Your Kickstarter Sucks

What if all it took to keep our kids safe from gun violence was an app? What if a wildly untalented rapper could ask for and receive $1MM for no clear reason? What if there were big hard wangs in the official emoji keyboard? Mike and JF, the wildest podcast pardners in the west, answer those questions and more on today's episode of Your Kickstarter Sucks. Plus, the return of Real or Fake (Stick Edition), a bunch of chair noises, and your letters. Check out Hollywood Handbook, the insider's guide to kicking butt and dropping names in the red carpet lined back hallways of this industry we call showbiz, on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app. It's one hell of a program. And that's a fact.Also, the vast archive of YKS Premium is available for your listening pleasure over at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. That money goes straight into my budget for buying boards and screwing them up onto my wall, so I highly encourage you to subscribe today. I need more boards! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wow! Episode 70! The number some people are saying is even funnier than the one before it. Incredible.Sure, on this episode, Mike and JF talk about Mike's old schoolboy days, draining the swump, and $150,000 audio systems in their friends' houses. But wow...70! Haha. The number of it. Dang.For more Adventures of Josek and CH4RL13 the droik, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Over 50 references to contemporary Christian Rock await you!Music for YKS is courtesy of Drew Toothpaste, Lydia Burrell, and the smothered, covered, and capped Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Bus People, Cathouse Appetizers, and Fat Guy Brass Knuckles; this episode's got it all. Thanks. Music for YKS is courtesy of Drew Toothpaste, Lydia Burrell/Howell Dawdy, and the scrupulous Mark Brendle. For more of this stuff, since you love it so much, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. At least a couple hours of stuff on there features waify internet dipshit Stefan Heck. And if you like that guy, it might be fun for you to hear him talk some more. It's not just him, though. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Former President Barack Obama joins the boys to talk tan jackets, NCAA brackets, and kicking butt while kicking butts, or how hard it REALLY is to run a country when you just want a hit of that classic stimulant, nicotine. PLUS! Actor Tom Cruise stops by to discuss the Univers(al)-building classic that wasn't, 2017's The Mummy, dish on the L. Ron Hubbard the public never really got to see, and taste test a cronut. Just kidding, it's the same two fat guys talking about the internet. Enjoy.For more bullshit we just make up, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's essentially the same thing as the free one, but it costs money. Music for YKS is courtesy of Twitter's Lydia Burrell, Drew Toothpaste, and the onomatopoetic Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I'm not uploading this again. If it's not right this time, I quit the show. This is Episode 67. I hope to god. Music for YKS is courtesy of: @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste, and that old serpent Mark Brendle. For more custom microwave tones, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's $5 a month -- probably less than you spend on ancient grains -- and you get hours and hours of podcasts that worked when I uploaded them the first time (with no mistakes whatsoever). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Pull up a chair and have a couple laughs...Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of @LydiaBurrell on Twitter, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com) and the twice-distilled Mark Brendle. For more discontinued smart personal hygiene products, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's only $5, and you can listen to us review gum. Kind of a hard sell there. But it's good. Anyway. Thanks Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Alright, which one of you jokers said it was Episode 66, and was it the same joker that uploaded just 27 minutes of the episode? Just come forward, no questions asked. We're not even mad, haha. For even more (fully uploaded, correctly numbered) YKS content, head on over to www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's communism if you like that kind of stuff, and also it's capitalism if you're one of those guys. So you really can't lose.Music for YKS is provided by Lydia Burrell of Howell Dawdy fame, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the he thinks he's people Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this week's ep, it's ALL about one thing: the subjects of the show. That's right, today we've got a new challenger to the incumbent Squeeze Louise, a new tooth scam going viral, a cardboard (???) trash can, and an update on Jesse's torn hibuscus. Plus, Mike finally reveals his troll score! And lemme tell ya, it's a big one. Music for YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste (www.toothpastefordinner.com), and the ready-in-minutes Mark BrendleCheck out the Patreon page too, if you want, and they probably won't even screw up the payments this time. Thank you www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What What Happens Live is delightful! Inspired by Andy Cohen's experiences in the green room as a producer at CBS, and with a set inspired by his own home den, this show is unlike any other late night talk show. WWHL is fun, spontaneous, and engaging. The eclectic pairings ensure that you see guests in a brand new light. For example, one episode pairs John Mayer with Dan Rather. You would expect these guys to be like oil and water, but the show was the most endearing appearance I've seen from either guest, and the unexpected chemistry was thoroughly entertaining. Watching new guests Plead the Fifth, a game where they are asked three difficult questions and can abstain from answering only one, never gets old. Seeing Scott Baio reluctantly participate in a game called "Andy Loves Crotchy" (and then enjoying the ensuing twitter fallout with Baio's angry wife after the photo of a formal girlfriend was included) is pure gold. Some guests, like Baio, do not embrace the vibe of the show and these episodes are fun in an "I cannot look away from this tension" way. When you have guests embracing the show, like when Jenny McCarthy let Donnie Wahlberg draw a mustache on her face in permanent marker, it's a real riot. Expect the unexpected. A previous reviewer, sylviastel@aol.com, referred to Andy as a misogynist, and this label could not be further from the truth. Bravo has been built on the Real Housewives franchises (grabbing the baton from the Queer Eye success, running with it, and never stopping for a breath). If you are familiar with the Real Housewives, you know these shows to be real life soap operas. The divas allegedly exploited by Andy Cohen love the spotlight and use it as a platform to further their own personal endeavors. Andy asks proactive questions at reunion shows and on the set of WWHL, never to hMusic for this episode of YKS is courtesy of @LydiaBurrell (https://howelldawdy.bandcamp.com/), Drew toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the rascally Mark Brendle.For more episodes of YKS, check out the Patreon page at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on YKS....Mike's Big Deli Story, the inauspicious return of the Dookie List, and a surprise phone call from a stupid little idiot. "Bam!" - Emeril Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: Lydia Burrell (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGDqIKuaHxzw6FIbE3q4L5w), Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the cowardly Mark BrendleAnd for more battery capers, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. C'mon! Do It! please Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.