the end!)The unconscious yearnings in feeling light and “high” from restricting food to feeling heavy and “low” from bingingWhy it’s important to pay attention to your envy and judgment of other women, including their bodiesHow scarcity and the sin of Sloth drive women to rush, overwork, and overdoThe two sins no one has asked about in all her interviews and what’s the one thing she wishes would happen with her book that hasn’t. About EliseElise Loehnen is a writer, editor, and podcast host who lives in Los Angeles with her husband, Rob, and their two sons, Max and Sam. She is the host of Pulling the Thread, a podcast focused on pulling apart the stories we tell about who we are—and then putting those threads back together. She’s also the author of the instant New York Times bestseller On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good (Dial Press/PRH). The book weaves together history, memoir, and cultural criticism to explore the ways patriarchy lands in the bodies of women and embeds itself in our consciousness—and what we then police in ourselves and in each other. Regardless of our religious provenance, the self-denial implicit in each of the Seven Deadly Sins—Sloth, Envy, Pride, Gluttony, Greed, Lust, Anger—reads like a checklist of what it means to be a “good” woman. With awareness, we can begin to recognize these patterns of self-restriction, break the story, and move ourselves and each other toward freedom and balance.Elise is a frequent contributor to Oprah, and has written for The New York Times, Elle Decor, Stylist, and more. Mentioned in this EpisodeTruce Coaching Certification (TCC) Free TCC Sneak PeakWhy Am I Eating This Now Live?A Cookie Isn’t Just a Cookie: StoSend me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.

Annually, Elise Loehnen’s parents would weigh themselves in a vigilant effort to stay within five to ten pounds of their marriage weight. When Elise went away to boarding school, this culture further normalized eating vigilance and restriction as necessary. Then in her early career at Lucky Magazine, where she was often photographed, restricting her food in attempts to be a sample size at 5 ‘10 seemed like the obvious choice to stay on the path of acceptance and “goodness”. Then came a stint as goop’s content manager where she was immersed in the wellness industry’s gospel of “clean eating”, today’s socially acceptable term for restriction. And now, in her instant New York Times’ best seller book, On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good (Dial Press/PRH), Elise brilliantly connects how the sin of gluttony - not science - forms a tapestry of misguided restriction norms that have serious consequences for our food, bodies, and health.  In our interview today, we dive deep into Elise’s Gluttony chapter to discuss:The meta-physical invitation in Elise’s breathlessnessThe placebo and nocebo influence of the BMI, exercise that counts, and thinking about your weightThe difference between hunger instincts and intuition to more clearly hear your appetiteHow the cultural “good” body story creates blindspots and accompanying health risks no matter what your body size (and how to think differently to see these blindspots)What’s up with wanting to look disciplined yet effortless with your food and physique (asking for myself after not effortlessly losing my pregnancy weight)?About Elise Elise Loehnen is a writer, editor, and podcast host who lives in Los Angeles with her husband, Rob, and their two sons, Max and Sam. She is the host of Pulling the Thread, a podcast focused on pulling apart the stories we tell about who we are—and then putting those threads back together. She’s also the author of the instant New York Times bestseller On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good (Dial Press/PRH). The book weaves together history, memoir, and cultural criticism to explore the ways patriarchy lands in the bodies of women and embeds itself in our consciousness—and what we then police in ourselves and in each other. Regardless of our religious provenance, the self-denial implicit in each of the Seven Deadly Sins—Sloth, Envy, Pride, Gluttony, Greed, Lust, Anger—reads like a checklist of what it means to be a “good” woman. With awareness, we can begin to recognize these patterns of self-restriction, break the story, and move ourselves and each other toward freedom and balance.Elise is a frequent contributor to Oprah, and has written for The New York Times, Elle Decor, StylisSend me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.

Dive into the hormonal shifts that start around 35 and how they impact nutrition and exercise needs as you approach 40. Explore essential dietary changes and the surprising role of carbs at night. Discover tips for managing common symptoms like insomnia and weight gain through practical strategies and personal anecdotes. Strength training takes center stage, emphasizing its importance for resilience and overall wellness during this transformative phase. Join a community-focused discussion to redefine health narratives for women.

While Laura McKowen is known for her work around alcohol sobriety, her first coping strategy was food.Like Laura, I have many clients who come to me where their first “thing” was food. And after getting sober or soberish, their eating issues return or becomes a “thing”.In this special Insatiable episode, we apply the wisdom Laura writes about in her new book to food, body image, and the overlap with alcohol. We discuss:How Laura’s original coping mechanism was bingeing and the overlapping and distinct root causes between her food and alcohol strugglesWhy stopping bad habits like alcohol and battling food is different than starting new habits and how you change has to shift to what Laura discusses as “being willing to be led”Grief from the loss of using alcohol, food, and the fantasies they offer How wanting to be saved, desired, and chosen fueled Laura’s alcohol and body image issues and the deep work she did to heal and now be in a healthy relationshipHow Laura views sobriety as an invitation into a “Bigger Yes” (we also discuss the pushback at this suggestion and how it’s even more politically incorrect to say your body battle is an invitation into a “Bigger Yes”)The connection between eating disorders, alcohol use disorder, and sensitive, empathetic, and perceptive people (and their nervous systems), and where they need to push off too.Buy a copy of Laura’s new book, Push Off From Here: Nine Essential Truths to Get You Through Sobriety (And Everything Else) at https://www.lauramckowen.com/books or wherever you buy your favorite books.Send me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.

Dr. Michelle Segar, one of the more progressive health behavioral change experts, says sustainable behavior change with eating and exercise is not a product of rule-following.In other words, trying so hard to perfectly stick to a plan is not an effective goal or strategy. Rather, we need to learn flexibility. Because life is much more unpredictable these days. Anyone like me who sends their child to daycare knows this deep in their bones!We also need to learn how to experiment to see what actually works in this stage of our lives. Not what worked 20 years ago when our stress was minimal. Or now, in the menopausal transition. How does one learn this flexibility and trust in imperfect action, which often just feels like guilt and shame for “being bad”?I brought on my clients Whitnee and Erin to share their  Truce with Food journey of how they learned to listen to their bodies to figure out what really works for them now and effectively experiment to reach their health and wellness goals. In today’s episode we discuss,The importance of finding fun and magic in our goal pursuits, not just the accomplishment outcomeThe Catholic and Christian influences that formed both their stories and struggles to be “good”How Whitnee finally made a “Truce” with her dairy intolerance after years of the restrict-over do it cycle.How Whitnee and Erin both learned to be flexible with their exercise goals given Erin’s back pain and Whitnee’s knee pain, COVID, and then plantar fasciitis The challenge and freedom of growth mindset (ie.“trusting the process”) and how they set and work towards their goals now Mentioned in this episodeSMART Goals: How They Sabotage Eating and Exercise Goals workshop (free, 1/11/23)Truce with Food 2023: Registration runs 1/9-1/20. Save $500 in this once a year program when you register by January 16.Erintusa.com@trainwithtusaSend me (Ali) a text message. Connect with Ali & Insatiable: Click here to text Insatiable (for privacy, we only see the last 4 digits of your phone number) and won’t be able to text back. Please don’t delete prepopulated numbers as that identifies your message is meant for us.