Dial Emma

Welcome to this episode of Best Friend Therapy, where we chat about what's on our minds, to get deeper in our minds.This episode is all about competition - how it can become a problem when it comes from a place of scarcity and how we can learn to develop an abundance mindset that allows us to reach our goals more securely and meaningfully. We look at competition through the lens of attachment theory and explore the difference between belonging and fitting in.Elizabeth takes a break from training for Paris 2024 to unpack her relationship with jealousy, and Emma tucks into some cheese that she made on her own sustainable dairy farm.---You can listen to Elizabeth's conversation with Brené Brown in Season 13, Episode 1 of How to Fail here: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/how-to-fail-with-elizabeth-day/id1407451189?i=1000547612407Emma references various psychological concepts in this episode, including:Drivers: Kahler, T. (1975). Drivers—The Key to the Process Script. Transactional Analysis Journal, 5:3 http://changingminds.org/explanations/motivation/kahler_drivers/kahlers_drivers.htm#navProcess Scripts: Kahler, T. (2008). The Process Therapy Model: The Six Personality Types with Adaptations, Taibi Kahler Associates, Inc. http://changingminds.org/explanations/models/kahler_scripts.htmReparenting and Redecision therapy: these and many other concepts are covered in this brilliant introduction to Transactional Analysis https://www.amazon.co.uk/Today-New-Introduction-Transactional-Analysis/dp/1870244028There is a wealth of information available about attachment theory but one of Emma's favourite books is: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Attachment-Psychotherapy-David-J-Wallin/dp/1593854560Edit: thank you so much to Gemma who emailed us with a reference for the mice! From the Prologue of: Pearce, C (2016). A Short Introduction to Attachment and Attachment Disorder (Second Edition). London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. To contact us, email contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy

Welcome to this episode of Best Friend Therapy, where we chat about what's on our minds, to get deeper in our minds.TW: eating disordersThis episode is all about bodies - how we can divorce our bodies from our minds if we're not careful, how we feel about our physical appearance and what getting older means for us. Covering areas such as fertility and menopause, social media and dress sizes, we share our relationships with our own bodies on a journey to befriending them, and hope that it can help you do the same.Elizabeth reminisces about a time before exercise was popular and Emma dusts off her leg warmers to resurrect her role as student aerobics instructor.---Elizabeth references an exhibition called "Body Worlds", showcasing the work of Dr. Gunther Von Hagens.---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. To contact us, email contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy

Welcome to this episode of Best Friend Therapy, where we chat about what's on our minds, to get deeper in our minds.This week we're talking about special occasions - from the happiest day of your life to the most wonderful time of the year - and why they're not always what they're cracked up to be. Ironic, given that today is actually Emma's birthday (but don't mention it, will you?)Whether it's a wedding, Christmas Day, a birthday dinner, or simply a Sunday lunch, we talk about why special occasions can bring more pressure than pleasure, and how to design an occasion that's special for *you*.Find out why Emma is allergic to birthdays and take a chilling trip down Memory Lane with Elizabeth, as she relives her magic candle nightmares.---Gary Chapman's book "The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts" is widely available. You can take the Love Language quiz here: https://www.5lovelanguages.com/---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. To contact us, email contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy

Welcome to this episode of Best Friend Therapy, where we chat about what's on our minds, to get deeper in our minds.This week we're talking about Imposter Syndrome and why, if you've ever felt like the odd one out, you're in good company.Join us on an Inception-like head-scratcher as we experience Imposter Syndrome whilst talking about Imposter Syndrome in an attempt to make the episode "good enough", learn why tennis remains Elizabeth's Achilles heel and why Emma will never have a job as a pizza chef. ---Malcolm Gladwell talks about 10,000 hours of practice is his fantastic book, 'Outliers'.https://www.amazon.co.uk/Outliers-Story-Success-Malcolm-Gladwell/dp/0141036257Emma and Elizabeth talk about the original study into Imposter Phenomenon, for which the reference is: Clance, P. R., & Imes, S. A. (1978). The imposter phenomenon in high achieving women: Dynamics and therapeutic intervention. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research & Practice, 15(3), 241–247.Brene Brown speaks about belonging versus fitting in within her book 'The Gifts of Imperfection'. shorturl.at/bmxIXThe School of Life has produced a great video on Imposter Syndrome: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eqhUHyVpAwE---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. To contact us, email contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy

Welcome to this episode of Best Friend Therapy, where we chat about what's on our minds, to get deeper in our minds.TW: miscarriageThis week we're talking about shoulds and oughts and why we feel compelled to live our lives by some pretty tough rules at times. Elizabeth shares times in her life when structure has helped her to feel in control and Emma explains why criticism can sometimes be tough to take. Correction: Emma did not know that Tetrapak cartons were now widely recyclable. She *should* know better.---Emma refers to personality adaptations in this episode (as distinct from disorders) and you can read more about obsessive-compulsive and passive-aggressive processes in the book 'Personality Adaptations', by Vann Joines and Iain Stewart, available from all good booksellers or at https://www.amazon.co.uk/Personality-Adaptations-Understanding-Psychotherapy-Counselling/dp/187024401XClaude Steiner's book, 'Scripts People Live', offers great insights into the behavioural templates we lay down in early life. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Scripts-People-Live-Transactional-Analysis/dp/0802132103/ref=sr_1_1?adgrpid=51732384845&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIlZWvoZXz9gIVycLtCh08vgU7EAAYAiAAEgKtePD_BwE&hvadid=259059343144&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9045896&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=17815643095787796303&hvtargid=kwd-299710077529&hydadcr=24405_1748889&keywords=scripts+people+live&qid=1648826478&sr=8-1Emma quotes Eric Berne's work on ego states and the Parent-Adult-Child model. You can find out more at https://ericberne.com.---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. To contact us, email contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy

Welcome to this episode of Best Friend Therapy, where we chat about what's on our minds, to get deeper in our minds.This week we're talking about games. Not Monopoly, as Elizabeth discovered, but the shortcuts we take in relationships to try and get our needs met, without even realising.Relationship games are the emotional sleight of hand we use to defend our vulnerability but they rarely get us what we want. Emma explains where games stem from and why they get in our way at work and with friends, and Elizabeth looks back on her dating past to understand that what she'd needed was clear communication, not a soulmate who could mind-read. We also discuss the likeability of cheese.---Emma quotes the work of Eric Berne in this episode. You can find out more at https://ericberne.com/games-people-play/The Drama Triangle, is a model developed by Stephen Karpman and originally featured in his article: Karpman MD, Stephen (1968). "Fairy tales and script drama analysis". Transactional Analysis Bulletin. 26 (7): 39–43. You can read more about his work at https://karpmandramatriangle.com If you're interested in the therapeutic approach of Transactional Analysis, which Emma practices, a great entry point is a book by Iain Stewart and Vann Joines called TA Today, available at all good booksellers or at https://www.amazon.co.uk/Today-New-Introduction-Transactional-Analysis/dp/1870244028---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. To contact us, email contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy

Welcome to the FIRST EVER EPISODE of Best Friend Therapy! Each week we'll open the doors to our friendship and chat about what's on our minds, to get deeper in our minds. And today we're starting with a conversation about something we all need in our everyday lives - boundaries.We explore what boundaries mean to us, how to set them and how to say no. Elizabeth tells us why she says sorry all the time and Emma gives us practical ways to renegotiate relationships at home and at work. Thank you so much for listening and we'd love to hear what boundaries mean for you! (Just don't phone Elizabeth, apparently she *really* hates the phone.) Two best friends. One therapist. Zero filter.---Elizabeth quotes Mark Groves, Human Connection Specialist, in this episode. You can find out more at https://markgroves.com---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. To contact us, email contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy