Dear Dr. Tracy

In this mini session, Dr. Tracy and her husband Greg debunk the myth of "Happy Wife, Happy Life." They argue that true happiness in a relationship should not come at the expense of one's own well-being. They emphasize the importance of having difficult conversations and maintaining a genuine friendship within the relationship. They also touch on the necessity of self-awareness and curiosity in resolving conflicts and highlight that we can only control our responses, not our partner's actions. Ultimately, they stress the importance of authenticity and mutual respect in building a healthy, balanced relationship.Listen to the full episode here:Spotify Apple Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In a world where we're encouraged to prioritize individualism, and set boundaries, the importance of our relationships can often get lost. In this week's episode, Dr. Tracy chats with Dr. Stan Tatkin, a renowned clinician, researcher, and author of the bestselling book "Wired for Love." They explore the concept of interdependence in relationships, using the three-legged race analogy to highlight the importance of teamwork. Dr. Tatkin emphasizes understanding our own and our partner's brains to foster secure and functioning relationships, addressing the impact of negativity bias and the pitfalls of social media diagnoses. They touch on secure attachment, the couple bubble, and aligning on priorities for lasting connections. Dr. Tatkin shares insights on conflict resolution, mutual relief during disagreements, and maintaining a strong partnership through mutual sensitivity and understanding. This conversation offers practical advice and profound insights to help listeners build resilient and loving relationships, highlighting why it's actually ok to put your relationship at the top of the priority list.  Be sure to follow Dr. Stan on Instagram and grab a copy of “Wired for Love” here.  Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.comLinks:Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this week's mini session, Dr. Tracy is joined by Dr. Morgan Anderson to discuss the challenges of relationship repair through the lens of attachment styles. They explore how individuals with anxious attachment struggle with distance, often engaging in anxious pursuit and abandoning their own needs to regain a sense of safety. These individuals must learn to self-soothe, such as by taking a walk or doing a task, and become comfortable with discomfort. Whereas those with avoidant attachment deactivate their feelings and needs, pushing away closeness and often wanting to sweep conflicts under the rug. For the avoidantly attached individuals, the focus should be on self-soothing while learning to turn toward their partner, asking for reassurance, and setting clear boundaries. Both attachment styles face unique challenges in repairing relationships, but understanding and addressing these patterns can lead to healthier and more resilient connections.Listen to full episode here:Spotify AppleFollow Dr. Morgan Anderson on Instagram! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this week's solo episode, Dr. Tracy tackles a topic that affects many of us but is also something that is very near and dear to her heart, and that is perfectionism. She explains how perfectionism is more than a desire to do well, often becoming a relentless pursuit of flawlessness that can harm our mental health and relationships. Dr. Tracy explores the internal and external roots of perfectionism and introduces the concept of urge surfing, a technique used to manage the impulse to be perfect. She shares five practical tips for managing perfectionism that have helped her: raising awareness, stepping into discomfort, practicing self-compassion, challenging negative self-talk, and embracing acceptance. Through her personal experiences and professional expertise, she aims to provide support to listeners in navigating their struggles with perfectionism to foster a healthier, more balanced life.  Links:  Download Dr. Tracy’s free guide to overcoming imposter syndrome at www.drtracyd.com/imposter If you are looking to find clarity in your business and want to sign up for the Empower Her retreat you can visit www.drtracyd.com/retreat  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.comLeave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you dealing with a narcissist or someone with chronically defensive tendencies? In this session, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Jaime Zuckerman explore the key differences between a chronically defensive person (non-narcissist) and a full-blown narcissist. The session delves into the behavioral contrasts, highlighting that defensive partners lack malicious intent, whereas narcissists are often intentionally harmful. To wrap up, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Jaime offer insights on managing relationships with both non-narcissistic and narcissistic partners. Listen to full episode here:Spotify Apple Follow Dr. Jaime on Instagram! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Did you know that 69% of divorces are initiated by women? In today’s episode, we’re going to gain insights on why this is the reality. Join Dr. Tracy and guest Kate Anthony, author and host of the Divorce Survival Guide podcast, as she shares her expertise on the pivotal decision many women grapple with: "Should I stay or should I go?" Having personally navigated an emotionally abusive marriage, Kate understands better than anybody the importance of creating a safe, supportive environment for children caught in the crossfire, the power toxicity holds, and why divorce doesn't ultimately "screw up" our children. She discusses the disproportionate emotional and domestic labor women often shoulder in heterosexual relationships and why women are left exhausted by the time they reach their breaking point. Kate also encourages women to reconnect with themselves in order to make empowered decisions moving forward in their lives. Tune in for a conversation filled with essential perspectives on nurturing healthier relationships and personal well-being.  Be sure to follow Kate on Instagram, visit her website and listen to her podcast here! Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.comLinks:Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this session, Dr. Tracy and Matthew Frey discuss a crucial issue that affects many relationships: defensiveness. They explore how defensiveness not only creates barriers but also diminishes and invalidates your partner's feelings. Matthew shares a personal revelation from his own life, noting how his failure to validate his wife's experiences contributed significantly to the deterioration of their marriage. He highlights that understanding doesn't require agreement but rather a mindful consideration of another's perspective. Listen to full episode here:Spotify AppleFollow Matthew on Instagram! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this incredibly important episode, Dr. Tracy welcomes Dr. Frank Anderson, a renowned trauma expert and author to discuss the profound impact of trauma on personal development and well-being, as well as insights from his latest book, "To Be Loved: A Memoir of Truth, Trauma and Transformation," exploring the journey towards healing and forgiveness. The two kick things off by highlighting the importance of therapists sharing their vulnerabilities and human-ness to bridge the gap between them and their clients. Frank delves into how trauma is really just absorbed energy from our experiences with others and why that energy doesn't actually "belong" to us. They also touch on the power of forgiveness in healing trauma, emphasizing that it allows us to let go of negative emotions and see the humanity in others, including ourselves. This episode is a deep dive into understanding trauma’s role in shaping our lives and how embracing our true selves through healing can lead to profound transformations.   Be sure to follow Dr. Frank on Instagram and grab a copy of his book here!   Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.comLinks:Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, Dr. Tracy and her favourite co-host/hubby, Greg, are back and here to tackle one of the most common issues couples face in relationships: why bringing up one problem with a partner often leads to a flood of additional grievances. They discuss why this might happen, identify defense mechanisms and avoidance strategies, and emphasize the importance of understanding and communication in relationships. They introduce the metaphor of a "bridge" between partners and the importance of integrating regular relationship "check-ins" as crucial for maintaining connection and preventing relationship explosions. They also address some listener questions, offering insights into managing different parenting styles and in-law tensions and stressing the importance of empathy, patience, and individual growth in a relationship. Tune in solo or listen with your partner for the wisdom you didn't even know you needed!  Be sure to listen back to their “relationship check ins” episode here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.Links:Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this deeply relatable episode, Dr. Tracy sits down with Julie Chavez, an elementary school librarian from Northern California and the author of the USA Today bestselling memoir "Everybody but Myself." Julie opens up about her journey from prioritizing everyone else's needs to understanding the crucial importance of self-care, a lesson learned through her own struggles with anxiety and depression. Together, Julie and Dr. Tracy dive into the transformative power of therapy, the discipline and "work" required to maintain our mental health, and how changing her own patterns impacted her marriage and family dynamics. Tune in, and discover why your joy is worth your time. Be sure to follow Julie on Instagram and visit her website here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.Factor - Head to factormeals.com/inys50 and use code inys50 to get 50% off. Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.Links:Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices