Scratch That: Parenting & ReParenting Off Script

We don't have a lot of words right now. No hot takes. No three step plans. We feel heavy, confused, and scared. And while we might have the impulse to shut down, we want to be intentional to bear witness to the untidy snarl of this moment. It didn't feel right to carry along with our regularly programming when so many of us are grieving & afraid right now. So here's a tiny conversation to hold space for a greater pause — for feeling our feelings, for taking deep breaths, for listening to more stories & reflecting on the stories we hold, for making plans to support the ones around us, for whatever we need to feel the ground beneath us.And in the meantime, here are some poems & essays that are speaking to us right now.What do you turn toward? by Lisa OliveraMAGA Hat In the Chemo Room, by Andrea GibsonFor My Sister, by Kate BaerI don't want another black president: a love letter, by Kaplan Villacorte TrudoHow Dark the Beginning, by Maggie Smith

Dive into a tender conversation about internalized ableism as two individuals share their personal struggles with diagnosis and identity. They explore the rollercoaster of emotions that arise with new diagnoses, highlighting the pressures of societal expectations for parents. The discussion reveals the intertwining nature of postpartum challenges, mental health, and disability. With candid reflections, they advocate for understanding and a beautiful journey of adjusting to new realities, emphasizing the need for community support and acceptance.

This conversation dives deep into the challenges parents face when sharing stories about their children, balancing privacy with the desire to connect. It explores how family narratives can clash and the profound impact of storytelling on relationships. The speakers reflect on evolving parent-child dynamics, the significance of respecting each child's unique narrative, and the emotional complexities introduced by social media. Throughout, they question how to maintain a sense of self while nurturing empathy and individuality in their parenting journeys.

Today, we share with you a tender conversation with the one-and-only deep-feeler, wholehearted Emma Parker.Emma is a photographer who longs for deep connections, feels inspired by the ways we are all different and also the same, and, for the last two years, has experienced infertility and miscarriage. Emma generously agreed to share some of her story, experience, and insight with Caitlin and Rebekah – two people who do not share this experience – with the hope that it could help give all of us in the Scratch That community new scripts for processing our own unique experiences and showing up for the ones we love. We are so grateful she was willing to have this vulnerable conversation with us – and y'all, she showed up with such honesty and heart💛Tune in to hear about:🌟 Fumbling through uncomfortable conversations.🚫 The scripts we want to avoid when someone is going through infertility or miscarriage.🌗 Growing our capacities for feeling more than one thing at a time.🌱 Showing up for our hurting people by learning to sit with our own pain & discomfort.❤️ Practicing new scripts for how to engage our kids when they are struggling.📦 Miscarriage care-packages!🌊 Better scripts for when our loved ones are experiencing unresolved/ongoing suffering.Where to find everyone:Follow Emma on Instagram @emmybeephotog + visit her websiteFollow Rebekah on Instagram @sitting_prettyFollow Caitlin on Instagram @caitlinhasfeels

We love books. And the best part of loving books is sharing them with our friends.So we’re very excited to kick off our book report series — mini-ish episodes where we’ll talk about our favorite books that guide us as parents and people.Our first pick is the amazing What Makes a Baby by Cory Silverberg and Fiona Smyth.Tune in to hear us gush about this book that will help you explain reproduction to your two year old. Then join us on Patreon to request future book reports and share your fave reads!More from us:Follow Rebekah on Instagram @sitting_prettyFollow Caitlin on Instagram @caitlinhasfeelsMentioned in the episode: Ericka Hart, What Makes a Baby, Sex is a Funny Word, You Know, Sex✷ And if you loved this episode, please join us on Patreon for show notes, transcripts + more!

Today we’re taking on the impossible question: do we have another baby? 😵‍💫Caitlin opens us with a beautiful poem from Joy Sullivan, and then we each share the joys, fears, and swirls of question marks coming up as we consider having a second kid.Listen in as we unpack our feelings about fertility, age, baby fever, finances, mental health, desire, and more — including how an oracle card is helping Rebekah figure out her answer.Then join us on Patreon to continue the conversation! We’d love to hear how you’re approaching this question with your families. ♡More from us:Follow Rebekah on Instagram @sitting_prettyFollow Caitlin on Instagram @caitlinhasfeelsMentioned in the episode: Instructions for Traveling West by Joy Sullivan, Haley Brown’s Tearwater Oracle Deck, Why Fish Don’t Exist by Lulu Miller ✷ And if you loved this episode, please join us on Patreon for show notes, transcripts + more!

Alex Wegman is one of our absolute favorite people on (and off) the internet.She’s a writer, storyteller, homeschooling mom of two, and a lifelong wheelchair user who tells stories about life at the intersection of disability, parenting, friendship, and generally existing in public.Everything she shares has deeply impacted how we approach parenting. So we’re thrilled to have her as our first guest on Scratch That!Tune in to hear about:Cultivating independence for parents & kidsDisability representation in Alex’s childhoodConfronting ableist attitudes toward pregnancy & birthDeconstructing the nuclear familyNew scripts for intimacy & home-buildingLearning to love the act of asking for helpIndulging in our joyMore from us & our guests:Follow Alex on Instagram @alexwegman + visit her websiteFollow Rebekah on Instagram @sitting_prettyFollow Caitlin on Instagram @caitlinhasfeels✷ And if you loved this episode, please join us on Patreon for show notes, transcripts + more!

Hello and welcome to Scratch That!We (Caitlin & Rebekah) are so thrilled that you — yes you listening to this right now — are here tuning in to this episode.So we wrote you a letter! And had a quick chat about who we are, why we started this show, and how becoming parents ushered us into a new era of reparenting ourselves and rewriting our scripts for family, motherhood, childhood, and so much more.We hope you’ll press play, subscribe wherever you listen, and join us on Patreon to continue these conversations.xo, Rebekah & CaitlinMentioned in the episode:Basil KincaidScratch That Patreon

Have you ever felt like maybe you weren’t a “real” parent?When we decided to start a podcast, this was the first thing we wanted to talk about — why our brains keep sending us messages that we aren’t “real” mothers.So today we’re sharing the images of motherhood we’ve seen throughout our lives, and digging into how those images are complicated by disability, queerness, and a desire to parent differently.Listen in as we unpack our vision of what a Real Mom™️ should be. Then join us on Patreon to continue the conversation! If you have your own green shoes moment, we’d love to hear about it. ♡More from us:Follow Rebekah on Instagram @sitting_prettyFollow Caitlin on Instagram @caitlinhasfeelsMentioned in the episode: Alex Wegman✷ And if you loved this episode, please join us on Patreon for show notes, transcripts + more!

We’re launching a podcast!!! First episodes of SCRATCH THAT: PARENTING & REPARENTING OFF SCRIPT drop September 30th!Two scrappy midwestern authors, who birthed babies in the early days of the pandemic, walk into a bar. Well, one walks in their chunky doc martins and backward cap, the other rolls in on her Ti-lite chair, rocking teeny tiny bangs.Both challenge the norms of parenthood in their own ways — one with their gender, the other with her body — and carry deep curiosity about what it means to be human. Naturally, these wayward misfits hit record and turned their angst and good cheer at being alive — in these bodies, at this time — into a whole ass podcast.You are cordially invited to join us on this winding exploration. Along the way we’ll be chewing on impossible questions, interviewing people who are also going off script, and sharing the books, poems, and objects that support our quest to parent and re-parent ourselves at the same time.You will always be able to listen on Apple & Spotify, but join us on Patreon (for free) to be part of the conversation (and see our intro videos!)!!