WTF is on my Mind?!

Mark Vicente
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Nov 16, 2025 • 1h 1min

Radical Self-Respect After Narcissistic Abuse w/ Jared Mello

What does it really take to stop repeating toxic patterns? To finally choose yourself after trauma, addiction, and emotional chaos?In this episode of WTF is on My Mind?!, I sit down with Jared Mello — aka The Wizard of Radical Self-Respect — to unpack the brutal, beautiful road to reclaiming yourself after abuse, addiction, and entanglement with toxic systems and people.Find Jared Mello Online:YouTube: @jaredmelloWebsite: https://radicalselfrespect.comInstagram: @wizard_of_radical_self_respectE-Book: “Radical Self-Respect: Avoid Falling for the Same BS”Jared is a coach, content creator, and advocate for survivors of narcissistic abuse and coercive control. He brings lived experience: childhood dysfunction, undiagnosed neurodivergence, addiction, trauma, and relationships with narcissistic and borderline partners. Out of that crucible came a powerful philosophy: Radical Self-Respect — the inner work that helps you stop outsourcing your worth and start protecting your peace.We cover:Jared’s journey from addiction and chaos to grounded leadershipHow narcissistic abuse shows up in romantic and family systemsThe overlap (and difference) between trauma and autismMale survivors, man-hating trends, and breaking silenceWhy clarity isn’t the same as healingCults, image management, and sneaky-fucker-fish (yes, really)Small, concrete steps you can take TODAY to start respecting yourselfSupport the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Nov 2, 2025 • 49min

Borderline or Narcissist? w/ Richard Grannon

In this episode, I sit down with Richard Grannon to ask the question that’s been on my mind for a while: What is Borderline Personality Disorder? And when you're trying to figure out someone's irrational behavior, is it BPD? Complex PTSD? Or Vulnerable Narcissism?I’ve encountered some wildly confusing behavior in recent years—emotional whiplash, contradictions, disappearing boundaries—and I’ve been trying to make sense of it. This is not an academic exercise for me. It’s personal.Richard and I unpack how BPD is often misdiagnosed, how it overlaps (and diverges) from narcissism, and why trauma is at the root of so many misunderstood behaviors. We also talk about the difference between having a moral core… and operating without one.If you’ve ever felt crazy after dealing with someone whose personality seems to shapeshift—or if you’re trying to figure out what the hell just happened in a past relationship—this one might hit home.Support the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Oct 26, 2025 • 59min

Victim Blaming w/ Richard Grannon

This conversation with Richard Grannon covers a topic I’ve been wanting to unpack for a long time: the tension between self-reflection and what often gets labeled as victim blaming. If you’ve experienced narcissistic abuse, coercive control, or cult manipulation, you’ve probably come up against this moment — where someone talks about agency or healing, and it lands like blame. I’ve felt that too. Richard and I dive into why that happens, what the term victim blaming originally meant, and how weaponized language online can derail the recovery process. We talk about grief, rage, childhood trauma, fawning, codependency, covert contracts, and why some of the most powerful healing comes after we stop outsourcing our agency — without ever denying the harm done. This isn’t about blaming survivors. It’s about finding a way back to power. To De-Cult your news feed, sign up for Ground News using my affiliate link. 40% off the normal price. https://ground.news/checkout/all?fpr=mark93Support the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Oct 19, 2025 • 13min

Narcissistic Abuse is like Radiation Poisoning

To De-Cult your news feed, sign up for Ground News using my affiliate link. 40% off the normal price. https://ground.news/checkout/all?fpr=mark93What if narcissistic abuse doesn’t show up right away… but builds up like radiation in the body—silent, invisible, and devastating over time?In this solo episode, recorded from Cape Town, I reflect on family lineage, legacy, and the long-term effects of being around narcissists—especially the malignant kind. Inspired by a visit to my family's grave site, I look at how the effects of unresolved pathology gets passed down through generations… and how it quietly shapes our choices, fears, and dreams (or lack of them).We’ve been way too focused on diagnosing the “radioactive substance.” But what about the people slowly getting poisoned just by being in its presence?Check out my other podcast, "Remember Your Greatness"https://www.youtube.com/@UCHUIodar-kbyUr0rmst2j1gSupport the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Sep 21, 2025 • 1h 2min

Are Narcissists Born or Made? w/ Dr Peter Salerno

In this episode of WTF is on My Mind?!, I sit down with Dr. Peter Salerno — a retired psychotherapist and author who has spent decades studying personality disorders, psychopathy, and complex trauma.Our conversation dives straight into one of the most heated debates in psychology: are narcissists shaped by trauma and upbringing, or are some people simply born with traits that evolve into full-blown disorders? Dr. Salerno challenges the conventional belief that all narcissism stems from childhood wounds, pointing to research in genetics and neuroscience that shows a far more complicated picture.We also unpack his concept of “traumatic cognitive dissonance” — the paralyzing confusion survivors experience when an abuser deliberately installs contradictory realities in their minds. It’s not just internal conflict; it’s an engineered state of disorientation that keeps people stuck in toxic relationships and systems of control.From there, the discussion widens: we explore how support groups can restore a shattered sense of reality, why some people lose touch with their identity after abuse, and what it really takes to rebuild a self when you were never given the space to form one in the first place. We also look at narcissistic emptiness, the myth of the “hidden shame,” and why grandiosity — not insecurity — may actually be the engine driving narcissistic behavior.The conversation doesn’t stay confined to therapy rooms. We talk about the ways these dynamics show up in society at large — from political polarization to media manipulation — and how it all echoes the same psychological warfare found in abusive relationships.This was a fascinating and unsettling deep dive into human psychology, which left me with a whole new lens on abuse, personality, and power.Dr. Peter Salerno’s website: https://drpetersalerno.comBooks on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Dr.-Peter-Salerno/author/B09NCBTPMLYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@UCYlLHe7DyXJiOWO7kceUAHA Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drpetersalerno/Support the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Sep 14, 2025 • 1h 4min

WTF Happened to God in Psychology? w/ Richard Grannon

New Youtube Channel and Podcast - "Remember Your Greatness"Youtube Channel   Apple Podcasts   SpotifyMentoringIn this episode of WTF Is On My Mind?!, I sit down with Richard Grannon for a deep dive into the strange history of psychology, its blind spots, and what happens when we ignore the transpersonal, morality, and meaning.We ask the uncomfortable questions: Why did Freud’s worldview win out over Jung and Adler? What does it say about power, narcissism, and control in the human psyche? And what have we lost by pushing aside God, spirituality, and morality in the therapeutic process?This conversation weaves through:• Freud’s cult-like hold on psychoanalysis and why his ideas gained dominance• Jung’s brilliance and vagueness — and how hippies and bypassers misused him• Adler’s radical focus on responsibility and courage, and why it’s so confronting• How cult leaders twist legitimate psychological insights into tools of abuse• Why psychology struggles with replication, science envy, and false authority• The role of morality in healing trauma (and even reshaping the brain)• The dangers of abandoning spirituality after cult abuse — and what gets lost• The God question: authoritarian caricatures vs. transcendent awe• How nature, dreams, and mystical experience provide real breakthroughs• Science, uncertainty, and the humility we need to face the mystery of existenceRichard and I don’t hold back — we talk about cults, coercion, narcissism, spirituality, and the deep hunger for meaning in a postmodern world. Whether you’ve wrestled with therapy, spirituality, or the aftermath of high-control systems, this one cuts right to the bone.Support the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Sep 7, 2025 • 1h 9min

Bad Vegan Resurrected: Sarma Melngailis Sets the Record Straight

In this follow-up conversation, filmmaker, whistleblower, and podcast host Mark Vicente sits down again with Sarma Melngailis, the woman at the center of Netflix’s Bad Vegan.While the series portrayed her as complicit with Anthony Strangis and ignored key truths, Sarma’s new memoir, The Girl with the Duck Tattoo, reveals the deeper story: years of coercive control, psychological abuse, and dissociation.1st Interview with Sarma: https://youtu.be/p2bA7XiP83gSarma's Book Website: https://thegirlwiththeducktattoo.com/Sarma's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarmamelngailisSarma's Substack:  https://substack.com/@sarmamelngailis?utm_source=user-menuSarma's Website: https://www.sarmaraw.com/This episode explores: • How Netflix distorted her story • What coercive control and dissociation feel like from the inside • The pain of being criminalized and misrepresented by the media • Why intelligent, capable people can still fall prey to predators • The long, messy road of healing and reclaiming truth⚠️ This conversation includes discussion of coercive control, psychological manipulation, dissociation, and emotional abuse. Viewer discretion is advised.This is more than one woman’s story — it’s a case study in how media narratives can erase survivor truth, and how reclaiming your voice becomes an act of survival.Support the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Aug 31, 2025 • 24min

Mind Mapping Insanity: How Cults Normalize Madness

In this episode of WTF is On My Mind?!, filmmaker and whistleblower Mark Vicente explores what happens when we try to understand an irrational or dangerous mind. Whether it’s a cult leader, an abuser, or the mainstream media—attempting to “map” insanity can destabilize one’s own sanity.Brain Talk: How Mind Mapping Brain Science Can Change Your Life & Everyone In It - by David SchnarchMark unpacks the concept of mind mapping—our brain’s instinct to model the thoughts and intentions of others—and shows how it becomes distorted in high-control environments. Drawing from his experience inside NXIVM, he reflects on:The hyper-vigilance around Keith Raniere.The split between a “cult self” and the real self.The chaos of “spaghetti brain” when irrational behavior is normalized.But this is more than just a story about cults. Mark connects these patterns to everyday life, revealing:How media propaganda and lies mimic cult indoctrination.Why truth-tellers are often branded “extremists.”The cost of normalizing hypocrisy, duplicity, and deception as “business as usual.”At its core, the episode is about the hidden psychological toll of mapping madness—and why feeling disturbed may actually be the sanest response to the world right now.Warning: This episode discusses trauma, coercive control, psychological abuse, and systemic deception. Viewer discretion advised.The conversation continues on PATREON, where Mark is able to speak fully and uncensored about the issues Skynet… uhhh… certain platforms won’t allow. Join here: patreon.com/markvicenteSupport the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Aug 17, 2025 • 1h 3min

Drinking Blood, Draining Souls w/ Richard Grannon - The Vampire-Narcissist Connection

In this episode of WTF is on My Mind?!, filmmaker and whistleblower Mark Vicente sits down with Richard Grannon for a conversation that begins with vampires and then branches into a whole labyrinth of topics. They explore how myths like Dracula and other vampire lore may have been early attempts to explain narcissism and psychopathy before psychology even existed. From there, the discussion moves into why narcissists drain people the way vampires feed, why innocence is such a target for predators, and how charisma and charm mask the fangs underneath.As the conversation unfolds, they touch on the emptiness at the core of narcissists, Hollywood’s obsession with writing villains better than heroes, the way shadow work (or lack of it) shapes human behavior, and how suppression fuels cultural fascination with “monsters.” They also examine the darker realities of cult leaders, why people are sometimes drawn to dangerous partners, and the uncomfortable idea that survivors may unconsciously project their own fantasies onto narcissists — a process Richard calls “co-idealization.”The result is a wide-ranging dialogue that moves between myth, psychology, culture, and personal experience. It’s provocative, sometimes darkly funny, and always aimed at deeper understanding of how manipulation and predation actually work.⚠️ Content Note: This episode discusses narcissistic abuse, cult dynamics, predatory behavior, and depictions of violence in media. Viewer discretion advised.ABOUT RICHARD GRANNON:Richard is a psychology expert specializing in narcissistic abuse recovery. His course: Complete Narcissistic Abuse Deprogramming Guide is now live. Richard's YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@UCU9xNc-P8GWAdafmAcNVi6g Richard's Website: www.RichardGrannon.comSupport the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/
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Aug 3, 2025 • 23min

You’re Dead to Me - Shunning as Social Control

In this episode of WTF Is On My Mind?!, Mark Vicente pulls back the curtain on one of the most insidious tools of social control: shunning — not just as a personal act of rejection, but as a systemic, psychological weapon masquerading as moral high ground.This isn’t just about cults. It’s about how cult behavior has gone mainstream — how families, political factions, media outlets, and activist circles now use public exile and cold silence to punish dissent and demand conformity. Drawing on a recent New York Times opinion piece that unintentionally exposes the creeping logic of ideological purity, Mark examines the difference between healthy boundaries and coercive exile, between critical thinking and performative allegiance.He also reflects on his own experience inside NXIVM, where shunning was formal doctrine — and how eerily familiar those same dynamics look in our current cultural climate. From mocking deaths to cutting off loved ones for their beliefs, we’re in dangerous territory when belonging becomes conditional on orthodoxy — be it political, medical, or spiritual.But all is not doom and gloom. This episode also looks at how the spell can break — how real human connection, outside the algorithms and echo chambers, can restore our capacity for nuance, empathy, and even disagreement without destruction.Mark’s take is blunt, piercing, and layered with lived experience — and it just might make you think twice about who’s really being “cultish.”https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/13/opinion/family-politics-arguments-right-wing.htmlhttps://www.reddit.com/r/redscarepod/comments/1m0iyya/nyt_is_it_time_to_stop_snubbing_your_rightwing/Support the showThe views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicenteWebsite: www.markvicente.comYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markvicente/X: https://x.com/markvicenteTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mark_vicenteFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/markvicente/

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