FilmDrunk Frotcast

The best moments of the FilmDrunk Frotcast from 2015! Edited by Token, donate a few bucks for his time at https://www.paypal.me/TokenAudio. Guests featured: Laremy Legel, OJ Patterson, Jane Harrison, Steve Post, Kaseem Bentley, Torio Van Grol, Jason Dove, and Matt Ufford. 00:10 – All the times we told Laremy to shut up. 02:25 – Bret’s Face-Turn, in which he decides to become a shill. 03:14 – Mama’s Little Piss Boy (Ep 269)10:39 – Brandon Fromfreemont (Ep 244)15:11 – Corporate Birthday (Ep 270)18:09 – Bret hates Viral Marketing (Ep 241)23:06 – Startup Castle Closes/Lieb’s Brain Feed (Ep 255)27:29 – Uptown Girl Game (Ep 259)33:59 – The Lieb Brother’s Shoplift (Ep 271)44:22 – Idaho Tinder Names (Ep 256)54:12 – Slut Shaming the Black Widow (Ep 248)1:04:41 – The Elusive Female Urethra/Italian Fathers, Irish Mothers (Ep 272)1:14:21 – Jaden Smith and Aerosmith (Ep 272)1:23:21 – Office Kevin (Ep 262)1:28:49 – 50 Shades of Lieb (Ep 238)1:32:53 – Name of the Year Draft Bios (Ep 243)1:36:00 – Jack White Pens a Letter/Jupiter Ascending’s Beeus Ex Machina (Ep 239)1:40:10 – Oliver Stone’s Snowden (Ep 255)1:48:00 – Technology of Future Past (Ep 273)1:55:10 – The Game’s Instagram Erotic Fiction2:05:17 – Lieb’s Brother (Ep 271)

It’s a special edition FilmDrunk Frotcast! Where we actually discuss and review a movie! Justin Halpern and Pat Schumacker from Shit My Dad Says, Laremy Legel from Film.com, and comedian Matt Lieb join (Vince Mancini from FilmDrunk) to talk about Star Wars: The Force Awakens. Obviously, there will be Star Wars spoilers. Topics include: Hey, whats up with the Force? Who is Rey’s father? Does Luke Skywalker ever use the force to jerk off? Why is Kylo Ren so bad at being a bad guy? And finally, Adam Driver: Surprisingly not Jewish. Enjoy, and we’ll be back with a best-of next week.

Is Creed the first boxing movie about a black boxer? The fact that none of us can think of another one says enough. This week we talk Creed, and about Hoodslam, the pro wrestling event we went to in Oakland, play the royalty-free music freestyle challenge, discuss The Big Short, and get an update from Ben, now that he’s back in the country. This week’s Frotcrew: Vince Mancini, Matt Lieb, and SF comedian by way of Somerville, Massachusetts, Stevie Post. 6:32 – Talking Creed. Is Sylvester Stallone actually a good actor? Vince takes pro, Stevie Post takes the con. 24:15 – The Royalty-Free Music Freestyle Challenge. Matt Lieb debuts his Randy Newman impression.28:20 – HOODSLAM. Matt and I discuss attending our first live pro wrestling event since making Whoop Dreams at the Gathering of the Juggalos. 39:58 – Ben joins us via Skype. 44:24 – Matt talks about his time in terrestrial radio, and this week’s meme: “If radio had been invented after the internet, it would be the biggest thing ever.”51:35 – Donald Trump. Do we should try to shout him down, or stop feeding the troll?1:03:40 – Ben discusses his travels through Europe. 1:10:50 – Matt becomes extremely adamant about preferring the “perfect woman, but with a penis” over a masculine man, but with a vagina. “I’m not attracted to men, but I am not un-attracted to dicks.”1:25:00 – The Big Short. Remembering the mortgage crisis, and the idea of the open-source true story movie. 

This week’s show: Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice trailer. Superhero movie fatigue. The Night Before. Brooklyn. The Leftovers (plus Damon Lindelof, Lost, Prometheus). Fargo. Jaden Smith. Old-timey renditions of classic rock songs. Enjoy! 3:30 – Breaking down the Batman v Superman trailer.12:00 – We talk superhero movie fatigue, and why all the superheroes have to fight each other now. Can’t they just be friends?!16:30 – Personal stories with Matt Lieb: Making out with his RA to the sound of Tracy Chapman and Maroon 5, and “The Ghosts of Boners Past.” 20:45 – Matt has some conspiracy theories about the female anatomy vis a vis where the pee comes from. 29:54 – Matt Lieb saw The Night Before, which we discuss briefly, before launching into Brooklyn, which he also saw.42:15 – We rank Thanksgiving side dishes. 53:00 – The Leftovers. Is it so good that everyone has to take back all the crap they talked on Damon Lindelof?1:04:00 – Brendan and Matt plug Fargo.1:09:00 – Jaden Smith’s book of “modern day philosophy” in which he plans to discuss “string theory and chaos theory, but more mystical.” This leads us to “Jaden Smith Bingo,” to determine if we can anticipate the life cycle of a psuedo-celebrity meltdown/evolution into ersatz guru. Discuss.1:19:30 – Lots of singing for some reason.1:21:45 – Brendan tests his theory about a 30s phonograph version of Aerosmith’s “Rag Doll.” It was very silly. Sadly, we learned of Scott Weiland’s death five minutes after we finished recording.

Did you do terrible things to a sibling or have one do terrible things done to you? Comedian Matt Lieb recounts the saga of his Machiavellian brother, who ridiculed his genitals, made him steal, and ruined his sketch comedy show. As an only child, I drink the pathos and schadenfreude of him and the many listeners who submitted their stories. Other topics include The Night Before (quickly diverted into a diatribe about Anthony Mackie), the Ronda Rousey fight, and our personal spam bots, which Bret has created using our Twitter archives. Spooky. Comedian Kaseem Bentley joins, back by popular demand, to go on lengthy diatribes against Terrence Howard and Hawaiian barbecue, among other things. Enjoy. 2:20 – We relive last weeks’s greatest hit, “Corporate Birthday.” 7:40 – I ask Matt and Kaseem about ‘The Night Before,’ which leads Kaseem into a long jag about Anthony Mackie being “the number one black douchebag.” 10:10 – I distract Kaseem with a question about Terrence Howard, which brings us to the story about Terrence Howard’s father killing a guy and Terrence Howard’s controversial theories about crystals and universal math.17:05 – Kaseem outlines his theory that Terrence Howard is actually an alien who was sent through “a Negro Stargate.” 20:39 – We talk about the Rousey fight. No, Ronda Rousey did not get “exposed,” you dolts.26:15 – Kaseem goes in hard on Hawaiian BBQ. I ask about the Nation Of Islam’s dietary restrictions.30:52 – The Rousey fight reminded Matt of Million Dollar Baby. 39:00 – Introducing the topic of Sibling Abuse, starting with listener emails.44:00 – Probably the most diabolical sibling torture email we received, about a brother almost drowning his younger brother, using him as bait for a pedophile, and covering him in dog poop. 48:22 – The lengthy saga of Matt Lieb’s Machiavellian brother begins.1:03:00 – Personal Spam Bots: Following up on last week’s discussion of predictive text and Markov chains, Bret has used our Twitter archives to build us personal spam bots. 1:15:00 – Matt Lieb tells an epic story about sketch comedy and his evil brother, culminating in “Spedackle.”1:22:55 – Matt’s story about the last time his brother punched him (while he was watching Taken), and once again diabolically neutralized his counter attack. 1:33:00 Finishing off with a few of your emails

It’s the James Bond episode! After seeing Spectre, I asked around to find out which were the “can’t miss” James Bond movies, and more than one person suggested The Spy Who Loved Me (1977), starring Roger Moore. We invited back fan favorite Jane Harrison, to try to see classic ’70s sexism through the eyes of an actual millennial female. That was the idea, anyway. The undisputed highlight of this week’s episode was the return of “Matt Lieb Adds Lyrics To Royalty-Free Music.” 1:45 – Matt and Jane have the same therapist, who apparently sees half the San Francisco comedy community. 5:00 – Matt Lieb tells us all about the comedic stylings of famous anti-Semitic French comedian, Dieudonné M’bala M’bala.11:30 – Bond discussion begins. Matt Lieb reveals The Spy Who Loved Me is his second ever Bond movie. Jane explains to the dudes why Daniel Craig is sexy.13:15 – Matt Lieb claims women didn’t find him attractive until Adam Driver. 15:10 – We get an update from Ben! Or try to, until we realize his message has been horribly garbled. 29:13 – Matt and I admit to not “getting” Drake (shocking, I know). Jane explains “Hotline Bling.” 34:44 – Bret shows up, and the return of “Matt Lieb Improvises Lyrics To Royalty-Free Songs.” 39:06 – Matt improvises “It’s Your Corporate Birthday,” easily the best song in the history of Matt Lieb singing royalty-free music. 46:45 – We let autocorrect compose texts for us, just to see what kind of personal spam our individual word clouds produce.50:00 – Autocorrect composes lyrics to royalty-free music.53:00 – Matt reads The Game’s erotic eggplant Friday fiction. #PunchinThatMonkey58:00 – Back to The Spy Who Loved Me in earnest.1:04:00 – We bring Spectre into the mix. Not too spoilery. 1:07:00 – Is Bond creepy or rapey?1:12:30 – Matt Lieb talks about his brother stealing his food and spitting on his sandwiches. LISTENER ASSIGNMENT FOR NEXT WEEK: Send me your stories of horrible sibling torture. frotcast@gmail.com. 415 275 00301:20:00 – Answering listeners’ relationship questions. (No poop stories this week, shockingly).1:29:00 – We go deep with Jane Harrison, all about her parents and cocaine, which leads into an earnest discussion of The Male Gaze. (See? Matt leaves and we immediately get serious).

We’re back! This week, we listen to Ben Carson’s campaign songs (country AND rap), go down the Todd Starnes rabbit hole, discuss Project Greenlight and The Leisure Class, and comedian Joe Sinclitico joins to discuss his own experience making independent film. Vince Mancini, comedian Matt Lieb, and co-host Bret are all in studio. 00:00 – We decide Bret looks like either a ’20s stockbroker who’s been in an opium den for weeks or Howard Hughes, which leads us to a discussion of our favorite Scorsese movies. 14:00 – We listen to Ben Carson’s incredible new campaign songs and his beliefs about Joseph building the Egyptian Pyramids. Matt Lieb turns Ben Carson’s campaign song into “Uptown Girl.” 25:00 – We discover Fox News contributor Todd Starnes, aka Mama’s Little Piss Boy. We read excerpts from his books, God Less and ‘They Popped My Hood And Found Gravy On The Dipstick.’ I swear to God that’s a real book (with foreward by Mike Huckabee). 35:40 – Joe Sinclitico joins via Skype. He tells a story about his friend running into Roz from Game of Thrones at Astro Burger. 50:00 – We discuss Project Greenlight and the Project Greenlight movie, The Leisure Class. Whose fault is it that it’s so bad? 1:16:00 – Joe tells us about his experience starring in a micro budget feature in El Paso, and we read your emails. Enjoy!

Bret and Brendan join FilmDrunk’s Vince Mancini in the Frotquarters as we talk to ‘Sad Bastard’ author Lee Keeler, Justin Bieber’s nudes, Playboy, the Steve Jobs movie, Greg Hardy and domestic violence, and how to get “dad woke.” 2:30 – Justin Bieber’s penis pics, and the phenomenon of celebrity parents’ saying super creepy things about their kids. 7:25 – The Tod Maffin Update! We still don’t know for certain that #Content #Marketing expert Tod Maffin is a real person and not a robot, but we love him. Somehow all of his friends all sound like Tim & Eric/Pynchon characters.9:30 – We try to sing Nine Inch Nails’ “Closer” with our mouths for some reason.17:35 – Lee Keeler, comedian, writer, producer, joins us to talk about ‘Sad Bastard: Practical Wisdom For the Modern A$$hole.’ The first non-aspirational men’s magazine.41:20 – Playboy drops nudes. We discuss how advertising is building us pigeonholes and the compartmentalization of desire. 52:00 – One of our favorite subjects, Bryant Gumbel sounding like an obnoxious douche.54:00 – Brendan leads us into a discussion of Greg Hardy and the NFL’s trouble with domestic violence. Brendan coins the term “Dad Woke.” 1:02:00 – ‘Steve Jobs,’ and Aaron Sorkin. Is there anyone else so simultaneously talented and infuriating? 1:19:15 – EMAILS. We advise a listener (probably badly) who wants to know how to hit on a girl in his film class.

Comedian Matt Lieb joins FilmDrunk’s Vince Mancini and Bret to talk The Leftovers premiere, Commando’s 30th anniversary, kayak lady, the worst Matt Damon editorial ever written, and how online marketing is trying to ruin English.  2:00 – Matt tries to defend John From Cincinnati 4:00 – Matt quits Talk 9, gets a farewell from Gary From Fremont. “Is all of life, just repeating the mantra ‘This is what I wanted?'” 5:20 – Commando talk 10:49 – Bret and Matt try to guess how many people get killed in Commando.  14:00 – We finally talk about the Kayak Bear Lady, which hit just after we recorded last week’s show. Matt provides the voice of the bear. 17:42 – WELCOME TO TECH HELL. Are online marketing “gurus” trying to destroy English? We go down the terrifying rabbit hole. Sample sentence: “Content marketing providers will focus on solutions partners.” 38:27 – My story about how I put a couch on the street and accidentally created an artificial reef for hobos. 40:55 – We’ve discovered the world’s hottest Matt Damon hot take, “Earth to Matt Damon, It’s 2015.” 54:00 – John From Cincinnatti. Turns out Matt Lieb was the one guy who liked this show. 55:00 – The Leftovers, and is it just going to Lost us? (It’s a little spoilery, I suppose, but pretty vague).  1:00:00 – Bret’s bizarre sex dreams, “where I’m pushing a little sea lion around in my palm.”  1:08:10 – Your emails and voice mails. 

Matt Damon thinks gays should stay in the closet!? Tyrese thinks Vin Diesel should direct Furious 8?! The Blackberry CEO had an aneurysm? All this and more in this week’s #Frotcast #Content. Film.com’s Laremy Legel joins FilmDrunk’s Vince Mancini, with veteran Frotcasters Bret and Brendan this week.Opening – Brendan rants about Draft Kings, and also NFL. 7:19 – Song of the week, the slow cover of Smash Mouth’s “All Star.”8:33 – The CEO of Blackberry wins the all-time prize for terrible tech speak.11:00 – We try to figure out how tech speak got so bad. 13:45 – Brendan discovers Slack. We discuss the phenomenon of one tech company that does the exact same thing as another one being worth a billion dollars. 18:08 – Laremy’s articulate thoughts on ‘Everest.’ 22:37 – This week in misleading thinkpiece headlines: Matt Damon thinks gays should stay in the closet (or does he?)32:05 – Danger Guerrero’s pitch for “Zoo Heist.” 37:20 – My encounter with a “social media expert,” and her expertise regarding #Brands. We invent a new social media job – Doggregator. It’s someone who’s an aggregator of dog Instagrams. 42:00 – Brendan experiences Soul Cycle and other milennial exercise trends.45:30 – An emailer explains the origin of Coors Light’s ad campaign (note: I’m not going to fact check this). 50:00 – Laremy reads his list about Everest.56:37 – Yet another listener with a smug bidet story. 1:00:00 – The fascinating existence of Tyrese Gibson1:14:00 – People naming their children “Katniss Everdeen.” We scour the best seller list to find out who we could’ve been named after.1:16:00 – What caused this week’s Brendan’s laughing jag? Tyrese calling himself “Voltron Chairman.”