Playing With Fire

Conversations about de-escalation can stir up a lot of fear—change freaks us out!—but things are always changing in our relationships, especially when we’re exploring non-monogamy and untangling ourselves from the fairy tale, rom-com version of love. De-escalation doesn’t always have to be a sudden, slam-on-the-brakes change—we discuss how de-escalation can be a pragmatic, intentional way of attending to what the situation actually needs, instead of following the traditional relationship stepladder. We share some of our own experiences of escalating and de-escalating our relationship, we talk about our ongoing processes of questioning and re-imagining the cultural narratives of breakups, and we discuss the challenges of navigating parenting and relationship changes. JOIN The Year of Opening community for a full year of learning & support. Registration is open now at ⁠⁠⁠www.TheYearOfOpening.com⁠⁠⁠ Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at ⁠www.JoliQuiz.com⁠ Get the answers you want to create the open relationship of your dreams! ⁠Sign up for an Ask Me Anything here⁠ Music: Dance of Felt by ⁠⁠Blue Dot Sessions

What if you didn’t have to cut yourself off from your own toxic attractions? Sounds ridiculous, right? I MUST have to go cold turkey on my romanticization of a**hole behavior. But what if exploring them took your personal growth journey to the next level? In this episode, we’re diving deep into why that kinky stuff is so yummy, and what you can do to leverage your toxic romanticizations into growth + fun. We’re joined by Sunny Megatron, a sex, kink, and BDSM educator and media personality, and we get into all the juicy details of how exploring taboo subjects can actually help you express yourself, explore your unconscious, form stronger boundaries, regain a sense of agency, and process past traumas. Sunny Megatron is an award-winning Sexologist, Kink & BDSM Educator, Certified Sex Educator and Relationship Coach, and media personality. If you haven’t followed her socials yet, you’re really missing out! JOIN The Year of Opening community for a full year of learning & support. Registration is open now at ⁠⁠⁠www.TheYearOfOpening.com⁠⁠⁠ Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at ⁠www.JoliQuiz.com⁠ Get the answers you want to create the open relationship of your dreams! ⁠Sign up for an Ask Me Anything here⁠ Music: Dance of Felt by ⁠⁠Blue Dot Sessions

Conflict happens. Especially when differentiation and individuation are parts of your personal and relational journeys. And that’s a good thing! Enter Imago Dialogue, a communication tool created by Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt. Not only can it transform your communication, using Imago Dialogue can transform conflict into more connection. Whether you’re practicing Imago Dialogue with a romantic partner, family member, or friend, the core idea behind it is something a lot of us have talked about before: I want to feel understood. I want you to understand me! We walk through the steps of Imago Dialogue, but we also go deeper and talk about how you can set yourself up for success. We talk about practical tools, like emotional regulation techniques, to use before and after your conversation, and we walk through an entire real-life, real-time example of using Imago Dialogue. Learn more about Dr. Harville Hendrix’s and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt’s work here: www.HarvilleAndHelen.com Get the support you NEED to have the open relationship you WANT in my year-long group program, The Year Of Opening. Go here now >>> www.TheYearOfOpening.com Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at www.JoliQuiz.com

You can be fully immersed in polyamory, living and breathing the non-monogamous lifestyle, and still be stuck in a monogamous mindset. If you feel split, conflicted, like you’re living in bifurcated parallel universes between different partners, you’re not alone. The paradigm of monogamy runs deep in our society, so it’s no surprise that many people have a hard time breaking out of monogamous internal frameworks, even when so much of their lives reflects their polyamorous identity. That’s why this conversation is so important—we're talking about shaking away the stigma and learning how to find and process your internalized polyphobia. Get the support you NEED to have the open relationship you WANT in my year-long group program, The Year Of Opening. Go here now >>> www.TheYearOfOpening.com Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at www.JoliQuiz.com

Have you ever felt like you’re caught in a mix of jealousy and compersion? Like you want to be happy for your partner, but there’s also this feeling of jealousy tugging at you? You are so not alone. Dr. Marie Thouin has joined us on Playing With Fire before, but this time is extra special, because we’ve coined a new word for that conflicted feeling—comperstruggle! And we’re telling you all about it. Making the transition from comperstruggle to compersion isn’t always easy, but in this episode we go deep into how self-care, working with your emotions, and strong agreements and communication with your partners can make all the difference while you navigate this challenging space. Go to WhatIsCompersion.com to book a FREE 30-minute session with Dr. Marie Thouin, and to download her compersion worksheet Follow her on Instagram @love_insight_dating⁠⁠ Read more about comperstruggle on my blog⁠ JOIN The Year of Opening community for a full year of learning & support. The waitlist is open now at www.theyearofopening.com Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at www.JoliQuiz.com

If you’re at the beginning of your non-monogamy journey, or if you’re feeling a little stuck and you don’t know where to turn for community, this episode is for you. We’re joined by Emma and Fin from the Normalizing Non-Monogamy Podcast to discuss all things community. We talk about why community is so important for people who are exploring non-monogamy, the challenges that come with the process of finding and building community, communication and connection in long-term relationships, coming out, balancing authenticity and safety while navigating different social contexts, conflict, privacy, and how all of these things might impact your own personal growth and self-care journeys. Normalizing Non-Monogamy isn’t just a podcast—it’s also a thriving virtual community of people from all around the world. Click here to check it out! JOIN The Year of Opening community for a full year of learning & support. Registration is open now at ⁠⁠⁠www.TheYearOfOpening.com⁠⁠⁠ Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at ⁠www.JoliQuiz.com⁠ Get the answers you want to create the open relationship of your dreams! ⁠Sign up for an Ask Me Anything here⁠ Music: Dance of Felt by ⁠⁠Blue Dot Sessions

Struggling with your own jealousy?  Partner struggling with jealousy? Friends/community arguing about how to handle jealousy? This episode was MADE for you. The jealousy roadmap emerged directly from my qualitative research on jealousy. Since then I’ve put it to the test with hundreds of people- it works.  And I want you to have it for free because jealousy is a normal emotion and you deserve to feel empowered to work with jealousy proactively. You’ll also want to download >>>The Jealousy Roadmap Workbook HERE BONUS!!! If this gets you excited, take the next step and download The Jealousy Masterclass — a 3-hour seminar and 30-page workbook perfect for continuing your jealousy shadow work  50% off because I LOVE that you are diving into your jealousy work!   GET THE JEALOUSY MASTERCLASS 50% off Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at www.JoliQuiz.com Stuck on step 5 of the jealousy roadmap? Nurture Compersion by checking out Dr. Marie Thouin's work at www.WhatIsCompersion.com

How does it go for you to show up with all your unique you-ness? Of course some of you is private, but it can be tricky to bring the rest of you out into your relationships. We talk with distinguished psychotherapist and renowned speaker Rachel Wright about our various experiences being out as our individual selves. For more from Rachel: ⁠www.rachelwrightnyc.com⁠ ⁠The Wright Conversations podcast⁠ Instagram: ⁠@thewright_rachel⁠ Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at ⁠www.JoliQuiz.com⁠

There are things you can do to build intimacy in your relationships, and things you can do that can break it down. We're talking about wording agreements and commitments in ways that avoid leaving back doors you can sneak out of. and leave you present to your partners and yourself. And what can happen if you don't. Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at www.JoliQuiz.com

Do the limited choices on the mainstream relationship menu leave you feeling restless and looking for something else? Do you think something more customized would suit you and your partners or partner better? I hear you, so we're talking with guest expert Carrie Jeroslow, host of Relationship Diversity Podcast. We talk about solo-amory, the line between monogamy and non-monogamy, embracing discomfort, the value of intention in relationships - we packed a lot in here. Click here to download a free guide to explore Relationship Diversity Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at www.JoliQuiz.com