Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Any ladies out there looking to beat the sissy of Fremont for fun? You have to be white and tatted, but he seems cool if you meet that criteria.By cool we happen to mean decidedly NOT cool. He does however do his video shirtless, which we've come to realize might mean WATCH OUT - not 100% well man sharing thoughts. Plus we talk about Andre the Giant's farts and more importantly his best friends beard. What do you think of a chin strap beard?AND, how many donut holes could you eat in one 12 minute sitting? We feel a competition brewing. Tommy defends the open defecation accusations and MORE!Pull em up! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Skibbity Scabbity doo! We love to pretend to be an instrument with our mouths. It obviously takes WAY more skill to scat than to learn to play an instrument. We are MASTERS of the craft and welcome you to learn from us.Also, God, is he real? Is he a he? Seems unlikely. If you ever wanted proof that religion is likely just comfort food, listen here. We are EXPERTS.Plus, God doesn't like sausage. (This is, of course, difficult to reconcile with the previous paragraph, but we also have an expert on this so just trust us). We have all that plus Dental Updates and much more! Pull em up. Thanks to our sponsors: Stamps.com Code word: MOMFabFitFun.com Code word: YOURMOM Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Open defecation - we're into it. Unfortunately, it's not that popular in Los Angeles. Let's explore where it's still a thing AKA where people know how to party. We thank YOU, the listener for sending in your Ball Hog vids and we talk to everyone's 'Best Friend' Alison Rosen about her new book, Tropical Attire Encouraged. Pull your jeans all the way up for this one, unless you use a wash cloth in the shower (because you are poor).Thank you for supporting our sponsors: ZipRecruiter.com/houseStamps.com code: MOMAdoreMe.com/MomDollar Shave Club:There's no reason not to join! Get yours at DollarShaveClub.com/MOM Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There's a very upset lady in an internet chat room that says a lot of things we can relate to. She's fired up that someone called her the R word and she has a new and exciting version of English to battle back. PLUS, Age Gap Love is our new obsession. It's a show that follows couples who have way too many years in between them and yes, these people are gross. Old dudes, old ladies, just old, old, old. Yuck! Imagine someone loving your grandparents. Well, that's not the best way of putting it. Imagine dating someone that looks like your grandparents. Done vomiting? We have more.AND friend of the show, Tom Rhodes is back after too many years away. He's hilarious and full of travel tales and so much more. Pull your international jeans way up!Thanks to our sponsors: Brooklinen.com Promo code: MOMStamps.com Promo code: MOMSaatvaMattress.comLoomandLeaf.com  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you want to go on a date with a nice lady follow the lead of this episodes opening clip - offer a lady money to have a family with you. Plus, the golden duo of comedy joins us in studio. The Sklar bros also known as the Brothers Sklar put it down. Hilarious guys who are doing a LOT is all you need to know. They are also here to talk about their new documentary, Poop Talk, which as you can imagine, is right up our lane. Did the bros involve Tom and Tina in their new doc? You'll just have to listen. And we ask all kinds of twin questions and these guys are here for it. Lots and lots of laughs with two great comics.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Get your power tools and sex toys ready for a fun, informative episode!The Jeans are high and tight with this one. We examine DPC's and what REALLY counts. Christina has a recent one that she shares. Do you think it should be verified?Tommy has high standards for Starbucks. Just like his dad does for McDonald's. Is he turning into Top Dog? Plus Blueban labels a file that makes the mommies laugh so hard we almost had to stop recording.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

J-J-J-Jean Unit!We found some adult stars who share some pretty gnarly stories about working in their industry and shooting their "Scenes." PLUS Tommy gives us the scoop on his "Scenes." Will he shoot DP's? Boy/girl? Boy/Boy/Girl? We get into all the details of his dream coming true. AND we go further into Love After LockUp. One of the greatest terrible shows of all time. AND just when we thought a listener prank call couldn't be topped, a new Gold Standard is set in this episode. It's totally AMAZE.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week Jean and Jean get together to Meow Down. Here's a cool thing we explore today: God + Swinging. It's pretty neat if you're willing to listen while a stranger has sex with you and your spouse. Just try it. Come on!Plus, we're ALL IN on Love after Lock Up and you should be to. You should also reach out to a felon right now (for a relationship!). AND, one of your made an amazing call posing as Peyton Lafferty. This episode is AMAZE! Please support today's sponsors: ForHim.com/houseStamps.com Code Word: MOMBrooklinen.com Code Word: MOM  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

He's tall, he's (very) young (looking) and he's coming for that title. Johnny Pemberton is in studio and you will find it SO amaze how well he can do and decipher accents. Semen. We know it's great for your skin. Is it also super nutritious? Try it out!AND we may have found a new Burp Champ. Turn the volume WAY UP! Show support by visiting our sponsors: ZipRecruiter.com/houseSaatvaMattress.comSquareSpace.com CODE: MOMRXBAR.com/momshouse CODE: MOMSHOUSE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's just Jean and Jean on this one. Your mother and I hang out and have the fun we always have when you're not around.Put your triple D swingers in a supportive bra, pull you jeans up and enjoy.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices