Two Bi Guys

Vaneet is back, and since his last visit to Two Bi Guys, he wrote his first book, "Bisexual Men Exist: A Handbook for Bisexual, Pansexual and M-Spec Men" -- available now wherever books are sold! We chatted about the process of researching, writing, and promoting his book before diving into its contents: Bi+ representation in media, coming out, dating and relationships, M-Spec intersectionality, what "M-Spec" means and why Vaneet wanted to use an "agnostic" term like that in his book's title, how queerness crosses over between sexuality and gender, how to find pride in a Bi+ or M-Spec identity, and much, much more.If you've listened to this podcast before, you probably already believe that Bi+ men exist, but in Vaneet's book, this is the BEGINNING of the conversation, not the ultimate message. We exist, AND once we get beyond convincing people of this basic truth, there's so much more to discuss and learn about our community. Listen for an in-depth, free-flowing, true Bi+ 2.0 conversation, featuring two bi guys!There are over 25 minutes of bonus content with Vaneet on my new Patreon -- we chatted more about dating and the huge variety of relationship styles among the Bi+ community, why certain relationships can be considered a success even if they eventually end, Bi+ invisibility in mental and sexual health research, intersectionality with a focus on the asexual and aromantic spectrums, and more about the challenges of writing Bi+ books in general and what we’d like to see more of in the Bi+ activist space. Subscribe here: www.Patreon.com/RobertBrooksCohenThanks for listening!Buy Vaneet's book: https://us.jkp.com/products/bisexual-men-existFollow Vaneet on IG: https://www.instagram.com/nintendomad888/Get 20% off Liquid I.V. -- https://zen.ai/APzgr1I0sD6_kQntndiKfA

I finally got to interview Jessica Fern, author of one of my favorite books, "Polysecure"! I've been reading and re-reading this book for a couple years now, and it has helped me enormously in navigating polyamory and understanding how my own attachment style might affect various partnerships.In this interview, we discussed Jessica's bi identity and poly journey, why the intersection between polyamory and attachment theory is so important, the SPECTRUM of attachment styles (rather than four distinct categories, as it is often framed), why monogamy has been seen as a cultural ideal (and how that's changing today), why non-monogamy can feel threatening to some people (and how to work through that), the SPECTRUM of boundaries and how to course-correct when we go too far in either direction, love as an infinite resource or muscle that can grow, the SPECTRUM of non-monogamous relationship styles (noticing a theme...?), pervasive poly-negativity and the importance of finding like-minded community, how transitioning from monogamy to polyamory can change your attachment style, where jealousy comes from and how to use it to deepen a relationship, and how to have secure attachment with yourself.There are five extra minutes of bonus content only on Patreon in which we continued talking about jealousy (and other things we’re taught to repress from a young age), as well as why polyamory is “relatively insecure” compared to monogamy -- and why Jessica thinks that can actually be a good thing. www.Patreon.com/RobertBrooksCohenVisit www.JessicaFern.com for info on her books, seminars/webinars, psychotherapy practice, coaching, and more.Get 20% of Liquid I.V. -- https://zen.ai/APzgr1I0sD6_kQntndiKfA

Welcome to Season 6 of Two Bi Guys! Our premiere episode features Zachary Zane, back for his second Two Bi Guys interview, and we discussed his awesome new "memoir and manifesto", BOYSLUT.We chatted about sexual shame, the relationship between porn and queerness, kinks, fetishes, dom/sub dynamics, Zach's book tour and the surprising "controversies" that have popped up, the joys of anal stimulation -- when done correctly (and how to do that), why it can be beneficial to come out if you're married and monogamous, unlearning what society teaching us about sex, rejection, therapy, lube, and much more!Can't get enough? There are 20 extra minutes of bonus content with Zach on my new Patreon (found here: https://www.patreon.com/robertbrookscohen -- or find the link in our social media bio). There, we talked about Zach’s pornstar boyfriend, our thoughts on starting our own OnlyFans (and possible collaboration...), sexual queerness v. cultural queerness, non-monogamy and polyamory, and the play parties Zach has been hosting in NYC, Boyslut and Bislut. Thanks for listening!Use my special link https://zen.ai/QysyWDhMy1HLyR-9UhkgCQ to save 30% off your first month of any Zencastr paid plan.

Happy season 5 finale! We finally got to chat with Maz Hedgehog (they/them), a UK-based bisexual writer, poet, and performer working in the spaces between real and unreal, poetry and theatre, self and other. We chatted about Maz’s bisexual journey, how they realized they were agender and what that means for them, why Maz identifies as a “bisexual dyke” (like Shiri Eisner!), and how their gender and sexuality inform their artistic work, like their recent solo show, “Let Me Count the Ways”. We also discussed the challenges of getting queer art published & produced, how to deal with rejection and failure, how fashion is a form of speech that communicates who we are, and the value of collaboration and imperfection. Also fairies!Thanks for listening to season 5! Rob will be taking an extended hiatus before season 6 to work on his oral history book, “Bisexual Married Men: Stories of Relationships, Acceptance, and Authenticity”, to be published by Routledge. Stay tuned for info and updates as well as some bonus content and surprises. And please take a moment to rate and review this podcast, and tell your friends -- thanks!Visit Maz’s website: https://www.mazhedgehog.com/Buy Maz’s books: https://www.mazhedgehog.com/shopFollow Maz on Twitter: https://twitter.com/MazHedgehogFollow Maz on IG: https://www.instagram.com/mazhedgehog/“Fat, Black, and Myself: Fashion in the Pandemic”: https://azmagazine.co.uk/fat-black-and-myself-fashion-in-the-pandemic/“Let Me Count the Ways” music composed by Alpha Twang. Follow them on IG: https://www.instagram.com/alpha_twang/Two Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrWe're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohenGo to blendjet.com and use code twobiguys12 to save 12% off your order OR use my special link and the discount will be applied at checkout zen.ai/twobiguys12

This week we’re talking bisexual play parties with the founder and “Chief Conspirator” of the New Society For Wellness (aka NSFW), Daniel Saynt! We chatted about Daniel’s early awareness of his bisexuality, keeping it hidden throughout his conservative religious upbringing, and how entering the world of fashion both exposed him to more sexual fluidity but also convinced him that more openness and transparency was needed. We then focused on the club he founded, NSFW, and how & why it’s specifically geared toward the bisexual community. We discussed play party etiquette and enthusiastic consent, how to overcome anxiety about attending sex parties (and performance anxiety during them), the differences between play parties and kink parties, how norms in sexual spaces can change depending on the gender identity of those involved, why bisexual men seem to love NSFW’s “Frat”-themed party so much (which includes consensual “forced” hazing and bi play), and how queer parties can set themselves apart from “swinger” events. We also talked about weed! Don’t miss it.The New Society For Wellness: https://www.ns-fw.com/Follow Daniel on IG: https://www.instagram.com/danielsaynt/Follow Daniel on Twitter: https://twitter.com/danielsayntFollow NS-FW on IG: https://www.instagram.com/wearethensfw/Follow NS-FW on Twitter: https://twitter.com/wearensfwBuy the FirmTech Tech Ring or Performance Ring: https://myfirmtech.com/collections/firmtechTwo Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrWe're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohenGo to blendjet.com and use code twobiguys12 to save 12% off your order OR use my special link and the discount will be applied at checkout zen.ai/twobiguys12

Continuing our UK-themed season, this week we sat down with Lois Shearing, a bi activist, freelance journalist and writer based in London. We chatted about their journey along the sexuality and gender spectrums, the many Bi+ groups they’ve been part of and helped organize (including the Bisexual Survivors’ Network, the London Bi Pandas, and an LGBT+ knitting club), and their popular writing about bisexuality that’s been published by The Independent, The Advocate, INTO, Openly, and more.We then chatted about Lois’ book, “Bi The Way: The Bisexual Guide to Life”, which was published in 2021, highlighting topics such as being “really bi”, bisexuality as freedom, the bi v. pan “debate”, the challenges of coming out, how to find Bi+ community (and why it’s so important), and how sexuality and gender can be interrelated and interdependent. We also covered quite a few next-level Bi 2.0 topics, as I like to call them – check out the episode for some spicy takes!Buy “Bi The Way: The Bisexual Guide to Life”: https://www.hachette.co.uk/titles/lois-shearing/bi-the-way/9781787752900/Follow Lois on Twitter: https://twitter.com/LoShearingFollow Lois in Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/loisfaith95/Follow Lois on Medium: https://medium.com/@lois.shearingLois' Website: https://faithfullwords.wordpress.com/“Why Bisexuality is a Threat to Terf Politics”: https://medium.com/@lois.shearing/why-bisexuality-is-a-threat-to-terf-politics-5f2b40563e11Two Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrTry MagicMind and get 20% off your order or 40% off a subscription with promo code BIGUYS20: www.magicmind.co/biguysThis podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/twobiguys to get 10% off your first month.We're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohen

It’s almost election day, so we sat down with a civil rights attorney, recent candidate for Justice of the Peace in Texas, writer, activist, proud bisexual man of faith, and mega-fan of this podcast, Andrew Reginald Hairston! We chatted about voting and why it’s so important for queer people to get out the vote and protect our communities (GO VOTE PLEASE!), the freedom Andrew has experienced since coming out, how this podcast appeared at the right moment to help him on his bisexual journey, how his sexuality has impacted his work as a civil rights lawyer and prison abolitionist, and also how it has intersected with his faith community, and his newfound “limitless capacity for love” since embracing his whole identity.We also talked about the highs and lows of dating, how our bisexuality has come into play in negative and abusive relationships we’ve had, and how to cultivate self-worth not just despite a complicated, sometimes-confusing identity but BECAUSE of it – and why we should not just ask for but demand the recognition and respect we deserve. Andrew eloquently reminds us that no matter what happens in the 2022 mid-terms, hope is a discipline, this is just one moment in a long struggle, we are building on the efforts of those who came before, and the future is bright if we work together to take the next step.Follow Andrew on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/andrewrhairston/Follow Andrew on Twitter: https://twitter.com/AndrewRHairstonVisit Andrew’s Website: https://andrewrhairston.com/Two Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrTry MagicMind and get 20% off your order or 40% off a subscription with promo code BIGUYS20: www.magicmind.co/biguysBuy the FirmTech Tech Ring or Performance Ring: https://myfirmtech.com/collections/firmtechWe're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohen

We're all aware of the unfortunate statistics showing that the bisexual community receives a tiny minority of LGBT+ charity resources despite making up a majority of the community itself. But how does that play out and what does it actually mean for Bi+ people?We chatted about that and more with Dominic Arnall, CEO of “Just Like Us” (an LGBT+ young people’s charity) and the only out bisexual man running a queer charity in the UK. He explained what happens when the “B” is neglected in the non-profit space, why we need resources that are dedicated specifically to the Bi+/fluid community (and for kids especially), and what those programs might look like if they were properly funded and prioritized.We also discussed the current political climate and the targeting of trans kids, why the “B” & “T” communities are intertwined and benefit by standing up for each other, and how queerness and gender are evolving and being viewed by young people today. We also touched on Dominic’s own bisexual journey, how his marriage and child have intersected with his queerness, and things to consider when coming out as Bi+ in the workplace.Follow Dominic on Twitter: https://twitter.com/DominicarnallFollow Just Like Us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/justlikeusUKSupport Just Like Us: www.justlikeus.orgTwo Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrThis podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/twobiguys to get 10% off your first month.We're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohen

This week we chatted with author, illustrator, and activist Florence Given, aka “Floss”, about her new (very bisexual!) novel, GIRLCRUSH. Floss gained an online following leading up to her first book, “Women Don’t Owe You Pretty”, a non-fiction feminist primer, before transitioning to fiction and highlighting sexual fluidity in “Girlcrush”.We talked about Floss’s bisexual journey, the biphobia and bi-erasure she’s experienced since coming out, the differences she’s encountered dating men v. women, how not wanting to play into toxic and gendered power dynamics in relationships can lead to being overly cautious, why she wanted to create a “messy” bisexual character who gets confused and makes mistakes, and the unexpected joys that have come with a queer identity. We also discussed what it’s like to be a social media influencer today, the difference between our digital self and our reality, parasocial relationships between creators and their fans, how to deal with online trolls and negativity, and the pleasant surprises that come with a public persona. Finally, we touched on consent, how to recognize and get out of an abusive relationship, and how to reclaim your own power and authenticity.Follow Floss on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/florencegiven/Visit Floss's website: https://www.florencegiven.com/Buy GIRLCRUSH: https://bookshop.org/books/girlcrush/9781914240522Two Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrRob is hosting a Bi+ trip to coastal Maine in June 2023! First 10 to book get $200 off: https://trips.trovatrip.com/trips/united-states-with-rob-cohen-jun-2023

Happy Bi+ Visibility Day and Awareness Week! There's no better way to celebrate than an interview with another true BI-CON, Dr. Mimi Hoang!Dr. Mimi a psychologist, educator, author, and grassroots activist specializing in the LGBTQ+ and Asian Pacific Islander communities -- and she was named “one of the most significant women in the bisexual movement”! In this special episode, we chatted about her family history and bisexual journey, the multiple organizations she co-founded in Los Angeles for Bi+ individuals (including LA Bi+ Task Force and AmBi), how to cultivate resilience, when and how to speak to a psychologist or therapist about your sexuality or gender identity, the cognitive dissonance caused by our actions not matching our words and how coming out can lead to more internal congruence, and the particular challenges of being married and bisexual. Though we do mention the negative mental and physical health outcomes we know are prevalent in our community, we focused our chat on the joys, surprises, and positive aspects of fluid sexuality and the value of building Bi+ community.Visit Dr. Mimi's website: https://www.drmimihoang.com/index.htmlFollow Dr. Mimi on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmimihoang/?hl=enDr. Mimi's Linktree: https://linktr.ee/drmimihoangJoin AmBi! https://www.ambi.org/Dr. Mimi's amazing list of queer and Bi+ resources: https://www.drmimihoang.com/resourcescontact.htmlTwo Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrThis podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/twobiguys to get 10% off your first month.Check out Hinge's "Not-so Frequently Asked Questions: hinge.NFAQ.coVisit tracysdog.com/ and use promo code “twobiguys” to get 15% off, and don’t forget to check out the OG Pro 2.We're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohen