Sexology

Welcome to episode 88 of the Sexology Podcast, today I’m delighted to welcome back Steve Bodansky (he was a guest on episode 59) to the podcast, this time Steve speaks to me about his new book Love and Alzheimer’s, the changes that Steve and his wife Vera went through after she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and recommendation’s for couples struggling to deal with Alzheimer’s.     Steve Bodansky together with his wife Vera have been teachers of Sensuality for the past 35 years. They met in 1980 and were married in 1983. Steve received a Master’s in Molecular Biology at SUNY at Albany in 1979 and a Doctorate at More University in Sensuality in 1992 with an emphasis on female orgasm. He first studied and then taught at More U. thru 1992. Vera started doing one-hour orgasms demonstrations in 1980 and also received her doctorate in Sensual studies in 1992.     Steve became certified to do these demonstrations in 1987. They developed another orgasm school in 1992 after leaving Morehouse called The Welcomed Consensus where they taught for 5 years and certified 5 new students into becoming teachers and demonstrators of orgasm.     For the past 22 years they have been coaching students as a couple and started writing books about optimum sensual pleasure. They have trained many people over the past 30 years with courses and personal training and continue to do so. A number of their former students have become sensual facilitators themselves.     In this episode, you will hear:     The changes that Steve and Vera went through after she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's  How Vera has maintained her sexuality through this process   The dynamic changes that have happened to the relationship after the Alzheimer’s diagnostic   How writing his new book Love and Alzheimer’s helped Steve through the changes   The ways in which Steve and Vera have strengthened their connection despite the ongoing challenges  Recommendation’s for couples struggling to deal with Alzheimer’s     Resources  stevebodansky@gmail.com  http://www.orgasmmatters.com   https://www.amazon.com/Love-Alzheimers-Steve-Bodansky/dp/1546560823   http://www.emotionsinharmony.com     Survey - https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/MCM62XY    https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 87 of the Sexology Podcast, today I’m joined by Sonalee Rashatwar who talks to us about the concept of sexual colonization and what it means, the ways in which sexuality and low desire can be affected by the societal demands of needing to have “the perfect body” and what we can do to create more body inclusive sex education.   Sonalee Rashatwar (she/they), MSW, LCSW, MEd is an award-winning social worker, sex therapist, adjunct lecturer, and grassroots organizer. Based in Philly, she is a fat queer nonbinary therapist working as a sexual violence crisis counselor, specializing in treating sexual trauma, body image issues, racial or immigrant identity issues, and South Asian family systems, while offering fat and body positive sexual healthcare.   Popularly known as TheFatSexTherapist on Instagram, their fame hit an all time high when they were featured on Breitbart in March 2018 for naming thinness as a white supremacist beauty ideal. Sonalee is a sought-after speaker who travels nationally to curate custom visual workshops that whisper to our changemaking spirit and nourish our vision for a more just future.   Sonalee is not paid for her labor as a community organizer, where she has fundraised and facilitated a free 5-day political action summer camp for LGBT+ South Asian and Indo Caribbean youth. Sonalee received their Master of Social Work and Master of Education in Human Sexuality from Widener University in 2016 and have been working in the field of anti-violence for 7+ years.   In this episode, you will hear:   The concept of sexual colonization and what it means How many different voices and people of different backgrounds haven’t been represented in research The ways in which sexuality and low desire can be affected by the societal demands of needing to have “the perfect body” How many people are mis-informed around these issues and what we think should help people, often makes things worse Recommendations for changing your internal dialogue What we can do to create more body inclusive sex education Understanding and knowing your biases around diet culture     Resources https://www.sonaleer.com https://www.instagram.com/thefatsextherapist https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care https://twitter.com/oasis2careAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 86 of the Sexology Podcast, today we talk about a listener’s email around the subject of masturbation and why her husband still feels the need to masturbate whilst in a marriage.      In this episode, you will hear:     How wanting to have separate fantasies away from the relationship can lead to more masturbation   The stigma around this issue, studies have shown very few women know their partners masturbate frequently   Why sexual boredom can increase masturbation frequency   How masturbation can be used as a self-regulator for relief   Understanding that this is a very common issue, but there is currently limited studies and data to know more   Steps that can be taken to address this issue     Resources  http://www.sexologypodcast.com  https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/0092623X.2014.958790 https://site.themarriagebed.com/sexuality/masturbation/solo-masturbation-in-marriage/ https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 85 of the Sexology Podcast! Today, we are joined by Midori who talks to us about how she began her journey into sex education, learning to add new elements to your sex life gradually and recommendations to express power exchanges in the bedroom.    Midori is a renowned sexuality educator, author, and artist based in San Francisco. She emerged from the Sex Positive Movement in San Francisco in the early 1990’s, soon becoming a much sought-after international presenter on sexuality, personal fulfilment, and kinky adventures.    Her reputation as an authority and leading expert on alternative pleasures stem not only from her unique and entertaining process of teaching concrete skills but in her ability to deconstruct and distil complex matters of desire into surprisingly accessible lessons with eloquence and humanity. She’s known for tackling challenging topics with fresh and relevant insights. She calls this her “head-heart-hands” method to create a space where people are allowed individual self-exploration. Fundamentally she is motivated by helping people to create authentic and intimate relationships while emphasizing self-actualization, shame reduction, acceptance, and justice. Native of Tokyo, Japan, she brings a unique perspective to creative self-expression, pleasure and authentic living.    Her writing is extensive, ranging from numerous articles, columns, works of fiction, to instructional books. She is the author of " The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage", the first English language book on Shibari. She also wrote hot instructional essays in "Wild Side Sex", and the darkly erotic science fiction, "Master Han's Daughter".     She leads transformative small group intensives, including Rope Dojo ®, ForteFemme: Women’s Dominance Weekend Intensive and Passionate Bonds: Creating Effective D/s Protocol. When she's not traveling and teaching, she's creating provocative and haunting art and performances.    In this episode, you will hear:     How Madori began her journey into sex education   Why bondage isn’t necessarily a form of art   The need to enjoy your sex life and live in the moment of it   The way in which movies, books and other forms of media can warp our view of the reality of sex   Learning to add new elements to your sex life gradually   Stripping away the stigma and falsehood that the majority of people don’t practice BDSM   Understanding the pain aspect of BDSM   Recommendations to express power exchanges in the bedroom       Resources  https://fhp-inc.com   Ted X Talk - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXiekEoMrvI   Survey - https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/MCM62XY  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 84 of the Sexology Podcast, today I’m joined by Timothy Wienecke who talks to us about the way in which masculine identity gets tied into military service, how masculinity can manifest in positive and negative ways and the importance for veterans to work with their partners to overcome these issues.   Timothy Wienecke has spent the last decade training and educating in a variety of settings on a broad range of topics. He got started as a primary trainer for various technical positions as a Signals Analyst working with the NSA. That is where he realized he enjoys giving people the skills and knowledge they need to be effective in the places that are important to them. Timothy's command noticed his passion and tapped him for a more delicate and difficult task to be a primary trainer for the Air Force’s Bystander Intervention program. There he spent the next three years training over 3000 Airmen how to notice and engage effectively to stop harassment and sexual assault before it happens. In recognition of his efforts, Timothy earned many accolades, ranging from Airman of the Quarter to Early Promotion and an Air Force Achievement Medal for impact. The enjoyment of these tasks is what led him to leave the Air Force and enter the mental health and advocacy fields full time.   After leaving the military, Timothy became employed as a peer educator for the Auraria Campus and the facilitator to launch Colorado University at Denver’s Peer Advocates for Veteran Education program. He took the skills gained in the military and learned how to connect with traditional college students, university staff, and the business community. Timothy taught and developed curriculum for time management, communication skills, gender dynamics, bystander intervention, cross-cultural communication, military culture, and many other topics over his three years in those positions. Again, people took note of Timothy's passion, skill, and effort; naming him the Feminist Ally of the Year, awarded a Life Time Achievement Award by the Phoenix Center at Auraria, and he left campus as the Outstanding Graduate of the CU Counseling program.   Since leaving the Auraria campus, Timothy has jumped into the greater Denver community to continue empowering people with the skills, knowledge, and drive to move themselves and their organizations toward their goals. He has trained Fire Fighters how to maintain focus and cope with the trauma they see in the world, taught clinicians the knowledge needed to serve men and the veteran community, and helped corporate employees focus in and communicate to complete their goals as a team.   In this episode, you will hear:   The way in which masculine identity gets tied into military service How masculinity can manifest in positive and negative ways The difference between the way civilians and people in the military experience trauma and sexual abuse The differences males and females experience sexual abuse and trauma How men can be more vulnerable when it comes to sexual abuse and trauma The importance for veterans to work with their partners to overcome these issues   Resources https://empoweredchangece.com   Survey - https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/MCM62XY   https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care https://twitter.com/oasis2careAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 83 of the Sexology Podcast, today I’m joined by Alexandra Katehakis, Ph.D., L.M.F.T. who talks to us about the common misconceptions about intimacy after recovery, the difference between healthy sex and addictive sex and incorporating your values into your sexuality.     Alexandra Katehakis, Ph.D., L.M.F.T. is Founder and Clinical Director of the Center for Healthy Sex in Los Angeles, Senior Fellow at The Meadows, faculty for the International Institute of Trauma and Addiction Professionals, and the recipient of the 2018 IITAP Leadership and 2012 Carnes Award. She is a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist/Supervisor and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist/Supervisor specializing in the treatment of sexual addiction and other sexual disorders.     Dr. Katehakis is author of Sexual Reflections: A Workbook for Designing and Celebrating Your Sexual Health Plan (2018), Sex Addiction As Affect Dysregulation: A Neurobiologically Informed Holistic Treatment (2016), co-author of the 2015 AASECT award-winning Mirror of Intimacy: Daily Reflections on Emotional and Erotic Intelligence (2104), contributing author to the Clark Vincent award-winning Making Advances: A Comprehensive Guide for Treating Female Sex and Love Addicts, in M. Feree (Ed.) (2012), and author of Erotic Intelligence: Igniting Hot Healthy Sex After Recovery From Sex Addiction (2010).    In this episode, you will hear:     The common misconceptions about intimacy after recovery   Why Alexandra encourages people to explore their sexuality after recovery   The difference between healthy sex and addictive sex   How sex addiction is often a re-enactment of trauma   Incorporating your values into your sexuality   Understanding your sexual template   How Alexandra helps people create a sexual health plan   Creating a sexual framework that both partners can be happy with   Understanding the connection between your body and mind through recovery    Survey - https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/MCM62XY      Resources  http://centerforhealthysex.com   https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 82 of the Sexology Podcast, today I’m joined by Christine Macinnis who speaks to me about she became interested in working with transgender people, the best ways and practices we can all support transgender people and the issues they face when coming out.    Due to over 20 years working in local schools as a school counselor, Christine brings a unique perspective to her work in private practice. She loves assisting the adolescent through the trials of depression, anxiety, school and learning issues, gender and sexual identity confusion, and the adjustment to college and launching from their family.     In addition to her work with teenagers, Christine has a passion for the challenges and celebration of sexual and gender identity for all age groups. As a Certified LGBT-Affirmative Psychotherapy Provider, she has supported several transgender clients and families as they progress through the process of transition and acceptance. In terms of support outside of our sessions, Christine can be a strong educational advocate for her client's needs and is well versed in the IEP/504 plan process to support students academically. She is also an expert in college and career planning for teens.    In this episode, you will hear:     How Christine became interested in working with transgender people  The way in which transgender people experience an additional layer of stigma   How therapist’s biases can play into people’s processes of sexual orientation   Supporting parents in understanding difference between their child being curious or aligning with gender identity   The best ways and practices we can all support transgender people   How unfortunately transgender people have the highest rates of suicide and self-medication   The issues transgender people face when coming out   The need to question and overcome societal biases against transgender people     Resources  Phone – 1310 683 9047   Email – macinnis.christine@gmail.com   https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 81 of the Sexology Podcast, today is a solo episode where I’m going to share some personal and revealing stories about my own experience with sex therapists.     In this episode, you will hear:     How difficulties with sex affected a previous relationship   The ways in which this led to seeking out sex therapy   The difference between sex therapy, sex educator, sex surrogate and sex coaches   How our educational systems lack good information on sex   The need for patients to understand what it is they want to work on   Understanding what can get in the way psychologically to stop you experiencing pleasure   How it’s ok to receive sex therapy as a couple or on your own   Knowing how to choose the right sex therapist for you     Resources  https://oasis2care.clientsecure.me/client_portal   https://oasis2care.com/torrance/find-right-therapist-los-angeles-ca/  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 81 of the Sexology Podcast, I’m delighted to welcome back Dr. Ari Tuckman who joined me on episode 79. In this episode, we talk about the fidelity agreement, how technology is changing our fidelity agreement and what gets in the way of having these conversations?    Dr. Ari Tuckman is a psychologist and Certified Sex Therapist based in West Chester, PA. He writes the Sex Matters blog on PsychologyToday.com.     He has given more than 350 presentations across America and in nine other countries.     He also specializes in diagnosing and treating ADHD and recently finished his fourth book, based on research he completed on the relationship and sexual satisfactions of couples where one partner has ADHD.     In this episode, you will hear:     What is a fidelity agreement?  How what is considered cheating for some couples, isn’t for others   The need for independence on your thoughts and desires   How is technology evolving our fidelity agreement?  Making a sustainable agreement between you and your partner about what is and isn’t ok   Understanding that sexual desires change and evolve over time   What gets in the way of having these conversations?    Resources  https://tuckmanpsych.com   https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/sex-matters   https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to episode 79 of the Sexology Podcast, today my guest is Dr. Ari Tuckman who talks to us about Teledildonics, the common ways people use this technology and what the future will hold as this technology continues to grow.     Dr. Ari Tuckman is a psychologist and Certified Sex Therapist based in West Chester, PA. He writes the Sex Matters blog on PsychologyToday.com.     He has given more than 350 presentations across America and in nine other countries.     He also specializes in diagnosing and treating ADHD and recently finished his fourth book, based on research he completed on the relationship and sexual satisfactions of couples where one partner has ADHD.     In this episode, you will hear:     What does Teledildonic mean?  The huge variety of technology for remote sex where tactile sensations that’s now available   How Teledildonics could help prevent cheating   The common ways people use this technology   Ways in which to incorporate Teledildonic to increase novelty into your relationship   The off-shoot benefits Teledildonic can have   How Teledildonic can help increase intimacy in long distance relationships  The potential downsides of using this technology   The future of Teledildonics and what we can expect to see    Resources  https://tuckmanpsych.com   https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy