Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman

In a deep dive into modern dating culture, the discussion critiques checklist dating and its impact on real connections. Listeners discover why the attractiveness of 'bad boys' may be more about temporary thrill than genuine desire. The Nice Guy Nine offers practical tips for meaningful engagement, such as creating presence, enhancing eye contact, and embracing unpredictability on dates. The episode encourages shifting away from superficial metrics toward true values-based dating, empowering individuals to rewrite their love stories.

This week, Damona takes on a question from longtime listener Vernee, who’s back in the dating scene after a hiatus… and hitting a wall when it comes to finding someone who shares her political and social justice values. Vernee asks: "I'm politically progressive, very values-driven, and living in a purple state. I've tried everything — hints in my profile, direct chats — but nothing’s working. Where are the men who believe what I believe?" If you’ve ever wondered how to communicate what matters without scaring people off — or how to find someone who’s actually aligned — this one’s for you. In this episode: • Why dating apps might feel harder now than they did just a few years ago • How political identity and core values have become deeply intertwined • What to say in your profile (and what to leave out) • Why texting about politics rarely works — and what to try instead • Where to meet values-aligned people beyond the apps • The line between staying open-minded and lowering your standards Submit your question: call or text 424-246-6255 Follow Damona on IG: @damonahoffman Get your free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com Order F the Fairytale on Amazon, B&N, or from your local bookseller Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dating today isn’t always smooth sailing. There’s ghosting, bad first dates, texting traps... and if you’re feeling stuck in the same old dating loops, you’re not alone. In this Dates & Mates Master Class, Damona Hoffman breaks down the eight most common dating mistakes she sees after 15+ years of coaching singles, and shares actionable fixes to help you date smarter, not harder. Whether you’re tired of swiping, struggling to make real connections, or caught in negative self-talk, this episode gives you the clarity and tools to reset your dating approach. What you’ll learn: How to stop ghosting, and stop getting ghosted The danger of “obliga-swiping” and how to date with intention Why texting too much before a date kills chemistry The power of refreshing your dating profile regularly How to overcome negative self-talk and fear of starting over Why having a dating plan beats waiting for a fairy tale If you have questions about your love life, Damona wants to hear from you. DM her on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook @damonahoffman or leave a voicemail at 424-246-6255 for a chance to have your question answered in an upcoming Dear Damona segment. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Damona Hoffman breaks down one of the most important moments in dating—the first date—and how to make it count. Whether you’re getting back out there or swiping with new optimism, this episode shares how to set yourself up for success so that first date leads to a second. Damona covers everything from whether to Google your date to how long a first date should really last, what to wear, where to go, and how to follow up. She even shares seven fun, low-pressure first date ideas that help build real connection. What you’ll learn: How long a first date should actually last Why dinner dates don’t set you up for success The value of a pre-date phone call (and when to do video) What to wear to make the best first impression How to choose a first date location that creates connection Seven easy, fun, and affordable first date ideas If you have a relationship or communicationquestion you’d like answered on a future episode, send Damona a DM on Instagram, Facebook, or TikTok @damonahoffman or leave a voicemail at 424-246-6255. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

REWIND: Dear Damona – Besties’ Bro & Never Been Kissed In this standout Dates & Mates Rewind episode, Damona tackles your real dating dilemmas with her signature no-nonsense advice. From navigating awkward crushes to handling tricky conversations about intimacy, this episode is packed with guidance to help you date with clarity and confidence. If you’ve ever wondered what to do when your boyfriend avoids sex, how to approach dating when you’ve never been kissed, or whether it’s okay to filter for men with degrees, this episode has you covered. You’ll also hear Damona’s take on modern challenges like dating someone with an OnlyFans account, dealing with phones on dates, and whether fudging your age on apps is ever worth it. What you’ll learn: How to stop hiding behind dating app filters and set meaningful standards What to say when intimacy is missing in your relationship When it’s time to stay or go in a relationship that feels stuck The truth about age on dating apps — and whether honesty is really the best policy How to navigate dating when you feel inexperienced Setting boundaries when your partner has an OnlyFans or a highly public life If you have your own dating question, Damona wants to hear from you. Send a voice memo on Instagram @damonahoffman or leave a voicemail at 424-246-6255 for a chance to have your question answered in an upcoming Dear Damona segment. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Dates & Mates, Damona Hoffman rewinds to her 400th episode featuring a guest who helped inspire the show from the start: the legendary Dr. Drew Pinsky. Dr. Drew has spent decades giving love, sex, and mental health advice on Loveline, Celebrity Rehab, and now on his podcast Ask Dr. Drew, which he co-hosts with his wife of over 30 years. In this vulnerable and heartfelt episode, Dr. Drew shares his personal journey through a seven-year on-and-off courtship, what finally made him ready for commitment, and how he and his wife maintain a strong marriage after decades together. Plus, he joins Damona to answer your dating questions in a special extended Dear Damona segment. What you’ll learn: Why emotional readiness matters more than "the one" How to navigate on-again/off-again dynamics with clarity When to disclose a medical condition or disability to a new partner Why gratitude and daily check-ins are key to long-term love What makes someone feel "unapproachable" in dating and how to shift it How to know when you're ready to date after trauma or burnout This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most timeless and transformative conversations from the Dates & Mates archive. Subscribe now to catch every Rewind drop and our Spring bonus episodes the moment they go live. Listen to more of Dr. Drew on the Ask Dr. Drew podcast and follow him @drdrewpinsky. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Dates & Mates, Damona Hoffman rewinds to one of her favorite conversations with love coach and viral content creator Shaun Galanos. Shaun is the host of The Love Drive podcast and has become a rising voice in game-free, radically honest dating advice—and this episode shows you exactly why. In this raw and radically honest episode, Shaun and Damona go head-to-head on the dating games that hold us back, how to ask for what you want in bed, and what to do when someone won’t give you a straight answer. From emotional stonewalling to the pressure of dating app perfectionism, they unpack it all. What you’ll learn: Why radical honesty is the only dating strategy worth mastering How to bring up uncomfortable topics without pushing people away What stonewalling actually says—and how to respond to it How to explore kink, sexual compatibility, and deeper intimacy with confidence Why optimizing for the “perfect” person might leave you lonely How to hold your power as a strong woman without dimming your light This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. Listen to Sean on The Love Drive podcast and follow him @thelovedrive on Instagram and TikTok. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We are back with a no-holds-barred Best of Dear Damona episode—because when it comes to texting mishaps, mixed signals, and dating curveballs, this one hits home every time. In this candid conversation, Damona answers some of your juiciest dating dilemmas—from the accidental text that lands in the wrong inbox to what it really means when someone texts you “hey you” at 11:30 PM. She shares smart, compassionate advice on navigating confusing signals, staying grounded, and owning your truth in the dating game. What you’ll learn: How to respond and recover when you send the wrong text to your date Whether it’s okay to ask for better photos—and how to do it playfully The real timeline for exclusivity (spoiler: you don’t have to rush) Why it’s okay to date multiple people—and how to know when to choose How to disclose chronic conditions or disabilities with confidence Why shared values matter more than shared hobbies This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. DM Damona your questions on Instagram @damonahoffman or text 424-246-6255 to be featured on a future episode. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Damona breaks down the 5 core dating “loops” that keep singles stuck and the step-by-step strategies that lead to lasting love. With over 15 years of experience coaching thousands of daters, Damona shares how clarity, mindset, and follow-through can radically shift your dating outcomes. If you’ve been swiping without success, burning out on first dates, or unsure where to even begin, this episode offers a simple and strategic path forward. What you’ll learn: The five most common dating loops and how to break them How to avoid burnout by dating with clarity and purpose Where to actually meet the right people (online and IRL) Why your dating mindset matters more than your profile This is a special masterclass edition of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates archives. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. Want to go deeper? Learn more at DamonaHoffman.com Join the Dating Accelerator Program Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Fan favorite, Dr. Orna Guralnik, renowned psychoanalyst and host of the hit Showtime series Couples Therapy, shares what decades of clinical work have taught her about love, connection, and unconscious patterns in relationships. In this conversation, Dr. Orna also opens up about the societal shifts reshaping modern intimacy, the difference between psychoanalysis and surface-level self-help, and why listening, real, curious listening, is a radical act in partnership. What you’ll learn: How your unconscious motivations shape relationship patterns Why privilege must be acknowledged for real connection to happen How to create transformation in a partner without “fixing” them Why curiosity is the first step to emotional healing This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. Catch Dr. Orna in Couples Therapy (streaming now on Showtime) Follow her @ornaguralnikNYT Essay – “I’m a Couples Therapist. Something New Is Happening in Relationships” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices