The Kevin Miller Podcast

As you are here, right now, listening to this show, you have survived. No matter what has happened to you, you’ve made it to be in existence at this precise moment with the ability to be listening to a podcast. There are so many, many others who have not made it. Why…have you survived? What is the purpose for you having come this far? This is what propels my guest, Peter Mutabazi who is back for Part 2 as we walk through his personal values, motives, and habits. Here he shares again some of the dramatic abuse and hardship on all levels he endured. You name the abuse, Peter had some of the worst of it. And yet he made it while his list of family and friends who did not only make it but who are no longer even alive, is vast. It is from the fact he survived that he feels his greatest purpose. As you’ll hear him share, he just can’t believe there is not a purpose for why he survived, and he wants to fully use himself to help others not only survive, but thrive. His book that propelled me to have him on the show is called Now I Am Known: How a Street Kid Turned Foster Dad Found Acceptance and True Worth, that to me is one of the best self-help resources I’ve come across in a long, long time, as it blatantly showcases so many of our emotional and relational dysfunctions that Peter endured and is still working through in order to function healthfully and help others do the same. I am also encouraging everyone to visit Peter’s website at Nowiamknownfoundation.org and consider booking him to speak, and helping in his efforts to foster and adopt more children. Nowiamknownfoundation.org. The Self-Helpful podcast with Kevin Miller is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I have a 1984 Jeep CJ7 that barely runs. It only has 90,000 miles and it was driven gently by my mother in law for most of its life. The reason it’s in such bad shape? It just sat still for years on end without being driven. The hoses dry rotted, the lubes dried up, and now it is so decrepit it’s nearly beyond reviving. Our bodies are the same. They were made to move. To have our lungs and muscles stretched. If you’ve ever worn a cast you know how fast muscles and strength atrophies when not used. Our entire body is this way. But today we don’t need to move in order to live. I do most of my work from a home office and to make a good living the most strenuous thing I need to do is walk down the stairs. So, we have to create artificial movement. This is caused…exercise. But what exercises are good? How much is enough? This is my Functional Friday episode where we focus on our health and wellness so we have the physical and mental capacity to help ourselves and others…and today we talk about exercise. I asked this question on Facebook, “How often do you exercise, for how long, what exercises do you do, and why? You are going to hear a lot of ideas and perspectives and I’m joined by my Functional Friday co-host, Randy James, medical doctor and functional medicine expert. We’ll walk and talk you through the responses and offer some counsel and guidance. This is a great show to share with those who struggle with exercise, as we hit on some of the goofiness of it, though of course uphold the necessity. The Self-Helpful with Kevin Miller podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What you are about to hear is more than a story of an abused kid in Africa who ran away from home and then lived on the streets and slept in the sewer in a nearby city. A kid who literally never had anything provided for him, only taken, until he got one big break at age 15 when he had never had shoes. He only ate every few days. He’d never slept in a bed or ridden in a car. But with one man’s help he went to school, attended universities and immigrated to America where today he fosters and adopts children. What I want you to hear however is this is a story relevant to us all because this boy endured such tremendous hardship and difficulty that his escape provides a uniquely stark depiction of the emotional overcoming we all must do if we want to be at peace with the world around us. My guest, Peter Mutabazi was that kid. Today at 48 he’s an entrepreneur, an international advocate for children, and the founder of Now I Am Known, a corporation that supplies resources that encourage and affirm children. Peter is a single father of an adopted white son and foster dad to many. Peter has worked for World Vision and the International Committee of the Red Cross, and has appeared on BBC and the TODAY show. He currently lives in Charlotte, North Carolina where he fosters children and flips homes and has over 200k followers on Instagram at fosterdadflipper. Peter tells his story and lessons in his new book, “Now I am Known” and while I shamelessly promote every guests book, this one is dear to me. He walks through a life of difficulty that will shock you, but ends each chapter with the lessons learned and grace he’s found that will equip and convict you to alter your circumstances or perspective and likely both. Right now Peter is striving to be a full-time, single dad to many kids. If you have an organization, he’s a powerful speaker. Visit Nowiamknownfoundation.org and consider booking him to speak, and helping in his efforts. Right now his growing family needs a new van, a babysitter, and they raise money to provide support for new foster families and kids aging out of foster care. Nowiamknownfoundation.org. The Self-Help(ful) podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As you listen right now, you are likely thinking of hearing or learning something of interest, and something that will help equip or direct you toward more of what you want from life. We are all here striving to grow and better ourselves for an end result. Otherwise you’d just be listening to music or listening to a crime or comedy show. And I’m a full out believer in this concept of learning and growing which is the point of this Self-Helpful podcast. And, I’m ever more interested in seeing a challenge or commitment catapulting our learning curve from zero to hero almost overnight and in some aspects, bypassing all this stuff. Meaning, you can listen to a year of my shows. This summer my book, “What Drives You” comes out, but you can skip that. And instead just make a big commitment to something you care about, and it will do more to shape you than any amount of content, teaching and guidance. This is the message we got from legendary visionary and humanitarian Lynne Twist in her book, "Living a Committed Life: Finding Freedom and Fulfillment in a Purpose Larger Than Yourself.” This is part 3 on Lynne and her message and I invited a special guest to co-host the discussion with me. Jared Angaza is an activist and philanthropist. He spent over a decade in Rwanda and Kenya working to pull women and children out of sex slavery. As of late he has devoted himself to the space industry, specifically Space For Humanity, and advocating the overview effect recently made famous by Star Trek celebrity William Shatner. Those are mere bookends of a life dedicated to big efforts. Jared cites Lynne Twist as a primary inspiration to his life and has lived what Lynne talks about and experienced the devotion to a cause as the most profound tool for shaping him into the kind of person who can make a world impact. Jared is also my full on blood brother. While in Africa he changed his last name from Miller to Angaza to fully embrace his purpose, passion and vision. Following is our discussion on how this message of commitment from Lynne Twist has played out in Jared’s life and the lives of others we’ve walked with. You’ll also hear some brotherly riffing on some past adventures. You can find Jared at Jaredangaza.com, and of course find Lynne Twist’s book, Living a Committed Life, anywhere. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’re in an age when prescription drugs and surgeries are prescribed with little hesitation, especially in the American “healthcare” system. Yet most health minded people, like you who listen to this Self-Helpful podcast, are not so eager to just accept a pill or to go under the knife. I’ve been prone to boycott such things. But my dear friend Randy James, our resident Medical Doctor and Functional Medicine Expert, has taught me there are times when these methodologies are helpful and even necessary. This is my Functional Friday episode where we focus on our health and wellness so we have the physical and mental capacity to help ourselves and others…and today we talk about prescription drugs and surgeries. In a perfect world with perfect health, we’d not need such things. But it’s not a perfect world and none of us can be in perfect health. Sometimes we get injured or sick and relatively broken and then, pharmaceuticals and surgeries are life savers. We’d just like to see those times as very few and very far between. And when they are needed, what can you do to prepare yourself for the best outcomes?The Self-Help(ful) podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How often do we see a movie depict someone bumbling along, not doing so well, lacking in a lot of personal areas…then a big incident happens, and they quickly rise to the occasion, going from hero to zero. I wonder what percentage of movies depict this, the hero story. So we all tune in to all the self-help info, like this podcast, to try and become the hero. But isn’t it interesting that they don’t show this in the movie. They don’t show the person bumbling along and then years of personal development happen to create them into better people. They incident happens. A purpose. And they just get up and forget about themselves to a big degree, and become what’s needed to overcome whatever the incident is. The purpose is what refines them. This is the message of Lynne Twist who I’m back with to discuss her personal values, motives, and habits in the key areas of life fulfillment. You’ll hear, over and over again, how it’s her purpose that directs every area of her life and drives her. You will not…hear any pithy claims or directives, just her humble recount of what she values and how she practices that value…and she comes back over and over to her purpose. Lynne talks about her "unrelenting stand for the possibility of life." Her efforts to have appreciation for her life. Her belief in the omnipotence we all have for the conversations in our life. She sees her body as an instrument she must take care of and in her 70s she's doing parcourse. We really get into her mentioning how you can pick up on someone's mood long before we pick up on their attitude, and I've continued to talk about and ponder this. This and so much more... It’s an incredibly intriguing and for me, convicting conversation. Find Lynne Twist’s brand new book, “Living a Committed LIfe” anywhere, and connect with her at Soulofmoney.org. The Self-Help(ful) podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We as people tend to think of learning and training and preparing, so that…we can commit to something truly big and worthy. A grand purpose. My guest today argues, in the most compassionate way possible, we have it backwards, and that the greatest people ever known simply committed to something they believed in, and the journey within it is what made them great. It crafted and honed them. The challenge and trials and triumphs along the way is what refined them. Then the charge is not to prepare to commit, but to commit now, and become what the commitment requires, along the way. My guest is Lynne Twist, a recognized global visionary and legendary humanitarian. Lynne wowed the world with her first book, The Soul of Money, but I have her on the show for her brand new book releasing currently, "Living a Committed Life: Finding Freedom and Fulfillment in a Purpose Larger Than Yourself.” That’s what caught me, this 180 look at making big commitments. That again, the greats, like Ghandi, didn’t prepare to change the world. They just committed to it and the effort formed them into the people big enough to do it.  Lynne’s story is the same, as her journey began when she heard about the The Hunger Project where their goal was to end world hunger, and knew she was supposed to devote her life to it. She spent a decade there and has influenced more people through more humanitarian efforts than nearly anyone. Lynne has been an advisor to the Desmond Tutu Foundation. The United Nations honored her with a “Woman of Distinction” award. From working with Mother Teresa in Calcutta to the refugee camps in Ethiopia and the threatened rainforests of the Amazon, Lynne’s on-the-ground work has brought her a deep understanding of the social tapestry of the world and the historical landscape of the times we are living in. Over the past 40 years Lynne has worked with over 100,000 people in 50 countries in the arenas of fundraising with integrity, conscious philanthropy, strategic visioning and having a healthy relationship with money. Find Lynne Twist’s brand new book, “Living a Committed LIfe” anywhere, and connect with her at Soulofmoney.org. The Self-Help(ful) podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Here we are striving to motivate and instigate our own good health, and then we have our kids. The cultural norm is to just let them eat, and what they want to eat is what the food industry pumps out to their taste buds. Which I get. As a kid I was eating Lucky Charms and Captain Crunch for breakfast and in my teenage years thought Cheerios and Life cereal were health food. Inspiring kids to eat and live healthy is a massive level of effort. But then, what is our goal? This is my Functional Friday episode where we focus on our health and wellness so we have the physical and mental capacity to help ourselves and others…and today we talk about what we want for our kids. What responsibility do we take for their well being? Are you hoping your kid will someday move out, get a great education, land a job or start a business, make money and raise a family? Then how do we equip them for that? There are no easy answers and in this show Dr James and I discuss the challenges and consequences of fostering wellness in our kids. For context, my cohost Randy James, Medical Doctor and Functional Medicine expert, has three kids in his home between 16 and 12, I have five at home between 17 and 10. And please let me tell you it is always a struggle, so rest assured you won’t hear us brag about our kids happily eating raw carrots and hummus for every meal. But friends I’ve seen the battles with kids and spouses completely sabotage someone's efforts at wellness. This is a big show. The Self-Help(ful) podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Going without close relationships is like going without water. It dehydrates our life and ultimately we’ll die. A slow death of the soul. Yet when we rely on those relationships for our self worth we endure a similar death of the soul. It’s like needing water for life, but drowning in it. This is part 3 of my focus on Melody Beattie, legendary author of Codependent No More. Here I’m with my frequent co-host and dear friend, Randy James, Medical Doctor and Functional Medicine expert and we get real with how to grapple with this tension in our actual lives. A common perspective in close relationships, especially marriages and significant others, is a literal joining of lives. Where “two become one.” But how do we translate this? Is it two separate lives joining to live a new life together, or do the individuals disappear and all that exists are the lives in union? That’s one issue. Another is our self-worth, and the health and necessity to have it in and of ourselves. We naturally look to others to tell us of our worth, starting with our parents and early caregivers, then on to schoolmates, teachers and authority figures, but ultimately most of us land with a significant otherwise devote to and unfortunately, often rely on to give us all the affirmations, acceptance and approval we desire. And this is a recipe for failure. Then there is the issue of loving others. We all valiantly strive to serve and love others, yet generally miss loving ourselves. Can we truly love others more and beyond loving ourselves? It doesn’t generally pan out. This is our discussion and grappling today. The Self-Help(ful) podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you could choose right now what tomorrow would look like, if you had complete freedom, would you rather be consumed with something you are interested in, or be entertained? Really think about it. And you can take it further if you feel exhausted and would just love a day of entertainment. For how long? Two days? A week? A month? I ask because I’m back for part 2 with Melodie Beattie, legendary self-help pioneer and famed author of Codependent No More and we’re talking through her personal Values, Motives & Habits. In regards to spirituality and her overall ethos and purpose of life she said, “My job is to make life interesting, not have life entertained.” Now, I like some good entertainment as much as anyone. I love getting into a great story in a fiction book or movie. Yet I’m aware that when I’m highly interested in something I have little time for entertainment, and when I do read or watch something entertaining, it’s generally about people who are completely interested in something…a cause or mission or purpose. So would you rather voyeuristically watch people interested in something, or be the person interested in something? On a similar note, Melody shared how she keeps a barometer on herself regarding service to others and said, “If I get too selfish my life stops working well” and it showcases her primary interest in…people. I also appreciated her quip to me, saying, “You want the truth or want me to make something up?” She’s as real as they come. Which is why at age 74 one of her personal joys is listening to the Rolling Stones. You can get her newly revised and updated Codependent No More book…anywhere, as it’s currently at the top of the bestseller charts. The Self-Help(ful) podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices