Whether we’re aware of it or not, we each play various roles within our families. And, even if we’ve grown and changed, we often step right back into our role during family gatherings! Do you know your family role? Do you understand how it impacts you during the holidays and throughout the year? Some of us have a sense of our family role. Maybe you’re the instigator or the peacemaker. The caretaker or the rebel. The leader or the clown. But oftentimes we play a role and we’re not even aware we’re doing so! Join Elliott and me for part 1 of our conversation about family roles. As we identify our roles, we gain deeper understanding of ourselves and our family’s dynamics. Plus, learn how to alter your role if you’ve grown out of it and it doesn’t fit you anymore! Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

Triangulation. It’s so easy. We all do it. But, it’s SO unhealthy.  What’s triangulation? Here’s a common example: We get angry, but instead of talking to the person who upset us, we gripe about it with someone else. We loop in a third party. It diffuses the tension, but does it move us toward solving the dispute/problem?  Not at all. As we continue our series on how to connect with our families in a healthy manner throughout the holidays—and always!—Elliott and I discuss the perils of triangulated relationships in families. We provide examples of triangulation and explain the myriad ways it negatively impacts relationships. We leave you with three takeaways for figuring out if you’re involved in a family triangle and more importantly, how to extricate yourself if (when!) you realize you’re in the midst of one. Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

We wrap up this year with some personal reflections regarding Love & Life’s themes of mind, body, and spirit! Elliott and I discuss some revelations we’ve had via the books and articles we’ve read including: Brain Energy by Christopher Palmer, M.D. Joanna Moncrieff’s challenge of the serotonin theory of depression The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk The work of Dr. Caroline Leaf We share some intentions for aligning our minds, body, and spirit in 2024 and invite you to join us in this journey! Happy New Year from Love & Life! Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson Sources cited in today’s episode: https://www.chrispalmermd.com/ The Serotonin Theory of Depression a Systematic Umbrella Review of the Evidence (https://www.nature.com/articles/s41380-022-01661-0) The Serotonin Hypothesis of Depression:  Both Long Discarded and Still Supported? (https://www.nature.com/articles/s41380-023-02094-z) https://www.besselvanderkolk.com/ https://drleaf.com/

Elliott and I continue our series on how to best engage with family members over the holidays with this episode devoted to family rules. All families have a “code of conduct.” Some of these expectations are well known by all members. Others operate just beneath the surface.  How do we manage family rules now that we’re adults? How do we navigate the expectations of our family and then adjust to those of our spouse’s family—especially when these rules are so very different? And furthermore, what if our family’s rules violate the values we now hold as adults? Can we interact with respect for our loved ones while maintaining our integrity and authenticity? Join us to learn how to identify your family of origin’s covert rules to ascertain how they may be impacting you and your relationships.  You CAN remain true to your values and ethics while simultaneously enjoying your family this holiday season!   Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

With the new year right around the corner, you may be thinking about resolutions. Many of us want to level up our health and fitness, but oftentimes we feel daunted because we’ve tried a hundred times before, yet never reached our goals. Help is here! Justin Savich, creator of The Pure Fat Loss Challenge, brings over 20 years of nutrition, strength training, and fitness knowledge to his proven program which has helped thousands of people lose fat–not muscle! Join us for Justin’s expertise about food, exercise, and weight. His inside info helps us sort out fact from fiction in the health and wellness domain–a space that so often feels incredibly confusing with contradictory messages from various factions and agendas. Plus, you’ll have the opportunity to kick off 2024 by participating in Justin’s Pure Fat Loss Challenge beginning on December 27th! Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Justin Savich The Pure Fat Loss Challenge: https://thepurefatlosschallenge.com/  Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

Last week we talked about the importance of maintaining boundaries with our family during holiday gatherings. But what if boundaries aren’t enough? What if we simply can’t get along with our family? We no longer agree on anything and we can’t find common ground. Should we completely cut them off? Or, is there a better way? Today, Elliott and I discuss the Family Systems construct of Individuation and explain why it’s an incredibly important process to move through in young adulthood—whether you’re single or married. We provide concrete steps for healthy individuating and explain how your levels of closeness and separateness to your family of origin directly impact every other relationship in your life—even in adulthood! We leave you with 3 takeaways to help you interact with your family authentically, maturely, and in an individuated manner throughout the holidays. Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

Holiday family gatherings should bring us closer, but sometimes they do the exact opposite! All too often, we get together only to grow apart. Help is here! Implementing principles from Family Systems Therapy allows us to cultivate true intimacy while reducing family drama. In today’s episode, Elliott and I delve into boundaries. We share concrete strategies for establishing boundaries with family members—even those who pry into your business with questions like: “Are you seeing anyone special?” “When are two going to make me a grandma?” “You’re not voting for _____________ next year, are you???” We provide examples of how to: respond to invasive interrogation you don’t care to address.  remain committed to your values and principles without alienating family members whose beliefs differ from yours. mindfully move through difficult conversations.  Join us for a timely conversation designed to prepare you for upcoming family gatherings. Spoiler alert: you CAN maintain boundaries while growing closer! Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Black Friday/Cyber Monday: TWC sale begins on Friday 11/24 through Monday 11/27 end of day! Sale Details: 25% OFF Supplements 20% OFF Monthly Memberships 15% OFF Emergency & Covid Kits (USA RESIDENTS ONLY) Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

The holidays are upon us and in efforts to make the season as bright as possible, Elliott and I want to share principles from one of our favorite therapeutic orientations—Family Systems Theory and Therapy. And yes, siblings can get under our skin in ways no one else can. And sure, in-law interactions may be strained. And of course, blended families present us with unique challenges, but still—we CAN remain joyful at parties and gatherings and we CAN minimize the drama by keeping 3 key principles in mind. Join us for this first episode in our series on how to dial down family drama this holiday season! Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

In fact, we’re taught to avoid talking about finances because it’s considered a bit gauche—especially when you don’t know someone very well. Furthermore, what if you’re not all that proud of your relationship with money? Maybe your bank account refuses to grow and “retail therapy” is your go-to coping mechanism! Or, it seems you just can’t get ahead no matter how much you save! Emily Burnett can relate. She’s a self-proclaimed “money mess” and “budget loather” who was thousands of dollars in debt. But then, she dramatically changed her relationship with money and found freedom in fiscal responsibility!  She shares her journey in her new book, Dear Fellow Spender:  Enjoy Using Your Money to Get Out of Debt, Build Savings, and Create a Life You Love.  And no, we don’t need to have our finances completely sorted out in order to have healthy partnerships, but we do need to have an understanding of our relationship with money—because, research shows it’s a factor that greatly influences marriages. Elliott and I have often discussed the reality that conflict about finances always ranks very high as a factor in why couples get divorced. Our spending habits reflect our values—and you know we’re all about values on Love & Life! So whether you stick to a firm budget or you’re a “money mess” as Emily used to be, we welcome you to this conversation about money, love, and values with Emily Burnett of Moso Money. Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: https://www.twc.health/lovelife Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Emily Burnett Website: https://www.mosomoney.com/  Dear Fellow Spender: https://www.mosomoney.com/book  Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson Citations: https://www.gottman.com/blog/arguments-money-arent-money/ Papp L., Cummings, E., Goeke-Morey, M. (2009). For richer, for poorer: Money as a topic of marital conflict in the home. Family Relations, 58(1), 91-103.

I asked Elliott the other day, “We’ve been talking about cheating and recovery, but what can we do to try to prevent affairs from happening in the first place?” And yes, healing is possible and, as Elliott continues to stress, we may even find deeper intimacy after infidelity. But of course, wouldn’t we prefer to grow closer to our spouse without going through a marital breakdown? In this conversation, we present 3 strategies for keeping your marriage solid and connected! We can’t control our partner, but we CAN take steps ourselves to strengthen our bond and increase the likelihood of remaining faithful to each other. Elliott and I share examples of what we do personally to keep the fire burning (REO reference for our fellow GenXers 🙂) in our marriages–along with research and Elliott’s clinical expertise gleaned from over 30 years of working with couples. We leave you with 3 practical, actionable steps to take today to help you NOT to stray! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson