Coming Out Late

How does one “follow the bread crumbs” to discover and/or confirm if they are gay or not? Great question! Married to a man for nearly 30-years, Robin had her “Aha!” moment literally on her 54th birthday. (No. That’s not a typo. She came out to herself at 54-years of age!) Robin takes you on her journey from those first vague and sporadic inner stirrings she felt about women to finally figuring out “what was wrong with her”. Robin shares with us how she cracked-her-case that had been plaguing her and brewing within her for decades - yet seemingly laid dormant throughout her lifetime. In this episode, you will learn about…What you can expect from this and future episodes of the Coming Out Late Podcast Robins’ coming-out story and how she eventually came out to herselfThe events and clues that led-up to Robins’ “Aha!” moment Compulsory-heteronormativity and internalized homophobiaHow did Robin figure out she’s gay? (Cliffhanger Clue: My Secret Research Project, explained in Episode #210 of the Coming Out Late Podcast.)      LINKS TO RESOURCES:Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.comMESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374You can follow Robin on Instagram at www.instagram.com/Late.Blooming.LesbianSupport the show

In this week’s episode, Robin talks about the keys to living a serene and fulfilling life. Robin puts on her philosophical beret and covers topics such as “acceptance”, “surrendering”, “expectations” and “letting go” and what in the world does that have to do with coming out late?Give yourself permission to ‘think’ and ‘do’ differently; because we can!Nothing changes if nothing changes.We ALWAYS have options and choices to ‘think’ and ‘do’ differently.It’s how we respond to adversity, to challenge, that defines our character.We must accept we have no control over people, places, things & situations.The key to life, to serenity, and to living a fulfilled life is ACCEPTANCE.We learn how to accept by learning how to surrender; we learn how to surrender by learning how to LET GO.We need to learn how to let go of - and live free-from - ‘desired outcomes’ and ‘expectations’.The myth about chasing ‘ideal outcomes’. What’s the probability of catching our ‘desired outcomes’? What’s the cost of chasing our desired outcomes?We’re not in the CONTROL business - that’s codependency’s job!Wanna support our “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglassLINKS TO RESOURCES:Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.comMESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show

In this episode of Coming Out Late, Robin broaches a subject - a question really - that she hears almost more than any other topic or question. And that is, “Who Am I? (Since Coming Out Late)”. Maybe we’ve ‘lost ourselves’ in our marriage, or in our careers; maybe we’ve never really ‘been on our own or lived alone’ - ever! “Who Am I?” outside of my marriage, nuclear family and friendships? Do I even know what I’m passionate about?Who Am I Since Coming Out Late? That is the single most asked question among people who have, or are, coming out late.What does it mean, “Life is a journey, not a destination.”The process, (the journey), shapes us more than the outcome does.If we’re only focused on the finish line, we can miss out on our actual life.The meaning of our journey comes from who we become along the way — not what box we end up checking.There is no final, perfect endpoint.Your journey is the life you’re living - right now!Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglassLINKS TO RESOURCES:Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.comSUPPORT GROUPS:MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show

The holidays are upon us and we have only been ‘out’ for a short while; or maybe we haven’t quite come out to everyone yet; or maybe our soon-to-be-ex ‘outed’ you to his entire family. In this episode Robin and Chris talk about the upcoming holidays and how we plan ahead, prepare for and protect ourselves from some seriously uncomfortable holiday experiences.Keys to successful holidays: transparency, openness and honest communication.Use a lifeline if you need one, and have an exit planBe ready for provocative questions by having a few pre-prepared responses.Develop a self-care practice/routine, (e.g., nourish all your sensesWanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglassIf you want more conversations around navigating the holidays when you’ve come out late, check out the previous “Coming Out Late” Episode #205.LINKS TO RESOURCES:Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.comSUPPORT GROUPS:MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show

The holidays can be particularly challenging for those who’ve just come out. Robin shares how to handle difficult situations with care and the importance of keeping lines of communication with your children and/or family as open as possible. Robin also discusses why the New Year is a perfect time to prioritize self care!In this episode, you will learn…How to handle the holidays with your significant other or former significant otherYou don't have to spend an uncomfortable holiday unless there are children involved.Suggestions for how to manage difficult feelings in the same space with othersAdvice for asking your children what they expect on Christmas Eve and Christmas DayTry to be the one that initiates cohesiveness and togetherness and connectedness.The sooner our children realize and can adapt to and embrace change as something that just simply happens, and it's not something to be feared is good.The importance of making self care your number one priorityEncouragement to let go of toxic relationships—no matter who they’re withWe're gonna learn how to love ourselves or we're gonna learn how to shed our codependency because it's a new year.LINKS TO RESOURCES:Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.com.SUPPORT GROUPS:MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show

In this episode of the Coming Out Late podcast, Robin makes a few Coming Out Late Announcements and clarifies a few things about where to find the special Premium Interview episodes.In this episode, you will hear Robin announce…First Premium Interview - Ep. #200: Kristin Key. Purchase it, ($5), at: https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/466637Second Premium Interview - Ep. #204: Alayna Joy. Purchase it, ($5), at: https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/476490MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY SUPPORT GROUP: EVERY Monday, 55 mins; 8pm EST, Zoom, $10 pp via Buy Me A Coffee. No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. Register using this link: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHER Tuesday, 75 mins; 8pm EST, Zoom, $10 pp via Buy Me A Coffee. No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. Register using this link: https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374THE NOT-STRAIGHT SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHER Wednesday - 75 minutes, 12:30pm EST / 9:30am PST, in Zoom, $10pp via Buy Me A Coffee. Wed. No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/93135Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.com.MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show

In this episode, Robin announces the next evolution of the Coming Out Late podcast: Monthly Premium Interviews featuring some of the most inspiring, hilarious, and thought-provoking voices in our queer world.In this episode, you will learn… How you can access these Premium Interviews:Monthly Subscriber: Become a paid Monthly Subscriber to access the ”Premium Interviews” via Buzzsprout, ($4/month). Link to join: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2114849/subscribeOne-At-A-Time: purchase only the Premium Interviews you wish to hear, (one-episode-at-time), thru Buy Me a Coffee, ($5/episode).Kristin Key Link: https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/466637Alayna Joy Link: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2114849/episodes/18153682Announcing the new, FREE, monthly Queer & Sober podcast  — open to everyone, not just those living sober, (accessed wherever you find the Coming Out Late podcast). Links to access the new, monthly podcast — Queer  & Sober:Ep. #199b: (QS.01): “Announcing — A Brand New Community, Retreats & Support Circles”, (Oct. 3, 2025); https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/coming-out-late/id1589128068?i=1000730020799Ep. #203: (QS.02): “Queer & Sober — Finding Belonging”, (Oct. 31, 2025); https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/coming-out-late/id1589128068?i=1000734364173Find the Queer & Sober Facebook Page here: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581399773746Join the “Queer & Sober Community” Facebook Group here: www.facebook.com/groups/4196389017301591/If you’ve been listening, learning, and growing from the Coming Out Late podcast, then please express your appreciation and support Robin by buying a “virtual” coffee. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglassSUPPORT GROUPS:2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.com.MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show

In this special monthly episode of “Queer & Sober”, (a special offering thru the Coming Out Late podcast audience), Chris and Robin talk about one of the most universal parts of being human — belonging.  Chris and Robin's honest and personal reflections on what it's like to navigate recovery as a queer person and to find or build your own communities.In this episode, you will learn…The difference between fitting in (performing for acceptance) and belonging (rooted in authenticity)How queerness and sobriety both ask us to live in truth — and how that truth can feel lonely without communityWhy belonging is biological, not just emotional: how co-regulation, safety, and connection heal our nervous systemsReflections on forgiveness, courage, and community repair — how we hold each other when we don’t get it perfectThe power of “We” over “I” — moving from isolation to connection, from illness to wellnessThe birth of the Queer & Sober community — an invitation to bring your full self, without apology or performanceWanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglassQUEER & SOBER COMMUNITY & RETREATS:-RETREATS - Contact Chris: genderexpansiveyogi@gmail.com-COMMUNITY - Contact Robin: comingoutlater@gmail.comSUPPORT GROUPS:2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.com.MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show

In this week’s episode Robin shares with us her perspective on the frequently asked question, “Am I Less Gay Because I Was, (or Am), Married to A Man?”. Robin also answers the question, “How did you know you were gay? Did you waiver? Did you need ‘an experience’ to know for sure?”Some of the topics you’ll hear Robin share with you are:Contempt prior to investigation; and how does that relate to being newly gay?What is ‘sexuality’? And could it really be fluid?Your truth is yours to define; if you say you’re gay, you’re gay! No one else gets to weigh-in or decide for us.“The fears we don’t face become our limits.”Heterosexual women do not lay awake at night fantasizing about other women.Wanna support our “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglassLinks to Resources:SUPPORT GROUPS:2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.com.MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show

In this episode of Coming Out Late, Robin talks about feeling all the feelings while going through the coming out late journey. Consider this a pep-talk if you willIn this episode, you will learn…  How we are expected to know things we never knew before; do things we’ve never done before.How to accept, acknowledge & be with financial insecurity, loneliness and grief.Taking a look at how much we’ve grown, learned & handled over the year. Acknowledging to yourself that you are exactly where you are supposed to be right here, right now, in this momentWhy it’s dangerous to allow ourselves to idealize our pasts.Purchase a copy of the 1-hour Interview with Kristin Key! https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/466637 Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglassSUPPORT ROBIN: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglassSUPPORT GROUPS:2026 COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: Three Retreats are on the 2026 calendar, they are: Philadelphia, PA, (February 12-15, ‘26); San Diego, CA, (April 4-9, ‘26); Provincetown, MA, "Women's Week", (Oct. 15-18). Request details, by emailing Robin:  Comingoutlater@gmail.com.MESSY MIDDLE MONDAY: Every OTHER Monday Evening - 50 minutes; 8:00pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Next Meetings: Jan. 5, 19; Feb. 2, 16; Mar. 2, 16, 30; Apr. 20, (No Meeting: Apr. 13). No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736THE EXPANSIVE SUPPORT GROUP: Every OTHERTuesday - 75 minutes; 8pm EST / 5pm PST, in Zoom, via Buy Me A Coffee, $10/meeting; Tuesday Meeting Dates: Dec. 30; January 13, 27; February 10, 24; March 10, 24, etc.; No Refunds or Credits given once Registered. https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374Support the show