The Michelle Chalfant Show — Life from the Adult Chair

Michelle Chalfant

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Jun 30, 2016 • 35min

040: Finding the Motivation to Change with Dr. Ted Klontz

We all get lost. It's perfectly natural as human beings to get stuck in the forest, to get scared of the dark, to get lonely and feel our courage drift away. As our guest today so rightly shares, "we have to get used to the weirdness of being human beings." That's when we're able to find the strength, the motivation, the courage to make change in our lives and approach the world with strength. I'm so excited to introduce you all to Dr. Ted Klontz. Ted is a psychologist based in Nashville and he's here today because he's a pioneer in the development and application of tools and techniques that help people to change their troublesome behaviors. He's an author, having written or contributed to six books on Behavioral Finance, and is co-founder of Your Mental Wealth™ and the Financial Psychology Institute™. He's a published researcher, speaker, trainer and facilitator, and he travels the world working with professional athletes, entertainers, high profile families, couples, and individuals, as well as the average citizen. As a participant in Ted's workshops I can tell you first hand that his work is truly transformational, and I'm proud to introduce him to The Adult Chair audience today! Links & Notes Dr. Ted Klontz Ted's Courses at Creighton for Financial Services Professionals
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Jun 16, 2016 • 39min

039: Addiction & Forgiveness in the Home

This week's show comes courtesy of a listener with some incredibly important questions around addiction, living with family suffering with addictive behaviors, and forgiving an emotionally distant parent. These are HUGE questions, as you can imagine, but unfortunately all too familiar issues for so many of us. We have a two part answer on the show. First, my own story, which I hope you can relate to and learn from. Second, I offer some of the tools and the framework you'll need to move through the chairs, and walk through negative feelings into forgiveness. Thank you so much for writing in and keep those questions coming! Links & Notes Bataka Bats
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Jun 2, 2016 • 25min

038: Who's sitting in my Adolescent Chair?

Just because we might be considered adults chronologically doesn't mean we're always acting our age! That's the psychological trick of the Chairs, and this week I hope to give you all some clarification. Our goal here is to uncover where we are at any given moment, which chair we're using to relate to the world, and get to know that part of us free from judgement. Our Adolescent Chair is here to protect you. Get to know it, thank it, then let it know that you've got this and can move into your Adult Chair. Today, we're talking about finding that Adult Chair before the trap door closes and we're stuck using our more limited adolescent skills, and we define some of the skills required to maintain our sense of center and stay in our Adult. Links & Notes Belly Breath: Diaphragmatic Breathing
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May 19, 2016 • 45min

037: Dr. Dodge Rea — Introducing the GRACE Sequence

It is with great pleasure that I introduce to you Dr. Dodge Rea, the originator of The GRACE Sequence. This is one of the most powerful, easy-to-use techniques for emotional relief that I have found. I am always on the hunt for tools to help get us unstuck and in our Adult Chair — the GRACE Sequence is one of those tools. Let's face it, life can be hard. We get stuck and can fall victim to the pitfalls of life that lead to emotional pain from which we can't get out of it. Dodge has collected a one-of-a-kind, easy-to-use set of tools that helps with getting us unstuck. If you are struggling with something and can't seem to find relief, try the GRACE Sequence — I believe you will be just as amazed as I am. About Dodge Rea Dodge is an integrative clinical psychologist in Nashville. He is the co-founder of the Lotus Center, a holistic health center there, and is the originator of what's become known as the GRACE Sequence, which he has taught to various groups and organizations, including the One-River Wisdom School, as well as individuals for about 10 years now.
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May 5, 2016 • 29min

036: Mindfulness and Sitting with our Negative Emotions

You can't heal negative emotions. They exist, and we all move in and out of them throughout our days, weeks … our whole lives. But with an understanding of the power of mindfulness, it is possible to come to terms with our negative emotions, and to find peace, solace, and understanding. This week on the show, we're talking about both the internal and external tools you can use to sit in your negative emotions free of judgment and shame. Join us for this conversation, and let's all invite our emotions to tea! Links & Notes Belly Breath: Diaphragmatic Breathing
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Apr 21, 2016 • 49min

035: Parenting in the 21st Century — Growing Healthy Teens with guest Dr. James Wellborn

Dr. James Wellborn is a clinical psychologist who specializes in individual, family, and group psychotherapy with children and adolescents addressing the range of challenges faced by families and teens during this period of development. In addition to his practice, he's served as a consultant in schools developing programs to support at risk youth, and he's a strong advocate on radio, TV and print in helping parents support their child's healthy development. Dr. Wellborn is author of "Raising Teens in the 21st Century: A Practical Guide to Effective Parenting" that serves as a reference for parents address a whole host of teenage issues, and he's here to talk to us today about the challenges teens face in learning to live in their own Adult Chair. As our guest today, Jim joins to help us continue our conversation on conscious parenting, this time from the perspective of our teens. From anxiety and social pressures, to technology and networks, to access to porn and other adult material that we're still learning to counsel through, this conversation is for all parents learning to help their kids transition to healthy adulthood! Links & Notes Raising Teens in the 21st Century: A Practical Guide to Effective Parenting @jamesgwellborn on Twitter jamesgwellbornphd.com
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Apr 7, 2016 • 28min

034: How do we become Conscious Parents?

Becoming a conscious parent means getting to know yourself well enough that you don't let your own emotions get in the way of understanding who your kids are growing up to be. That's harder than it sounds, and requires you to sit firmly in your Adult Chair the older they get. This week on the show, I've got five strategies that will help you not only relate to your kids without judgment, but understand them and protect them, too!
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Mar 10, 2016 • 24min

033: Mastering Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a deeply personal thing. But whether you label yourself as a "forgiving person" because you're afraid of conflict in the adolescent chair, or living in an authentically forgiving place in the adult chair is determined first and foremost by whether we're allowing ourselves to feel our feelings! So many of us are afraid of our feelings, afraid of the way our emotions move through us. This week on the show, we're talking about how to see inside ourselves from the adult chair, to move clearly into the truth, and move forward with strong relationships with the people you with whom you're seeking a forgiving relationship.
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Feb 25, 2016 • 51min

032: Returning to your Seat of Power

Some days, it just feels like the world is conspiring against you. These are the days that shake our confidence, our sense of peace, our ability to relate to others — they're the worst! The trick to living in The Adult Chair is not developing some magical skill to erase these days from your life. It's developing the skill to recognize when you've been knocked out of The Adult Chair, and to move yourself back into it to rediscover your Seat of Power! Today on the show, I'm sharing my own Day of Days and some key strategies I use to find my way back to my Adult Chair. And as a special bonus, listen all the way to the end for a conversation with Nancy, a client who has so graciously allowed me to record her work in moving back into her own seat of Power. If you're interesting in the real, practical work that goes into living into the Adult Chair, you can't get any more real than this!
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Feb 12, 2016 • 16min

031: Learning to Date Yourself

It's February! With all the talk of love in the air leading into this Valentine's Day weekend, we thought it just the right time to share our own spin on romance: learning to date yourself! This is such an important concept, and it challenges one of the fundamental marketing messages of romantic partnership: the truth is, we don't find a partner to complete us! That's a trap! Don't fall for it! This week, we'll tell you all about it, and give you the tools you need to date yourself first, so you'll be a better partner for someone else!

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