Love Intently Podcast with Sophie Kwok

Nina Ho was born in Saigon, Vietnam, and landed in Houston, TX when she was five years old. Looking back, she can remember from a very young age trying to reject her own Asian identity in order to “fit in,” and being clumped into the “model minority” Asian stereotype. - The recent Black Lives Matter movement has brought up a moment for many Asian Americans to pause and see how white supremacy has negatively impacted them in their lives. What is the model minority myth, and why is it problematic? Where did this stereotype come from and why is it so harmful for Asian Americans today, especially when it comes to mental health and access to resources? - In this episode of Love Intently, we create space to answer these questions and dissect how white supremacy and colorism impacts Asian Americans. We also discuss the anti-blackness issue in the Asian American community, and much more. Sophie and Nina both share their personal stories and struggles growing up as first-generation Asian Americans and we learn about Nina’s event series, “Missfits Fest”, which celebrates Asian American women in entrepreneurship and the arts. - For full show notes: https://www.loveintently.com/podcast - Connect with Nina Ho https://www.instagram.com/ninaqho/ https://twitter.com/NinaQHo https://www.instagram.com/missfitsfest ninaqho.com - Connect with Love Intently https://loveintently.com Instagram: @love.intently Instagram: @sophkwok

There are two buzzwords that have been thrown around in the realm of dating and relationships lately that are often misused: narcissism and codependency. How do you know if you are a narcissist or codependent? How do you know if you’re dating one? - Dr. Sarah Schewitz is a licensed clinical psychologist in Los Angeles, and founder of Couples Learn, a successful online therapy practice for individuals and couples wanting to work on love and relationships. She has been working with couples and individuals since 2008 and has advanced training in the areas of attraction, attachment, conflict management, communication, rebuilding trust after infidelity, and relationship satisfaction.  - In this episode of the Love Intently Podcast, we discuss: - -A dialogue framework for couples that allows each partner to understand and communicate their childhood wounds with each other that are being triggered, in order to create a more conscious relationship -What are the red flags to look out for in a partner that indicates you should walk away from the relationship -How to know if you’re in a codependent relationship or dating a narcissist -How codependents and narcissists are two sides of the same coin, and what core childhood wound they have in common -How can couples maintain their identities in a relationship, rather than losing themselves? -What is Dr. Sarah’s online couples therapy Couples Learn all about and why did she start it? -Resources and tools other than therapy that couples can use to become more conscious in their relationship - With endless tools and resources online these days, there’s really no excuse to not take the responsibility to own your own healing journey. Often times it’s not actually a problem for us to find love—the real problem is our inability to receive love, because we do not love ourselves. The more conscious we become of why that is, the sooner we can begin to heal it, and the sooner we can find and receive the healthy, secure love we deserve and desire! - For full show notes: https://www.loveintently.com/podcast - **Resources** Book: Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D. Love Intently Podcast Episode 21 with Harville and Helen: https://loveintently.com/blog/harville-and-helen/2019/1/30 - **Connect with Dr. Sarah Schewitz** https://coupleslearn.com/ Instagram: @coupleslearn - Connect with Love Intently https://loveintently.com Instagram: @love.intently Instagram: @sophkwok

“If I’m gonna share my story I do have to share the fact that it has been rough.” -Blanca Lesmes, Co-Founder & CEO of BB ImagingDon’t ya just hate it when you go on Instagram and become anxious and depressed over how perfect everyones lives and businesses seem to be going?! We don’t often get to see the things that happen behind closed doors- the financial stress, the loneliness, the tears.Blanca and Ben are not shy about sharing the darker moments of their entrepreneurial journey which include the devastating impacts of the 2009 recession that almost put their house into foreclosure, and eventually led to their divorce after being together since high school (but continuing to run the business together!).Blanca, who always considered herself as someone who can do anything she set her mind to, was suddenly experiencing failure after failure. But, in an inspiring act of courage, she doubled down and invested in herself and used this time to become more self-aware. Similarly, Ben realized through this process how much growing he had to do and continued learning from counseling and spiritual guidance.Today, they are re-married, going on multiple date nights a week, and their business BB Imaging is back on track! In this episode, hear all the highs and REALLY low lows of Ben and Blanca’s journey to how they got to where they are today, and all the lessons they’ve learned along the way about self-awareness, embracing the imperfections of ourselves and others, and growing up. It ain’t perfect but it’s REAL!“There’s 5 levels of a relationship. The 4th level is conflict. Most people don’t get past that level of conflict..but what they don’t tell you, is if you do, on the other side is intimacy.” -Ben Buentipo“I think time with the people you love the most matters more than anything else. More than business success, or financial success. Maximizing time with the people you love is what you should be focused on." -Blanca LesmesBlanca Lesmes is the Co-Founder and CEO of BB Imaging, and Ben Buentipo is the Co-Founder and COO. BB Imaging offers comprehensive ultrasound solutions and consulting. Their mission is to make great healthcare more accessible to women, no matter the size of their wallet or location.For full show notes: https://loveintently.com/blog/dealing-with-the-highs-and-lows-of-entrepreneurshipConnect with Blanca & Ben For ultrasound services & consulting: http://www.bbimaging.net/ BB Imaging Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/BBImagingandConsulting/ BB Imaging Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bbimaging/Connect with Love Intently https://loveintently.com Instagram: @love.intently Instagram: @sophkwok

The recent global pandemic has surfaced some of our deepest fears. Between the layoffs, social distancing, and no true end in sight, it’s hard to keep level headed. This is a solo episode with our founder Sophie Kwok going through her tips thriving while being home 24/7. She shares her experience of staying sane and connected to her partner through these weird times.Disclaimer: This is geared towards couples without children. Parents, we admire y’all.Connect with us at loveintently.com Find us on Instagram: @love.intently @loveintentlypodcast @sophkwok

“That trauma made it possible for me to take a step out of the business that I had created for myself in my life and grow in ways that I wouldn’t have been able to. I always try to have a growth mindset and appreciate all circumstances in this life.” -Annabelle EvangelineAnnabelle Evangeline is back for another episode! All the way back in episode 19, Sophie and Annabelle shared their journey of moving from an avoidant or anxious attachment style to a secure attachment style. A lot has happened since the last episode in 2018 for these two, with many ups and downs, including trauma therapy and healing, death of loved ones, ending of old relationships and starting new relationships. In this episode, they openly share the lessons they’ve learned along the way and focus more on what having a secure and healthy attachment style actually looks like in practice, with plenty of real-life examples.A few highlights from the conversation: -What it was like for both of them actually entering a new relationship after moving from avoidant or anxious to secure attachment styles -How they’ve become more aware of their triggers in the moment and how they deal with it in a healthy way -The most helpful responses from their partners when they are in a triggered state -What it was like for Sophie to enter a new relationship while also beginning trauma therapy“If they empower you to love yourself better, that’s a green flag rather than a red flag.” -SophieAnnabelle is a Los Angeles based writer and entrepreneur who believes that the key to unlocking life’s purpose is by living vulnerably, practicing creativity, and embracing community. She is the author of Into the Darkness: A Workbook for Trauma Survivors which was created from her own experience with mental health and sexual trauma. She writes a blog that she is turning into a book called "Letters To My Little Sisters" through which she shares her experiences in hopes to help other women learn from her journey.For full show notes: https://www.loveintently.com/blog/what-does-a-secure-relationship-look-like-annabelle-evangelineConnect with Annabelle: http://www.annabelledura.com/ http://letterstomylittlesisters.com/ Instagram: @letterstomylittlesistersConnect with Sophie and Love Intently https://loveintently.com Follow @love.intently on Instagram Follow @sophkwok on Instagram

A Stanford study came out in August 2019 that said 1 in 3 people are finding relationships online and staying in relationships from the ones they found online. And, 80% of people on Bumble are on there to find meaningful relationships. Times have really changed! But how do we maintain human connection, learn to communicate effectively, and love intently in this algorithm-driven world?I realized how important relationships were when I became aware of how my lack of knowledge about what healthy relationships look like was impacting me in every area of my life- romantic relationships, family, friendships, and business. That’s why I’m so passionate about empowering others to have healthy relationships and to love and live intently!And I am SO excited to introduce our next guest, Chelsea Cain Maclin, Vice President of Marketing at Bumble. In this episode of the Love Intently Podcast, we talk about how Chelsea ended up working for Bumble, how she met and fell in love with her husband (and no- it wasn’t through Bumble, it didn’t exist yet!). She shares with us some tips for creating your profile based on analysis of their users, and tells us what she wishes she knew sooner in regards to relationships and marriage. She shares more about Bumble’s other services such as BumbleBFF and BumbleBizz and how women can use these services to advance their careers and make meaningful friendships. Bumble has lots of exciting initiatives and events aimed at empowering women and encouraging more diversity and inclusion in the workplace, so tune in to hear more!For full show notes and links:  https://www.loveintently.com/blog/how-to-use-bumble-for-relationships-and-businessFind and support Chelsea Cain Maclin: You can find Chelsea on the Bumble Bizz app, or on her personal Instagram: @chelseacainmaclin Chelsea on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chelsea-cain-maclin-61976521/ Or any of the Bumble Instagram accounts: @bumble, @bumbleBFF, or @bumbleBIZZConnect with Sophie and Love Intently https://loveintently.com Follow @love.intently on Instagram Follow @sophkwok on Instagram

In this episode, we tackle the tough life questions of "Who are you?" and "How do you identify yourself?" These questions are not easy for anyone to answer. For our guest Heather Gallagher, her journey of understanding and owning her identity has been especially difficult as a third culture kid.She gives us a look behind the curtains into her world, where she is a Chinese-American who grew up in a predominantly black community, and is a CODA, which means she is the Child of a Deaf Adult.Imagine not having a common language with your mother. Imagine constantly feeling like you are misunderstanding and being misunderstood. When you're among other Asians, you don't feel Asian enough, and when you're among white people, you want to own your place as the minority, which means rejecting a whole part of you.These identity and culture clashes shaped Heather's childhood. Now, she's grown into even more identities like photographer, business owner, doula, spouse, new mother, and most recently, author.Her book will be the fascinating story of how she learned to communicate with her mother without words, writing, or sign language.Heather says, "You can be face to face with somebody and talking but not fully communicating. Your words can fail sometimes. What I hope people can learn from my story is that there there IS a way. Maybe it’s not the most direct route, but if you really care, you can find a way to connect. Maybe it’s not with words. Maybe you can create your own language."This is a story of hope, finding your identity and how Heather learned to create her own language with her mother. And let us not forget, she also has a crazy story to tell about how she met her husband from responding to an advertisement in a magazine!For full show notes: https://loveintently.com/blog/finding-identity-as-a-third-culture-kidConnect with Heather Heather is a full-spectrum Doula and family, birth and death photographer at https://www.lifesaspectrum.co/ Instagram: @lifesaspectrumConnect with Love Intently https://loveintently.com Instagram: @love.intently Instagram: @sophkwok

KC McCormick Çiftçi is the creator of Borderless Stories, a community for couples in intercultural relationships who are feeling alone and overwhelmed in the process of immigration and getting married. The idea was created because KC went through this process herself along with her now husband who is from Turkey. At that time, she couldn't find very many helpful resources or other couples in the same situation. It was a very stressful and lonely time filled with worries and doubts. They didn't have anyone to turn to who could truly understand the situation because they've been through it.In episode 43 of the Love Intently Podcast, KC shares her story of how she met her husband when she went to Turkey to study English. We also talk about what kinds of challenges they've had in their relationship due to cultural differences and how they overcame them. And of course, their journey of immigrating her husband to the US and getting married (three times!), and more about Borderless Stories.You can head to https://www.borderlessstories.com/ where you can become a member of the community, where you'll have access to: -Monthly classes on various issues unique to the community -Monthly hot seat live coaching opportunities -An engaged, exclusive community, accessible by browser or app -Challenges and discounts available only to Borderless Community membersTICKETS TO THE LOVE + CULTURE HAVEN 2020:  https://retreat2020.borderlessstories.com/?sc=kfM577PG&ac=IeOEUrp5On Feb 13th, there will be a Live Love Intently Podcast recording with Elsa Moreck and Jessica Honeger. For more details go here: http://eventbrite.com/e/love-intently-live-podcast-recording-at-austin-proper-hotel-tickets-91243452623Be sure to check out the Borderless Stories podcast too to hear from KC and her husband, as well as other multicultural couples and experts. It's truly an amazing community that so many couples have been searching for!For full show notes and links: https://love.intently.com/blog/community-for-cross-cultural-couplesConnect with KC Website: https://www.borderlessstories.com/ Instagram: @kcmciftci and @borderlessstoriespodcastConnect with Sophie and Love Intently https://loveintently.com Follow @love.intently on Instagram Follow @sophkwok on Instagram

Katey Yurko lives in Austin, Texas with her boyfriend Dan. She's the creator of The Violet Fog, a website packed with tips on mental wellness, love, holistic well-being and DIY beauty. She has SUCH an important message to share with us today. It's about how loving and KNOWING yourself more intently can help those who live with depression.Katey went for years not understanding her depression well, and developed really unhealthy coping mechanisms. She isolated herself from others, for fear of being judged or misunderstood. She felt like a burden to friends and family, even though they were always supportive.That's why she's so passionate to share what has helped her the most in her struggle with depression. She especially wants to share her knowledge on ways to fight depression that don't include taking prescription medication.Listen in to episode number 44 of the Love Intently Podcast to hear how Katey realized she had depression, what it looked like in her darkest days, research-based tips for depression and mental wellness, and how she opens up to her boyfriend and family when she's having a depressive episode.You can follow her on Instagram @thevioletfog and on her website, http://violetfog.com/. She absolutely loves when people who follow her say hello and connect, so don't be shy!  Additionally, there are two exciting events Love Intently is involved with this month.On Feb 13th, there will be a Live Love Intently Podcast recording with Elsa Moreck and Jessica Honeger. For more details go here: http://eventbrite.com/e/love-intently-live-podcast-recording-at-austin-proper-hotel-tickets-91243452623Love + Culture Haven: a virtual retreat celebrating love across borders https://retreat2020.borderlessstories.com/?sc=kfM577PG&ac=IeOEUrp5For full show notes: https://loveintently.com/blog/how-to-fight-depression-naturally-violet-fog

We’re back! After a 4ish month break, we are back with two episodes this week. On this episode Sophie shares her journey over the last year and why she had to take a break. She was facing a massive creative and emotional burnout on top of health issues that sprung up on her. On this episode she will share her lessons through this break and whats to come from the Love Intently podcast.Additionally, there are two exciting events Love Intently is involved with this month.On Feb 13th, there will be a Live Love Intently Podcast recording with Elsa Moreck and Jessica Honeger. For more details go here: http://eventbrite.com/e/love-intently-live-podcast-recording-at-austin-proper-hotel-tickets-91243452623Love + Culture Haven: a virtual retreat celebrating love across borders https://retreat2020.borderlessstories.com/?sc=kfM577PG&ac=IeOEUrp5Instagram: @sophkwok @love.intentlyLink to Shownotes: https://loveintently.com/blog/wereback