How Not To Suck At Divorce
Morgan Stogsdill and Andrea Rappaport
How Not to Suck at Divorce is the divorce podcast for people who want clarity, strategy, and support—not drama, shame, or sugarcoating.
Hosted by powerhouse family law attorney Morgan Stogsdill, head of family law at the largest firm in the country, and comedian-turned-marketing-guru Andrea Rappaport, this show helps you avoid the most common (and costly) divorce mistakes while protecting your kids, your finances, and your sanity.
How Not to Suck at Divorce offers you divorce guidance that only the really wealthy can afford.
Each episode breaks down what actually matters during divorce—custody, co-parenting, negotiations, communication, and decision-making—using real-world examples, practical tools, and a refreshingly honest approach. You’ll learn what to tell your lawyer (and what to tell your friends), how to manage emotions without letting them derail your case, and how to move forward even when the process isn’t over.
Whether you’re thinking about divorce, in the middle of it, or trying to rebuild your life after, How Not to Suck at Divorce gives you the information you need, the validation you deserve, and the confidence to make better decisions—one step at a time.
Morgan Stogsdill has seen every curveball, knows the difference between drama and strategy, and helps clients avoid costly mistakes. Andrea Rappaport has made the exact painful mistakes we beg you not to repeat. Together, we’ve built a podcast that blends courtroom-level insight with compassionate, practical moves you can use the second the episode ends.
What We Cover
Should I stay or should I go? Decision-making frameworks, acronyms, and step-by-step exercises for clarity.
Co-parenting and high-conflict personalities. We unpack narcissist dynamics, manipulation tactics, and non-reactive communication. (We even created a framework called “WTF” to help you remember it when your brain is on fire.)
The BIFF method and conflict de-escalation. With Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute, we translate his tools into real-world texts and emails you can send without blowing up your case.
Tech safety and AI mistakes. Steven Bradley, former FBI agent and digital safety expert
Prenups, financial transparency, and power dynamics. Guests like Katie Post share what to include, what to avoid, and how to start the conversation before things go off the rails.
That’s our recipe: expert interviews + practical tools + humor that keeps you breathing. Episodes are short enough for a dog walk but deep enough to change your next decision.
Who You’ll Hear
Bill Eddy (High Conflict Institute): BIFF and EAR techniques, parallel parenting, and communication guardrails.
Steven Bradley (former FBI “Tech Cowboy”): Digital breadcrumbs, evidence handling, and how AI can backfire in divorce.
Dr. Nadine Macaluso (therapist, trauma specialist): Love-bombing, trauma bonds, and healing after divorce.
Joanna Strober (Midi Health): Resilience, perimenopause, career pivots, and financial autonomy.
Core Topics
Divorce Strategy & Family Law: prenups, mediation vs. litigation, custody agreements, relocation, settlement strategy.
High-Conflict & Safety: coercive control, gaslighting, BIFF, protective orders, tech hygiene. Co-Parenting & Parallel Parenting: calendars, school/holiday schedules, and communication protocols. Money & Power: financial disclosure, tracing assets, budgeting, and managing fees.Mindset & Mental Health: compartmentalizing, trigger management, boundary scripts, and choosing the right therapist or coach.
Our show is both resourceful and entertaining. You’ll laugh, take notes, and walk away feeling less alone. How Not to Suck at Divorce has become a trusted resource worldwide.
Whether you’re in the middle of a divorce, just considering it, or rebuilding afterward, this podcast helps you breathe easier, protect your sanity, and avoid the mistakes that cost people the most.
You’ll get through this. We promise. You’ve got this… and we’ve got you.
Hosted by powerhouse family law attorney Morgan Stogsdill, head of family law at the largest firm in the country, and comedian-turned-marketing-guru Andrea Rappaport, this show helps you avoid the most common (and costly) divorce mistakes while protecting your kids, your finances, and your sanity.
How Not to Suck at Divorce offers you divorce guidance that only the really wealthy can afford.
Each episode breaks down what actually matters during divorce—custody, co-parenting, negotiations, communication, and decision-making—using real-world examples, practical tools, and a refreshingly honest approach. You’ll learn what to tell your lawyer (and what to tell your friends), how to manage emotions without letting them derail your case, and how to move forward even when the process isn’t over.
Whether you’re thinking about divorce, in the middle of it, or trying to rebuild your life after, How Not to Suck at Divorce gives you the information you need, the validation you deserve, and the confidence to make better decisions—one step at a time.
Morgan Stogsdill has seen every curveball, knows the difference between drama and strategy, and helps clients avoid costly mistakes. Andrea Rappaport has made the exact painful mistakes we beg you not to repeat. Together, we’ve built a podcast that blends courtroom-level insight with compassionate, practical moves you can use the second the episode ends.
What We Cover
Should I stay or should I go? Decision-making frameworks, acronyms, and step-by-step exercises for clarity.
Co-parenting and high-conflict personalities. We unpack narcissist dynamics, manipulation tactics, and non-reactive communication. (We even created a framework called “WTF” to help you remember it when your brain is on fire.)
The BIFF method and conflict de-escalation. With Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute, we translate his tools into real-world texts and emails you can send without blowing up your case.
Tech safety and AI mistakes. Steven Bradley, former FBI agent and digital safety expert
Prenups, financial transparency, and power dynamics. Guests like Katie Post share what to include, what to avoid, and how to start the conversation before things go off the rails.
That’s our recipe: expert interviews + practical tools + humor that keeps you breathing. Episodes are short enough for a dog walk but deep enough to change your next decision.
Who You’ll Hear
Bill Eddy (High Conflict Institute): BIFF and EAR techniques, parallel parenting, and communication guardrails.
Steven Bradley (former FBI “Tech Cowboy”): Digital breadcrumbs, evidence handling, and how AI can backfire in divorce.
Dr. Nadine Macaluso (therapist, trauma specialist): Love-bombing, trauma bonds, and healing after divorce.
Joanna Strober (Midi Health): Resilience, perimenopause, career pivots, and financial autonomy.
Core Topics
Divorce Strategy & Family Law: prenups, mediation vs. litigation, custody agreements, relocation, settlement strategy.
High-Conflict & Safety: coercive control, gaslighting, BIFF, protective orders, tech hygiene. Co-Parenting & Parallel Parenting: calendars, school/holiday schedules, and communication protocols. Money & Power: financial disclosure, tracing assets, budgeting, and managing fees.Mindset & Mental Health: compartmentalizing, trigger management, boundary scripts, and choosing the right therapist or coach.
Our show is both resourceful and entertaining. You’ll laugh, take notes, and walk away feeling less alone. How Not to Suck at Divorce has become a trusted resource worldwide.
Whether you’re in the middle of a divorce, just considering it, or rebuilding afterward, this podcast helps you breathe easier, protect your sanity, and avoid the mistakes that cost people the most.
You’ll get through this. We promise. You’ve got this… and we’ve got you.
Episodes
Mentioned books
Dec 15, 2022 • 36min
46. Do NOT Finalize Your Divorce Before Listening to this Episode!
What do you need to lookout for towards the end of your divorce process?? Basically, that you aren't rushing the process. When we rush, we make mistakes. Here are a few PRO TIPS: 1) Print out your Martial Settlement Agreement and CIRCLE what doesn't make sense to you. CIRCLE to find a SOLUTION. Ask your attorney to go over all parts that you circled. 2) Understand all of the tax implications in your MSA. (Don't be caught by surprise) 3) If you're divorcing at the end of the year, evaluate whether it makes more sense (tax wise) to remained married until Jan 2nd of the following year. (could save you lots of money) And remember: The aggrevation is temporary. The terms of a MSA (Martial Settlement Agreement) are permanment. Please rate and review this show if it helped you! And follow us on Instagram! http://www.instagram.com/hownottosuckatdivorce And Facebook! http://www.facebook.com/hownottosuckatdivorcepodcast TikTok http://www.tiktok.com/hownottosuckatdivorcepod And our website! http://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com Oh, and YouTube! http://www.youtube.com/hownotosuckatdivorce
Dec 8, 2022 • 45min
45. A SOLUTION for Settling Expenses with Your Co-parent Post Divorce: The Onward App
Stop texting your EX!! (about money) The Onward app was created with co-parents and children in mind. Every parenting situation is different. For families with divorced or separated parents, there are financial burdens and situations that need to be resolved. That's where the Onward App steps in! The Onward App was created to make tracking, sharing and settling expenses as easy as possible. That way, you and your co-parent don't have to spend as much time stressing about finances and who bought what for your child when, but rather using that time to focus on your children. Both easy to use and free, you can download the Onward App on both Apple and Android phones on the Apple App Store and Google Play Store. Start using the app to track, share and settle expenses. Divorce sucks, we know that. How Not to Suck at Divorce is here to offer you SOLUTIONS and guidance so that you won't suck at getting divorced, or suck at life post divorce. Download Onward here: CLICK HERE! Resolve you expenses with ease. Stop texting your Ex. Move ONWARD and upward.
Dec 1, 2022 • 22min
44. "Oprah's" Favorite Things!! Morgan and Andrea's Holiday Gift Guide
What should you get your friends for Christmas or Hanukkah this year? What should you buy your divorced friends for Christmas or Hanukkah this year? Here's our "Oprah's" Favorite Things episode (Thanks to our FABULOUS guest, Bill Doherty, who once mentioned that we interviewed him better than Oprah did...we will forever think that we are in the same lane as the queen of daytime TV) This season, you FOR SURE want to get your hands on: 1. Chocolate Shakeology Protein Shake https://www.teambeachbody.com/shop/us/d/chocolate-plant-based-vegan-shakeology-SHKCHVegan?referringRepId=971096 2. Fresh Overnight Mask https://www.sephora.com/product/fresh-floral-recovery-redness-reducing-overnight-mask-P479841?country_switch=us&lang=en&skuId=2535417&om_mmc=ppc-GG_18525596383_139024248461_pla-1211245547446_2535417_626611912078_9021768_c&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIoq-LjKzX-wIV03NvBB1OagOrEAQYAyABEgIrv_D_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds 3. Rose Forever Roses www.roseforever.com 4. MomSquad Clothing "Diva" Leggings https://momsquadclothing.com/collections/bottoms/products/diva 5. Pura Home Fragrance https://www.trypura.com 6. Williams Sonoma Truffle Popcorn Salt https://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/regalis-black-truffle-popcorn-salt/ 7. Andrea's Giant Water Bottle https://a.co/d/34A4Pgc 8. Body Restore Shower Tabs https://a.co/d/fDF69VL 9. The Original Chicago Sauce https://hereheremarket.com/products/the-original-chicago-sauce?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI6pvUu63X-wIVt2xvBB2J_AmEEAAYASAAEgIqQvD_BwE 10. One Piece Onesie https://www.onepiece.com/us For forth and SHOP, folks! Wishing you a very merry/happy holiday shopping season!!
Nov 24, 2022 • 56min
43. How to Survive the Holidays Without Your Kids with Lisa McGregor
How do you cope with the pain of not having your kids over a holiday? Coparenting is hard. Managing the weekends, weeks, and holiday weekends without your kids is harder. Our guest, Lisa McGregor, of The Unplanned Chapter, helps divorced mom through the next phase of their life. We list out ACTION STEPS that all moms can take is they are without they're kids over a holiday. We know that's it's not easy, but it's doable and we are here to help. Please join Lisa's group for support, information, and entertainment. Lisa, along with Andrea from our show, will be providing entertainmnet ALL DAY LONG!! http://www.facebook.com/theunplannedchapter And if you want to try Andrea's FAVORITE protein shake, come check it out here: It's a GAME CHANGER!! https://www.teambeachbody.com/shop/us/d/chocolate-plant-based-vegan-shakeology-SHKCHVegan?referringRepId=2867305 Hang in there, friends. You've got this and We've Got YOU!
Nov 17, 2022 • 59min
42. Divorcing a Cult: An Inside Look at the FLDS with Dr Malissa Tigges
This episode digs into the trauma, mental, emotional and sexual abuse that went on in the FLDS cult, led by Warren Jeffs, and how it relates to the trauma that goes on in many marriages and divorces. This episode has been produced to support KidSide Miami. A charity which enables families in the family court system to recieve FREE therapy in the Miami Day county. PLEASE visit our special link TODAY (11/17) to donate to KidSide. Every donation goes DIRECTLY to helping a family work towards happier and healthier relationships with their children in the family court system. Donate HERE! How hard is it to leave a cult? What happened in the FLDS? What kind of abuse went on in the FLDS? Can you get a divorce in a cult?
Nov 10, 2022 • 50min
41. I Bought My Husband's Mistress Lingerie. With Author, Stacey Freeman
You read that correctly. I Bought My Husband's Mistress Lingerie. It's a brand new, emotional tell-all memoir, written by Stacey Freeman. This is a TRUE STORY, and yes, it's juicy. But it's also packed with hope and persceptive. PRE ORDER THIS BOOK HERE: Amazon This episode will leave you with your mouth and your heart open. Stacey's candor and transparency are inspiring. She waded her way through the nauesous feelings that come with a marriage that ends in infidelity. Have you wondered: How to get along with my ex husband's new girlfriend? How to help my kids get along their stepmother? How to heal from an affair? If so, this episode and book is EXACTLY what you've been looking for! And on OBSESSED: Skinny Pop Popcorn. Yes, Morgan is obsessed. And Andrea is currently eating out of bag of one right now...likely.
Nov 3, 2022 • 1h 1min
40. What if I Die During my Divorce? With Lauren Wolven
What happens if you die during your divorce process?? What happens to your children? What happens to your money? We are talking with Lauren Wolven, she’s a partner in Trusts and Estates with Levenfeld Pearlstein in Chicago, IL. Here’s the good news: There are several steps you can take to ensure that you’ve covered all of your bases, just in case you die during or soon after your divorce. We cover a lot of ground on this episode, including: 1. How do I change my power of medical attorney during a divorce? 2. How do I change my Life Insurance policy when going through a divorce? 3. How do I change my Will when I'm going through a divorce? **How Not to Suck at Divorce Pro Tip**: Don’t buy your Will template from Etsy. (this started as a joke, until we realized that it's actually possible) And remember, all roads lead back to hiring the RIGHT team to support you during your divorce process. The RIGHT divorce attorney, the RIGHT estate attorney, and the RIGHT podcast to help you along the way! Make sure you listen all the way to the end of the episode to hear some crazy stories about what some people leave as their final wishes! To get in touch with Lauren Wolven, please visit her at: LP Chicago Oh, and our OBESSION this week?? Andrea tells us all about her obsession with Mark and Graham! Their monogramed handbags are to die fo... nope, not gonna use that expression today! We love hearing from you! Email us at hello@hownottosuckatdivorce.com or dm us at: @hownottosuckatdivorce @theandrearappaport @divorceattorneychicago WE'RE ON YOUTUBE NOW! Check us out: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCMSvrn9lrdJt8mY1i_1tFwg You can also reach out to us through our website: www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com Please rate and review so our little show can reach more people xo
Oct 27, 2022 • 60min
39. Parental Alienation and Divorce with Dr. Malissa Tigges
Parental Alienation is not a fun topic but it's an important one for everyone who is considering or going through a divorce to understand so they can avoid it. Because it harms children and none of us want that. It also harms both parents and their relationships with their kids, not just the parent being alienated. Dr. Malissa Tigges is back. If you missed episode 37, Dr. Tigges is a licensed clinical and forensics psychologist with over 10 years of experience working as a psychotherapist and an evaluator. Parental Alienation is a buzzword thrown around in family court but today Dr. Tigges, Andrea and Morgan are going to break it all down. They will answer: 1. What is parental alienation? 2. How can we avoid parental alienation? 3. What are the two different types of alienation and how are they different? 4. What are the three levels of alienation? 5. What are the 17 strategies of alienation? 6. How parental alienation harms the kids (if you're the one alienating the other parent, trust us...you don't want to miss this part) 7. How can I help my child heal from parental alienation? 8. How parental alienation harms both parents 9. Can kids be taken away from a parent who is committing parental alienation? Morgan also shares advice she gives her own clients who are on both sides of parental alienation. *************** Special Segments Obsessed: Now onto something a little more comfortable. This week Morgan is obsessed with OnePiece at onepiece.com. It's a one-piece sweatsuit for women, men and kids. It's so cozy and makes the best gift. It's like a luxury adult onesie. We're not affiliated with OnePiece, Morgan is just obsessed and has been wearing them for years. Let's Be Positive: Andrea shares some things you can do with your children to reconnect and strengthen your relationship. **************** Here is where you can connect with Dr. Tigges: @drmalissatigges on instagram, tiktok and facebook Dr. Tigges is licensed in Florida but if you're not in Florida, your state may allow you to do telehealth with Dr. Tigges so if you need guidance, reach out! We love hearing from you! Email us at hello@hownottosuckatdivorce.com or dm us at: @hownottosuckatdivorce @theandrearappaport @divorceattorneychicago WE'RE ON YOUTUBE NOW! Check us out: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCMSvrn9lrdJt8mY1i_1tFwg You can also reach out to us through our website: www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com Please rate and review so our little show can reach more people xo The Podcast does not contain legal advice. The information provided on the Podcast and the resources available for download through the Podcast and/or in show notes is not intended as, and shall not be understood or construed as, legal advice.
Oct 20, 2022 • 1h 2min
38. Healing From Infidelity with Dr. Randy Heller
Today we have fan favorite Dr. Randy Heller to discuss how to heal from infidelity. Betrayal often has a huge impact on the divorce process because it adds fuel to an already raging fire. We want to help you move through the anger so you can make good decisions during your divorce. This is a heavy issue but we promise, by the end of the episode, you will feel better. If you're new here, Dr. Randy Heller is a licensed marriage and family therapist, licensed mental health counselor, certified Supreme Court family mediator, credentialed collaborative divorce family specialist and facilitator, parenting coordinator, certified hypnotherapist, and the founder and Clinical Director of The Family Network. Like, wow. Dr. Randy talks about the different types of infidelity. It's not just cheating. Infidelity can also be lying, stealing, and hiding money. Infidelity can be any type of betrayal. We talk about: Triggers after the betrayal How to trust your attorney after having your trust broken by your spouse How to deal with the pain of infidelity How to heal Because levity is important, we didn't skip our obsessed segment today. This week Morgan is obsessed with Meyers hand soap. Her fave scents are Rosemary, Rain, and Daisy (it doesn't smell like flowers). Post-pandemic Morgan is especially appreciative of how well it lathers and cleans. We're not affiliated with Meyers but if they want to slide into our dms, we won't be sad. You can find Dr. Randy Heller here: thefamilynetwk@aol.com 646-717-6718 mycollaborativeteam.com No matter what you're going through, we're here for you. We love hearing from you so don't be shy. Slide into our dms: @hownottosuckatdivorce @theandrearappaport @divorceattorneychicago If you're liking our little show, it would mean the world to us if you rated and reviewed us right in your Apple podcast app or wherever you listen XO
Oct 13, 2022 • 58min
37. Putting Your Children First in the Parenting Agreement with Malissa Tigges
This is no episode for babies (no offense, babies). We're getting into some real, REAL stuff in this episode. This is one of the biggest concerns our listeners have so we wanted to dedicate an entire episode to how to put your kiddos first in your parenting agreement. Today, we have therapist Dr. Malissa Tigges with us to talk about how to create a parenting agreement that prioritizes the welfare of your kids. Dr. Tigges is a licensed clinical and forensics psychologist with over 10 years of experience working as a psychotherapist and an evaluator. She helps people make the best decisions possible when developing their parenting agreements. Dr. Tigges, Morgan and Andrea answer: What do divorcing couples need to understand when putting together their parenting agreement? How to design the parenting agreement so it's appropriate at each age of the children. The biggest mistake divorcing couples make when creating their parenting agreement. What is the main difference of a parenting plan that involves a younger child vs. a teenager? Can you modify a parenting agreement? Who should you consult with to ensure your parenting agreement is the best for your child? Should you open the parenting agreement email after having a few drinks? What is co-parenting therapy and is it necessary? What do you do when your rights are being violated during the divorce process when you're drafting the parenting agreement? What's the best schedule for co-parenting? 50/50? Week on, week off? Every other weekend? The answer may upset you, but it's important to understand. Is there wiggle room in a parenting agreement if there's a special trip or long weekend planned? Dr. Tigges also shares her absolute "must-dos". Here is where you can connect with Dr. Tigges: @drmalissatigges on instagram, tiktok and facebook Dr. Tigges is licensed in Florida but if you're not in Florida, your state may allow you to do telehealth with Dr. Tigges so if you need guidance, reach out! OBSESSED: This week Andrea is obsessed with a non-medicated inhaler that has been scientifically proven to calm anxiety. It's called CalmiGo. It measures how much air you exhale and will vibrate when you exhale properly to help you regulate your breathing. It helps Andrea feel more grounded and has made her realize how shallow she typically breathes during the day. It's genius. CalmiGo sent the inhaler to Andrea after she posted the instagram reel of the time she was in the hospital for a panic attack. But please know, we do not recommend products just because we got one free. We will only recommend products we truly love and use. And this is one of those, for sure. If you go to Andrea's IG and click the link in her bio, you'll get a $30 off coupon. Don't miss the very end of the episode because we talk about how it has just been discovered that honey bee venom can kill breast cancer cells. Amazing! There's also a new study on a possible cure for lupus and other autoimmune diseases AND, new developments on slowing the progression of Alzheimer's. We love ending the show with some positivity :) To our one listener in Honduras, we see you and adore you. Thank you for being here with us. xo We'd love to know what you think of the show! Please email us at hello@hownottosuckatdivorce.com or dm us at: @theandrearappaport @divorceattorneychicago You can also reach out to us through our website: www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com We read every message and reply personally because our community means the world to us and we want you to know we're here for you. You got this and we got you.
