Conversations from the Heart

Why do some people leave you feeling small, confused, or ashamed, even though they smile, laugh, and seem perfectly nice?In this powerful coaching conversation, Jaya explores what happens when charm and condescension hide behind friendly facades. Together, we name the impact of what I call narcissistic fallout: the lingering disorientation that surfaces when unresolved trauma meets relational manipulation.We explore:•Why some conversations feel like being hypnotized•The nervous system effects of subtle emotional control•How to spot power moves disguised as “concern”•What to say (and how to exit) when someone laughs at your pain•The inner work of breaking free from spells of confusion and controlYou’ll leave this episode with:•Practical language to protect your power•A somatic metaphor to stay grounded (the oak tree)•A gentle reminder that your grief holds your clarityThis is an episode for anyone reclaiming their voice after emotional gaslighting or enmeshment, and learning to walk away from people who don’t feel safe in their nervous system. SHOW NOTES•[03:10] How past trauma shows up in confusing conversations•[07:20] What is “narcissistic fallout” and how does it hijack your power?•[10:15] Why charming people can leave you feeling ashamed•[14:30] Practical phrases to interrupt manipulation mid-conversation•[20:50] “The porcupine and the ring” — a metaphor for protecting yourself•[22:00] The Jungle Book python & the hypnotic quality of old patterns•[26:40] What to do when you keep trying to be liked by people who harm you•[32:10] How to support your inner teenager during relational triggers•[37:00] Somatic tools for staying rooted in your power•[39:00] Sample exit scripts you can use to protect your nervous systemResources & Links:•Join the Truth Over Comfort live workshop on August 14th (6–8pm CST): Register here.•Free Communication Starter Kit•Learn more about the Conversations from the Heart Membership ProgramLoved this episode?•Subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify•Share it with a friend who’s navigating confusing relational dynamics•Sign up for my weekly newsletter at yvetteerasmus.com for more emotional wisdom & tools For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

In this episode, I coach a listener named Julia who feels dismissed after bringing up a difficult experience in therapy. Her therapist tried to normalize it by offering logic instead of empathy and now Julia’s wondering how to bring it up without creating conflict or being misunderstood again.Together, we explore:•How to ask for more empathy in therapy (without blaming or shaming)•What it means when a therapist skips emotional attunement•A gentle script you can use when therapy feels misaligned•What to do if your therapist can’t or won’t meet you where you areIf you’ve ever walked away from therapy feeling more alone than connected, this episode offers tools, language, and hope.Stay till the end for a practical how-to guide on navigating these tough moments. Because asking for what you need in therapy is often the most healing work you’ll ever do.In this episode:[02:00] How do I tell my therapist she didn’t really hear me?[04:00] The difference between empathy and normalization[07:00] When therapists fix too fast, and why it hurts[09:00] A script to name misattunement without escalation[12:00] How the therapy relationship becomes the real work[14:00] Post-session how-to guide: 6 steps to naming what’s not working in  For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

What do you do when someone you care about paints you as the villain?Maybe you spoke your truth, and they called it manipulation.Maybe you set a boundary, and they called it narcissism.Maybe you asked for something you needed, and they said you lied.In this raw, real, and emotionally honest episode, Yvette walks two callers through the heartbreak and confusion that comes when our intentions are misunderstood and our character is questioned.We talk about:* How to respond with clarity and compassion when someone accuses you of lying or narcissism* What an apology actually means, and how to offer one without self-erasing* The difference between empathy and enabling (especially with adult children)* Scripts for repair conversations when the other person won’t talk to you* How to protect your nervous system while still keeping your heart openIf you’ve ever been stuck between wanting to make things right and needing to stay safe, this one’s for you.Stay till the end for:* A word-for-word apology template you can adapt to your own life* How to spot the real need underneath an accusation* Why the most generous thing you can do… might be walking awayListen now and discover how to stay in your truth and your tenderness—even when someone else can’t see who you really are. For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

What if joy coexists with discomfort? This conversation dives into navigating mixed feelings without the need to resolve them immediately. It emphasizes genuine communication and self-connection, balancing kindness with assertiveness. Listeners learn to reclaim their voices while standing up against power dynamics and societal pressures. The hosts discuss the importance of embracing discomfort as a pathway to personal growth and integrity, illustrating how it’s possible to find peace amidst life’s messiness.

In this episode, we listen as Nate opens with a deeply human inquiry:What can I do to feel more regulated, more considerate, and less internally violent while driving?What unfolds is a rich exploration of road rage, internalized judgment, overstimulation, and the longing for care in a world that often feels aggressively indifferent. The conversation weaves together Nonviolent Communication, inner child work, trauma-informed insight, and the power of spiritual reframing.Takeaways:Driving can surface deep, unconscious wounds about safety, visibility, and being cared for.There’s a difference between coping with a dysregulating world and designing a life that actually supports you.The wish to be “unaffected” is often a defensive maneuver to avoid overwhelm or pain,but true regulation requires learning how to metabolize life, not numb to it.“Right and wrong” can become tyrannical ideas when inherited from domination systems. Replacing them with “what meets needs” offers deeper integrity.Empathy begins by reclaiming your relationship with your own interior world.Everything (yes, even rush hour) can become a spiritual dojo. For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

This discussion dives into the chaos of inner voices battling for attention, highlighting the struggle between ambition and peace. Listeners hear about the importance of emotional regulation and the healing journey after betrayal. The conversation touches on navigating judgment in relationships and embracing self-compassion. With insights on self-advocacy and overcoming external validation, it encourages a journey toward authentic self-expression and community connection, inviting participants to address their inner conflicts and seek support.

Explore the emotional labyrinth of guilt and regret, as Judy grapples with self-blame over her grief while trying to craft a condolence letter. Georgia faces the dilemma of setting boundaries amid fear of losing a friendship due to late cancellations. Discover life-changing reframes of regret, communication scripts for honesty without defensiveness, and how embracing your 'too muchness' could protect your tenderness. Dive into the nervous system's role in friendship repair and enjoy surprising metaphors to change your perspective on connection.

What if the reason your relationships feel hard isn’t because there’s something wrong with you, but rather because you’re waking up and getting more conscious?  In this tender, truth-filled episode, we meet Carol and Paulina, two women navigating the messy terrain of rebuilding self-trust after giving too much of themselves away in past relationships.Carol is considering reconnecting with a longtime friend who’s consistently prioritized his comfort over their mutual care. She wants reciprocity but keeps accommodating the status quo, hoping it’ll inspire change. Together, we explore the hidden cost of chronic self-abandonment and what it takes to risk doing things differently.Paulina, meanwhile, is mourning the loss of a toxic relationship that activated every part of her attachment system. She feels flat, emotionally shut down, and unsure if she can ever love again. Her current relationship is kind, stable… and unfamiliar. We unpack the difference between trauma chemistry and real connection, and how to trust love that doesn’t feel like chaos.If you’ve ever confused anxiety for attraction, or found yourself resentfully staying in a dynamic that doesn’t meet your needs, this episode is for you.You’ll learn:How to stop over-functioning in lopsided relationshipsThe difference between behavior and intention, and which one to trustWhy real love might feel boring at first (and why that’s a good thing)How to reclaim your yes and no without shameAnd how to grieve what never was without losing your capacity to love againListen in for practical tools, emotional wisdom, and the gentle nudge you may need to come back to yourself. For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

What do you do when someone you love keeps using emotional blunt force instead of listening? When the men in your life still believe criticism is caring, or that dominance equals dialogue?In this week’s episode, we sit with two brave women learning how to communicate with men who are still playing by old, outdated rules where vulnerability is weakness, power is control, and connection gets sacrificed for the illusion of authority.We explore what it means to keep our hearts open without abandoning ourselves, to name what hurts without making someone wrong, and to build bridges without betraying our own inner truth. You’ll hear real-life moments, fresh language to try, and permission to stop performing “good girl” energy just to keep the peace.In this raw and real episode, two women ask:How do I stay in connection with someone who keeps hurting me?Why do I freeze or fawn when I know better?SHOW NOTES: Why old-school masculinity often shows up as dismissal, control, or withdrawalHow women often internalize the pressure to stay sweet, silent, and obedientWhat to say (and not say) when our boundaries are being ignoredThe art of exiting a conversation with grace and powerHow to bring “bad girl” energy back into wholenessThis episode is for anyone tired of talking to a wall, and ready to start listening to themselves.🎧 Tune in now, and reclaim your voice, your power, and your peace. For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

Struggling to reconnect with a friend after drifting apart? This engaging discussion offers heartfelt scripts for mending those bonds. Learn how to approach conversations when emotions run high, especially if the other person is still hurt. The podcast dives into the importance of owning your feelings while navigating shame and guilt. Real-time coaching explores the complexities of friendship ruptures, emphasizing vulnerability and emotional maturity as keys to rebuilding trust. It's a masterclass in healing relationships, one heartfelt conversation at a time.