
Your Kickstarter Sucks
Mike Hale and Jesse Farrar comb through the crowdfunding dumpster to tell you what projects are worth supporting with your hard-earned dollar. So far, it's been absolutely nothing, but whether it's a social media website for dogs, a toilet brush that reminds you to drink more water, or 5,000 offensive card games, maybe something will eventually be good!
Latest episodes

Jul 4, 2018 • 1h 59min
Episode 61: Wife Fraud
I don't care what you call it, just put it up. Just say...ok, we go on break. Like Bernie Mac. And then say Bernie Mac Sanders because you do that impression. Then just do a list, like say: nudie suits, save a horse ride a cowboy, and sex accessories. But say "the guys talk about, etc." before every one so it doesn't look like a grocery list. After that you can say that we do the song of the summer competition, but play it up like it's really fun and they'll get that it's a bit. And say we do a roast battle, too. That should be enough. Oh and plug the music and the patreon. That's it basically. Yeah the whole bathroom is flooded. I gotta go.For more theoretical tops, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks (new ep this week)Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's @LydiaBurrell (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGDqIKuaHxzw6FIbE3q4L5w)Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and the treacherous Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jun 21, 2018 • 1h 57min
Episode 60: Seth Rogenbot
Hmm hmm hmm. Time to post the show, la dee da. Oh hello there. I didn't see you come in. Would you like to listen to Episode 60 of Your Kickstarter Sucks with me? Wonderful. It is about bug scams.For more information on Jonah Hill's exact age, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. The ham there is always kept at the appropriate temperature.Music for YKS is courtesy of:Twitter's @lydiaburrell (https://howelldawdy.bandcamp.com/)Drew toothpaste (theworstthingsforsale.com)and the unbelievable Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jun 13, 2018 • 1h 25min
Episode 59: Mike Didn't Tip
We got him, boys. We finally got The Tipping Coward. On this week's episode, DB and JF play with some passive SCOTUS figurines, pontificate on the goodness of organized society, and finally reveal what's in the damn bowl. Plus, Kombucha chat! To submit a tip on the whereabouts of the Lindbergh Baby, head on over to patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and click the "sign up" button.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of Twitter's @LydiaBurrell (https://howelldawdy.bandcamp.com/), Drew toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the scurrilous Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jun 8, 2018 • 1h 57min
Episode 58: Pasta Points
In this, the ACTUAL 58th episode of YKS, Mike and JF are talkin' The Return of Heep, Bible Wars, and the perks of watchin' TV with your buddy's wife. Plus, the debut of the next hot Netflix show: Office TV. For more reviews of your favorite college posters, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Our latest episode, featuring historian and author Homer J. Simpson, has been widely praised by podcast fans and academics alike.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of:Twitter's @lydiaburrell (howelldawdy.bandcamp.com)Drew Toothpaste (theworstthingsforsale.com)and the erstwhile Mark Brendle Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

May 25, 2018 • 1h 28min
Episode 57: Keeping Up With The Johnsons
Ohhhh baby! It's a new episode and a new theme song baby! @LydiaBurrell hopped back in the studio to give the boys a funky-phresh new sound that you're gonna have to hear to believe. Plus, we get a little taste of Optimus Mike, who shows up to help us do diaper math and the Ted Cruz Face Scrunch. THEN....a crucial update on what everyone was doing at the specific time we asked them to write us an email (mostly driving, which, not great). For more of our favorite freshwater boys, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. And I'll just tell you right now, we don't know a lot about fish.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy @LydiaBurrell on Twitter, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the majestic Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

May 11, 2018 • 1h 27min
Episode 56: Tofurkey Numbers
Jesse and Mike are once again back in the studio, wearing headphones, opening cans into the microphones, sitting down, and all the classic things they're known for on today's episode of YKS. Don't look at my wife! For even more two smart guys content, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Music for this episode of YKS is provided by:Twitter's @LydiaBurrellDrew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and the superlative Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

May 5, 2018 • 1h 35min
Episode 55: The Land Of Milk And Honey
Wait just a minute....WHO'S F*&%^##%(ing Matt Damon here? It's YKS! And it's time to talk about Cat Poison. Mike and JF hit the scams of the week with their trusty sidekick Terrible Christopher, and stop along the way to discuss the shame of having a one-sock-son, the sharp rise in door stop costs, and the delicate precipice of balls quality.To make a donation in honor of listener Emma Leckey, go to https://beechwood.permavita.com/site/EmmaLisaAntunesLeckey.html?s=80 and read about the causes her family has chosen to support. And for more on what French guys are lacking, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Many, some would say too many, bonus hours of content await you.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste (theworstthingsforsale.com), and the muscular Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Apr 27, 2018 • 1h 15min
Episode 54: Mike's Small Business
It's time to talk about Kanye West. Just kidding. Or, I don't know, maybe. Do it on your own time. This is about other stuff. For example: remembering the "Internet as a series of tubes" guy, who is now dead, why our sons hate making deals, 5th Dimensional Shifts, and VUDU Gift Cards. Plus, the complete guide to growing taters in space, and a couple letters for good measure.For more thoughts on which characters in movies should ultimately be named Tom Cruise, head on over to The Flat Earth Network at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Especially if you're a big fan of Vancouver-based stand-up comedians.Music for this episode of YKS is provided by:Twitter's @lydiaburrellDrew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and the one and only Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Apr 17, 2018 • 1h 35min
Episode 53: A Dispatch From Trout Lodge
Best friends gather round the communal iPod, it's time once again for Your Kickstarter Sucks! On today's blister-packed episode, the boys are talkin' MySpace's enormous data hoard, YKSchella, a review of Marvelous (Infinite) War, baby necks, Syria's billboards, and stabbing a....panda????!!!????? Unbelievable! Plus, Mike debuts his highly anticipated Bernie Sanders impression and we read your letters.For more ass crimes, check out Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks. There's more episodes on there. It's a finite amount of them, but I don't think that makes them bad necessarily. Music for this episode of YKS is provided courtesy of:Drew Toothpaste of www.theworstthingsforsale.comTwitter's @lydiaburrelland Maniac Mark Brendle Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Apr 4, 2018 • 1h 37min
Episode 52: A Splice Of Life
52 episodes...52 cards in a deck, not including the jokers. But lucky for you, this show DOES count the jokers. And there's two of 'em (they're the hosts). On this instant classic episode of YKS, Mike and Jesse riff on the saddest part of loved ones dying, sleeping in the trash, bodies falling apart, bulletproof backpack scumbags and covering cat assholes. Plus, Mike reveals his secret Juggalo past, and the boys debut a new segment: The Kitty Kat Two Pack.For more idea on what to take with you into the teleportation machine from The Fly, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. There's some stuff on there, and it is nice.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste of www.theworstthingsforsale.com, and the highly functional Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.